Ed

Shirley (about Phil): I found his work ethic tiresome and vaguely threatening.

Shirley: It's getting really hot in here, so take off all your clothes.

Phil: Jennifer. Huh. How do these dancers come up with these names?

Phil: I thought, hmmmm, he must be Amish.

Mike: You hate that Carol's marrying him and he hates that Carol should be marrying you.

Mike: Could have been worse, she could've injected you with a serum that turned you into a gorgon.

Mike: I wonder if Nancy'd mind a sarcastic lap dance.