Dexter Season 1 Episode 5

Dexter: (voice over) The inability to feel has its advantages. Sometimes.

Dexter: Do you have a dream for your life? Your future? Yes?
Rita: Of course. Do you?
Dexter: It might sound weird. I want to someday be content. Just feel comfortable, like everyone else. I want...
Rita: ...a normal life?
Dexter: Yeah, a normal life.
Rita: That's all I want. Just that.
Dexter: No fame and fortune? Excitement at every turn?
Rita: No, I've had enough excitement, thank you. I'll take boring.
Dexter: Average.
Rita: Ordinary.
Dexter: That's weird, huh?
Rita: Yeah.

Dexter: Be prepared, that's my motto, the boy scouts and I have that in common. Of course, there's no merit badge for tonight's outing.

Angel: (giving relationship advice to Dexter) Don't go down that emotional road, just go down on her, it's easier, and she'll be distracted.

Dexter: (about Angel) I wonder what I did to make him think we're so close. I wonder if it'd work on Rita.

Rita: You think they'll catch whoever did this?
Dexter: I think he'll get what he deserves.

Jorge: I love you.
Valerie: I love you so much.
Dexter: I'm going to ask you a question and I want you to answer me honestly, understand? No more bullshit. How long have you been married?
Valerie: Twelve years.
Dexter: How do you love each other? You're like me, you make it work. how?
Jorge: We want the same life.
Valerie: We want the same thing
Dexter: You share the same dream?
The Castillos: Yes that's it.
Dexter: That's, uh, helpful. Thank you.
(Stuffs cotton in their mouths in preparation to kill them)

Harry: That you, Dex?
Dexter: Yeah, sorry I'm late.
Harry: It's okay, son. Must have been having fun.
Dexter: No, I pretended to.
Harry: That's good, Dexter.
Dexter: Dad, do you think that maybe one day I'll, you know, feel it for real?
Harry: I hope so, son. I really do.

Dexter: (voice over) The problem with acting normal is that normal people get into stupid situations like this.

Harry: Dexter, women are different from men.
Dexter: We've had this talk, Dad.
Harry: I'm saying, they have a whole different experience of things. When they're with someone physically, they feel connected and they know when you're not. They can sense it because you're very exposed.
Dexter: Yeah, you're naked.
Harry: I mean emotionally. Son, this is going to be very dangerous for you.
Dexter: Well, I can fake it.
Harry: Buddy, you can learn to fake a lot of things, but this is a tough one.

Dexter: (Voice over while watching Castillo) Yeesh. New money. Normal people dream of this, a new car, a big home, a boat at the Reefshore Marina, and a beautiful wife. Too bad, I never enjoy making someone a widow. They're so happy. She has no clue who she's with. Maybe that's the key to a successful relationship.

Dexter: Should I?
Rita: No I'll go with her, she might need a shoulder.
Dexter: (Voice over) She senses I'm not a shoulder, bad sign. She's catching on.

Dexter: (Voice over) I don't understand America's obsession with cars. I can just imagine squeezing Rita and the kids into this thing. Hitting the open road, cramped quarters, public bathrooms, hours of nothing but conversation. Someone's American dream, my nightmare.

Dexter: I just assumed you were Cuban.
Jorge: I'm American, pal. Just like you.
Dexter: Just like me.

Dexter: (Voice over about his relationship with Rita) It always come to this when sex is introduced. Small talk no longer cuts it. Eventually she'll call me a science project and slam the door in my face.

Rita: Every night after work Yelina goes across the street to the beach. I've seen her there, just staring at the water and willing him to walk out of it. Have you ever longed for anything like that?
Dexter: (Voice over) She wants something from me. Ever since the blow job she assumes we've taken it to the next level. She doesn't know yet I don't have a next level.

Dexter: (Voice over) I like to pretend I'm alone. Completely alone. Maybe post apocalypse, or plague, whatever. No one left to act normal for, no need to hide who I really am, it would be freeing.
Doakes: Stop grinning like a fucking Psycho and get back to work!

Dexter: (Voice over) My favorite serial killer is a lozenge eater. How human of him.

Vince: Who had garlic for lunch?
Deb: I'm gonna punch you in the neck.
Vince: Actually, I think you're going to french me.
(Vince holds up lozenge wrapper)

Dexter: Somehow it's reassuring knowing I'm not the only one pretending to be normal.

Harry: It's important that you seem normal.
Dexter: Even though I'm not?
Harry: Because you're not.

Police Officer: I know you want to help out your maid, but there ain't a whole hell of a lot you can do.
Dexter: (Voice over) You'd be surprised.

Police Officer: Freedom is just another word for one more way to get fucked.