Dharma & Greg Season 2 Episode 2

Kim: Who are you calling a lunatic, you catalog hag?
Kitty: Don't you sass me, young man.

Dharma: Fergus. Like fungus with an 'erg.'

Prospero: I'm going to teach the boy about his African heritage.
Greg: Oh, we were going to do that.
Prospero: So you have a drum?
Greg: No.
Prospero: Then you weren't going to do a very good job, were you?
Greg: Guess not.

Kitty: So what's next? We all move to the moon and farm broccoli under some big glass bubble? Fine, fine, just tell me what to wear.

Abby: If you are near a forest or a wooded area we need moss.

Dharma: Why didn't you have any more kids?
Kitty: I couldn't have any more after Gregory.
Dharma: Oh really? I'm sorry, why?
Kitty: It hurt too much. Smart women never forget that kind of pain.

Sean: You want injustice? You try getting a record contract.
Jane: That's not injustice. You suck.

Kitty: Where is the baby?
Dharma: I left him with Edward.
Kitty: Oh, are you out of your mind? Haven't you ever felt that dent in Gregory's forehead?

(Dharma hugs Kitty)
Kitty: Oh, dear God, what is she going to do to me now?

Kitty: My son marries a woman he's known for one day, moves into a building I wouldn't store my coats in, his mother-in-law talks to plants, and his father-in-law hears them talk back.

Dharma: Guess who put on a bra for you!

Dharma: Your body is your temple, but it is also your dance hall and your bowling alley.

Edward: Fergus? Fergus? Where do I know that name from?
Kitty: He's your uncle, Edward.
Edward: I don't have an Uncle Edward.