Downton Abbey Season 1 Episode 3

(Lady Mary wakes Anna, the Head Housemaid in the middle of the night after Mr. Pamuk has gone to her room.)

Lady Mary: He's dead! I think he's dead. No, I'm sure he's dead.

Anna: How?

Lady Mary: We were together and - he's dead.

Anna: In your room?

(Lady Mary nods, obviously extremely frightened)

Anna: We've got to get him back to his own bed.

Lady Mary: But how? It's in the Batchelor's Corridor, miles from my room!

Anna: Could we manage it between us?

Lady Mary: He weighs a ton! I could barely shift him at all!

(Miss O' Brien, Anna and Gwen are all peeping through a side door admiring the handsome Mr. Pamuk.)

Gwen: He doesn't look Turkish at all.

Anna: Well, he doesn't look like any Englishman I've ever met, worse luck. I think he's beautiful.

(Mr. Carson approaches the three women looking stern.)

Mr. Carson: Is there some crisis of which I am unaware?

Anna, O'Brien and Gwen: No, Mr. Carson.

Mr. Carson: I cannot think of another reason why you should congregate here.

Anna: No, Mr. Carson.

(All three women hurry off back to their duties, leaving Carson looking displeased.)

(Lady Mary is talking to Mr. Napier just before the start of the hunt. They are referring to the Turkish Attache, Mr. Kamul Permuk, who has not yet arrived to join them.)

Lady Mary: What about Mr. Pamuk? I gather if he takes a tumble, you'll be endangering world peace.

Mr. Napier: Don't worry about Kemal. He knows what he's doing on a horse.

Lady Mary: Well, where is he?

Mr. Napier: Fussing. He's rather a dandy.

Lady Mary: Well, I can see him now. Fussy little foreigner with a wide toothy grin and hair reeking of fermaise.

Mr. Napier: I wouldn't quite say that.

(Mr. Napier looks around.)

Mr. Napier: Here he is now.

(Lady Mary is stunned as they are approached by an extremely handsome young man on a horse. She finds herself lost for words as she sees how very attractive he is.)

Mrs. Crawley: (As she reads a letter from Cora) She asks if we can both dine on Saturday. There are two young men staying, so you won't be so outnumbered for once.

Matthew: What men?

Mrs. Crawley: A Turkish diplomat called something I can't read, and Lord Branxholm's charming son, who's to be flung at Mary, presumably.

Matthew: When it comes to Cousin Mary, she's quite capable of doing her own flinging, I assure you.

Mr. Bates: I saw this advertisement for a limp corrector. What does it do exactly?

Salesman: It corrects limps.

Mr.Bates: Does it work?

Salesman: Well, as I make it and I advertise it, is it likely I'd say no?