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Molly (to Carol): What was going through that little blond head of yours when you decided not to tell him you're engaged?
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Ed: Tell me, Shirley, when did the world start going to hell?
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Warren (as he's refusing to practice the SATs): It's time to say "Pencil's Down!"
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Warren: That's why God put me here, assuming there is a God and he puts people places.
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Ed: I'm more graceful than most men.
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Molly (to Warren): Are you here to join us or are you going to strip naked and show us your number two pencil?
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Rich (after discovering his colon polyp is benign): Well, hello red meat and cigars!
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Warren: Listen, people! If we take this test, we're letting them rip into our chest and take out our soul and replace it with numbers. Oh, you're not Mark Vanacore! No, you're 420 verbal, 480 math!
Mark: If I'm very, very lucky.
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Ed: It just so happens I'm a bit of a jitterbug aficionado myself. Isn't that right, Mike?
Mike: Can't talk. Eating fried pie. Experiencing Nirvana.
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Eli: Where did you learn to do the jitterbug?
Ed: I rented Swingers. A couple of times. And Swing Kids. The one with rebellious dancing teenagers in Nazi Germany. It's like a Footloose... with Hitler.