Dharma & Greg

Season 2 Episode 6

A Closet Full of Hell

Aired Unknown Oct 28, 1998 on ABC



  • Trivia

  • Quotes

    • Ted: So, this is a Halloween tradition for you guys.
      Jane: Yep. I scare the crap out of her; she turns around and does it to me.
      Mrs. Shumacher: How long has this been going on?
      Jane: This is the first year.

    • Kitty: Why did I get out of bed? Why?
      Larry: What does that mean?
      Edward: It means she's going to start drinking early today.

    • Dharma: (After meeting Mrs. Shumacher in the attic/storage room) Told you!
      Greg: Is that how you want to play this?
      Dharma: Yes, please.

    • Kitty: Oh, Larry, that is wonderful. Thank you!
      Larry: My pleasure.
      Kitty: (Rocking the table) It's not level.
      Larry: Oh, I can adjust that. (Puts a matchbook under the uneven table leg.) There you go. Solid as the white man's hold on the Senate.
      Kitty: You're not going to leave that matchbook under there, are you?
      Larry: You bet.
      Edward: She means "Don't leave that matchbook under there".
      Kitty: Edward, I can speak for myself. (To Larry) Don't you want to sand the legs so that they're level?
      Larry: Nah, not really.
      Edward: She means "Do it".
      Larry: Ok.
      Kitty: (Dripping with sweetness) Thank you.
      Larry: What does that mean?
      Edward: I don't know, but it rarely means "Thank you".

    • Pete: You smell something burning?
      Greg: That's sage. White sage.
      Pete: And why is white sage burning?
      Greg: Because Dharma and her mother and Jane are having kind of an exorcism.
      Pete: (Nodding) Ah.
      Dharma: (Rushing into the room) Honey, have you seen the big, plastic trash can and the molasses?
      Greg: Uh, kitchen.
      Dharma: Thanks.
      Pete: Trash can?
      Greg: Spirit catcher. It's got a good, tight lid.
      Pete: So, what? You catch more evil spirits with molasses than with vinegar?

    • Greg: Look at that! Look at him run!
      Pete: Maybe a doll scared him.

    • Pete: So you're saying you weren't scared?
      Greg: Scared of what? Dolls?
      Pete: Jane said you screamed.
      Greg: I did not scream.
      Pete: She said you screamed like a woman.
      Greg: It's because I was in pain. I fell.
      Pete: She said you fell pushing Abby out of the way.

    • Greg: Dharma, I did not unpack the dolls.
      Dharma: Oh, God.
      Greg: This is a real head scratcher.
      Dharma: Yeah, you scratch. I'm moving!
      Greg: What? Where are you going? We're having a housewarming.
      Dharma: Yeah, it's warm enough. What are you waiting for, a pitchfork in the ass?

    • Kitty: Now tell me; if I wanted to purchase a set like this, how would do it without actually venturing into the east bay?
      Larry: I don't know. I don't sell them anywhere else.
      Edward: What she means is: Finkelstein, can she buy one from you now?
      Larry: Oh, sure. (Directly to Edward) Tell her yes.
      Edward: (To Kitty) He says yes.

    • Kitty: What a lovely gift, Larry. Did you make this yourself?
      Larry: Yep.
      Kitty: You're right, Edward. He is part savant.
      Larry: Hand-crafted with hand-crafted handcrafting tools that I hand-crafted.
      Kitty: Then there's the other part.

    • Jane: Heard you got some evil demons.
      Greg: Aw, don't tell me you believe that stuff, too.
      Jane: No, but you gotta admit it's pretty spooky what happened to the people who lived here before you.
      Greg: What happened?
      Jane: They were kind of quiet, kept to themselves, never talked to anyone in the building. One day they moved, no one heard from them again. Spooky, huh?
      Greg: (Muttering to himself) Everything's spooky when you say it.

    • Jane: Happy Housewarming.
      Greg: Thanks! It...it's open.
      Jane: Yeah. It's good, too.

    • (Greg tips the doll over, causing it to say "Ma ma".)
      Dharma: Oh, my God. That doll just said "Dharma".
      Greg: No, it said "Mama". See? (Tips doll over again; doll says "Ma ma" again)
      Dharma: I am not your mama. Go back to Hell!

    • Greg: Dharma, you're not really scared of these things, now are you?
      Dharma: No, I'm wet myself scared of them, Greg.

    • Greg: I was thinking about giving the dolls to a charity.
      Dharma: What, like the Salvation Army of Darkness?

    • Dharma: What are you doing in there?
      Greg: Come here. See? I cleaned it all out; this is going to be a great storage space.
      Dharma: Yeah, for our blood-drained bodies.
      Greg: Yeah. Or skis.

  • Notes

  • Allusions

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