Ed

Nancy (on Mike's plan): Well, honey, you really think we can live on thirty-eight cents a month?

Mike (on how he and Nancy can earn money while they both stay home with Sarah): I figure I'll go downtown once a month, maybe work the hotel lobbies, sell my body to aging divorcees.

Warren: If you let me inside, I will take you on a journey of pleasure. Bite the forbidden apple, Carmela. You will find it sweet.

Shirley: Ed, one of the goals I have set for myself as your legal assistant is to make sure that when you are drinking coffee, and you finish the coffee, your cup is refilled with more coffee.

Mike: Hey buddy, if Nancy wants to throw a hot babe my way, let's not interfere with that!

Carmela: I vote for Dubya because Gore is so stiff, like a piece of wood. I hear that on the talk shows.