Dharma: Well, I'm not paying these tickets because it's wrong. Greg: Dharma, you have to pay them. Dharma: Excuse me, even you said that the law was wrong. Greg: I know, but you can't fight city hall. Dharma: (entering the municipality building and approaching the guard) Hi, I'm here to fight city hall. Guard: Third floor.
Dharma: (Putting money into parking meter just before the meter maid approaches.) Hey, just trying to be a good neighbor. Meter Maid: That's not you car? Dharma: No, just a random act of kindness. Meter Maid: Well it's against the law; you can't put quarters in other people's meters. Dharma: Wait a minute, how is it against the law to help somebody? Meter Maid: Don't know, don't care.
Larry: Where have all the flowers gone? Answer me that! Edward: You've smoked them all, Finkelstein.
Dharma: My problem is very simple; I'm a parking meter fairy.
Pete: There is no Eileen, I made her up. Greg: But you said you had met her parents and they hated you. Pete: They would have.
Greg: (Answering the phone) Hey Larry, what's up? No, I'm pretty sure you called me.
Dharma: (Answers telephone) Improve your karma, vote for Dharma!
This episode's end titles has Chuck Lorre's Vanity Card #27.
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