Dirty Jobs

Mike: You gotta dirty job. Steve (roofer): Thank you. Mike: You're welcome. Steve: I'm glad I could share it with you. Mike: My pleasure (drops his shovel). I'll never see you again! Steve: All right.

Mike: I just tarred my toes, now I'm gonna have webbed feet. Great.

Mike: Now what's the best place for me? You wanna see me down here being miserable loading or up there being miserable catching? Steve (roofer): We gotta be up here loading and then we can move up to the top and you can do a little catching. Mike: Spread the misery around. Steve: Yeah, that's right baby.

Mike: So we got an ax, a kettle full of hot tar, and a church, wanna have an inquisition?

Mike: Holy crap I'm moving a house!

Mike: Okay, now what incredibly stupid and treacherous thing can I attempt?

Mike: What a stupid way to die, in the middle of a street with an ax, busting up petroleum products.