Dirty Sexy Money

Karen: Do what you want. Just keep it short. Brian: See you in seven hours. Freddy: Woo! Amen to that! Because we are in it to win it!

Karen: I'm kinda having second thoughts about the wedding.
Letitia: Yeah, I assumed that was what you meant. Is this about Nick? Is it?
Karen: Nick? No. No. No, Nick hasn't even entered my mind today. It's about Freddy. He's not exactly complicated.
Letitia: You're just like your father. You want fairy tale love. You're a romantic but what's really romantic is to wake up every morning and say "I choose you, again. Today. No matter what."
Karen: Like you chose Dad. Or Dutch.
Letitia: I chose both. And that was my mistake.

Andrea: I didn't come here to fight. Brian: Well then why did you come? Because the last time I checked, you dumped our son on my lap like a half-eaten sandwich and disappeared.

Nick: I have to talk to the press. I have to pick which magazine gets the photos. I have to make sure that the bride actually gets married. Lisa: That's a joke. Right? Nick: No, Letitia asked me to make sure Karen goes down the aisle. Apparently, she's having doubts. Cold feet.

Tripp: Patty, my boy!
Patrick: Patty, my boy?
Tripp: I believe that is an appropriate greeting.
Patrick: What the hell were you thinking?
Tripp: Lower your voice. I'm not deaf.
Patrick: You told Ellen about Carmelita?
Tripp: I did nothing of the sort. And I am offended that you would even think that I would do such a thing.
Patrick: Well, maybe that's because you hired a private investigator to follow me around and take photographs.
Tripp: I was trying to save your marriage. I love you, son. Whatever nonsense that's come between doesn't change that.

Nick: Are the photographers here yet? I asked them to get here early. Tripp: The vultures of the tabloids are in my office even as we speak.

Karen: Here we are again. Tripp: Here we are. You know there's a word for how I feel right now. Aware. Karen: Aware. Tripp: It's a Japanese word which means reverence for the transient beauty and mortality of all things.

Brian: And so Karen, Freddy, I send you off into the mystery of marriage with three words that start with the letter C. First, confirmation. Married people provide confirmation for each other. When one person sees a shooting star or an aurora, then they have someone to turn to all the time, to whom to which to say "Did you see that? Did that really happen". And in a life that's full of amazing moments, it's important to have confirmation. The second is consolation. Married people provide consolation for each other. When bad luck, death, or even the simple sadness of the passing of beauty becomes hard to make it go on, then you have someone to turn to for a hand, for an embrace, for a kiss, for consolation. And last but not least, there's joy. (mumbling from the guests) It's not a C word but then life and love are surprising. You may kiss the bride.

Kiki: So how it is being a Darling?
Brian Jr.: I'm pretty new with it. But I guess it's okay. Food's good.
Kiki: When I grow up, I'm going to live like this. No matter what it takes. No matter what.

Karen: Freddy? I never meant... Freddy: Karen, please. Don't feel sorry for me, okay? I feel sorry for you because you are a screwed-up little girl who has a thing for her lawyer. And no matter how hard you try to fight it, you are gonna die alone and unhappy and that's exactly what you deserve.

Nick: So you wanna tell me what really happened? Karen: He told me he loved me right after the ceremony. He just spit it out. Nick: And that wasn't good? Karen: I don't know.

Clark: That was a beautiful wedding day. Tripp: Karen finally got it right. I'll sleep well tonight knowing she has found a man's heart in which to make her home. Karen: Daddy, can I talk to you? Tripp: Oh, I think we might have set a record here.

Lisa: (on Karen getting married) So she actually went through with it. Nick:And then 45 minutes later, she got through with it.

Ellen: Do you love her?
Patrick: I love, uh, I love you both. I can't give her up. I've tried. I don't know how.
Ellen: Well then, we don't have a choice, do we? The three of us are going to sit down together and set some ground rules.
Patrick: The three of us? You and me and... you, me, and who?
Ellen: Carmelita. She won't destroy this marriage. And she will not keep us out of Washington. Either one of us. I didn't marry a Darling for nothing.

Tripp: (speaking of Simon Elder) I'm not a vengeful person Nick. I have endured massive betrayal, and I have responded with patience, and with love. But I will not suffer this man.
Nick: What do you wanna do?
Tripp: I want to destroy him. I want that s.o.b. completely and utterly destroyed.

Tripp: (Drunk) Brian, what a wonderful wedding sermon, so much humanity, so much hope. There really is such a kind person buried deep down inside you. Deep, deep down! Inside you... somewhere!?! Brian: Thanks dad.

Brian: (Speaking to a judge at the wedding) Well your Honor, the seven deadly sins are not like the Constitution, they can't be amended. So if I were you yes, I'd be worried!

Freddy: I wanna spend the rest of my life with you. (joyfully laughs)
Karen: (uncomfortably laughing) Oh, I ah, I wanna spend the rest of my life with you too baby. Forever!?!
Master of Ceremony: (as the elevator doors open up) Ladies and Gentlemen, may I present to you, Mr and Mrs Freddy Mason.
Karen: (whispering to Nick) I want a divorce. Now!

Brian: Why'd you even come back here?
Andrea: To see my son! And you... maybe... little...
Brian: (As he goes in to kiss her) Oh crap.

Letitia: Karen Darling, you are not going out there and announcing your divorce during your wedding. Karen: Of course, not. I would never ruin a party. Nick: Karen, you've been married for less than an hour. Is it possible...? Karen: I can tell when these things won't work out, Nick. I'm a pro.

Karen: Can I ask you a question? Nick: Sure. Karen: I don't think I'm gonna do this. Nick: Well, that's technically not a question. Karen: I know. I answered it myself.

Karen Darling: Hey! Have you pre-sold my wedding photos yet? Nick: No, not yet. Karen Darling: Well, don't settle for any less then two million. That would suck.

Brian: You're an evil person. You abandoned your son. Andrea: I didn't abandon him. I left him with his father for two months. Brian: And because you did, my marriage is probably over. My wife and children have been in China for two weeks and I don't know when or if they are coming back. Just as a little added bonus to your little selfish walk-about. Andrea: Well, look who's talking. You've never had a selfless moment in your life.

Juliet Darling: Private number? That's so 2006!

Tripp Darling: You look like you could use a drink. Nick: It's... 9:30 in the morning.

Freddy: Now baby, are you sure it's not bad luck to see each other on the big day?
Karen: Mm mm, who cares. That tradition has not exactly worked for me, in the past.