Ed

Shirley: Eggs don't come from the ass, per se.

Warren (to Peter): Just out of curiosity, is it that you can't paint a painting that looks like anything or is it that you just don't want to?

Carol (to Frankie): Once you do one of Ed's stupid things, you're officially one of the gang.

Frankie: A tear is welling up in my left eye, Leon. In about 3 seconds, it's gonna blow.

Mike (about outliving Ed): I don't know what I'm going to do those last 2 years without you.

Ed: I've only got 50 years left to live.

Molly: Like a guy named Leon could possibly hold onto a woman.

Nancy (after seeing Mike's art): What'd it take you, like 6 minutes?

Ed: Me, I'm a blip. I'm a blip, say hello, blip.

Phil: I'm not smoking, this is just for effect.

Warren: God I wish I was a wunderkind! If I could get the arts and leisure section of the New York Times to label me a wunderkind.

Warren (to Stella): Why don't you just go out with a paint brush, or sleep with an easel maybe?

Warren (to Stella): Warren... Cheswick... we almost did it that time... You offered to shine your love upon me...