Dirt

Lucy: (on the phone with Dana Pritchard's manager) Jimmy you better tell me the truth, because if I have to get it out of you, you ain't gonna like it. (hangs up)

Lucy: (on the phone with Dana Pritchard's manager) Don't take this personal, but you're an idiot, which is not my objection; my objection is that you would assume I would believe an idiot.

Lucy: (talking to the security guard) If these assholes screw up my cover, we're going to have a few more names to put on that list.

(on the phone) Kenny: Have you heard the news? Lucy: Okay let's save some time here and assume that I haven't.

Security Guy: No offense but I've been to parades with fewer people than your list of possible suspects. Lucy: None taken. If it were smaller I'd be unemployed.

Gareth: Open your eyes wide, it's the only way to see what you can't look at. (laughing softly) This is a Haiku. 5 syllables followed by 7 then 5 again. Lucy: So I'm being stalked by a poet? Gareth: And not a very good one.

Lucy: Well, he left this in my paper this morning. Gareth: What makes you think it's a he? Lucy: (laughing derisively) 'Cause I don't know any woman who has that kind of time on her hands.

Sammy Winter: I got dogs, four of them. I'm a dog man myself. (Later in the conversation) Don: I like cats. Cats are quiet and loving and they know when to give you your space. Sammy: I say it's dogs all the way. Don: (while taking pictures of Sammy) That's because you're a narcissist. You can't live without excessive admiration, adulation, attention and affirmation; dogs'll give you that. Their love is like a mirror of how you'd like to perceive yourself as seen by others. Sammy Winter: Oh really? Don: Most likely a result of your bitter disappointment and radical disillusionment with significant others during childhood. Sammy Winter: Anything else, Freud? Don: Four dogs is a lot.

Don: When I was growin' up we used to have this poodle called Frenchy. Lucy: Frenchy? Don: Whenever my Dad would come home, he'd walk right past me and my Mom and go play with the dog, like we weren't even there. He tried his best. He was the one who got me into wearing hats. He wore hats all the time. When he'd come home drunk he'd say the best way to sober up is to put on your hat. It reminded him of when he used to be somebody. I bought him this hat but he never wore it. I love hats. You think about your Dad? Lucy: I was at a friend's house before I came home and found him. And I'd had a cigarette. My first and only one. I remember being so scared that my Dad was gonna smell it on me, that I walked home and I was just trying to get the smoke out of my hair. And when I saw him, (Lucy starts to break down) hanging there, I actually thought for one second that God was punishing me for smoking. Don: I think sometimes life is too small for Dads. (hugs Lucy)

Lucy: Hello? Holt: Hey. Movie's wrapped. Lucy: Oh great, just in time for Julia's homecoming. How is she? Holt: She's ok I guess. Lucy: What is it you want Holt? Holt: I don't know. Lucy: Well, call me when you do. Holt: No, no, wait - Lucy. I need to see you. Lucy: Why? Holt: Now come on, does it have to be like this? Lucy: I need to hear it. All you need to do is ask Holt. Holt: OK look, I can't stop thinking about you, you know? It's like you're in my head all the time. I need to be…with you. Lucy: You mean inside of me? Holt: Yeah. Lucy: I can't I have a lot of work to do. Call me later.

Kenny: Sammy Winter called again said it was about a follow-up interview? Lucy: We've done enough stories on Sammy Winter and his futile attempt at rehab. The prostitutes, the trials and tribulations of being a child start. Unless he's banging an Olson twin or he has bought some ad space, I don't give a sh*t. Kenny: Johnny Gage is in your office. Lucy: Johhny Gage is in my office and you open with Sammy Winter? Way to bury the lead.

Sammy: (about Don) He's not right, is he? Lucy: Oh, he's the best there is.

Sammy: In the future when Sammy Winters calls, I suggest you take it.