Eli Stone

Maggie: You're an object of ridicule, a professional pariah, reduced to barely practicing law. Eli: Thank you, I feel better. Maggie: You're sucking up to God. There are better ways. Eli: Yeah, well, God and I enjoy a pretty complicated relationship. At least now I'm starting to believe in what He wants me to do. (pauses) It's like I see things now, you know. Things that were always there but that I just never noticed before. Maggie: Like people who need help?

Maggie: My suggestion: go find another peon to pee on.

Jordan: Flattery and judicious use of loopholes: clearly you know the way to my heart.

Eli: Sir, you have to tell Solinsky that I'm unavailable... tell him anything... tell him I got hit by a bus. Jordan: Even if I got to drive it, I couldn't do that...

Eli: Nate, the knight was you. An hour ago, you were chasing a dragon down Fossil Street on horseback. Nathan: An hour ago I was here, asleep, and my horse hasn't been ridden all night.

Maggie: (leaving the courtroom) Was that as big a disaster as I thought it was? Eli: No... it could still be going on.

Eli: You should meet this kid. He's all alone. It's tragic... really. Maggie: It is... to those of us actually interested in helping people. Eli: I am interested in helping people. Maggie: Only because you're afraid of dying and you're trying to suck up to god.

Peter Johnson: Mr. Stone? (introducing himself) ... Peter Johnson. Eli: Junior? Peter Johnson: Sorry... if I told your assistant I was 15 and wanted you to represent me, I don't think you would have shown up. Eli: (sarcastically) Only because I don't practice 'pediatric' law. Peter Johnson: I googled you... big settlements, big judgements... your name is all over the law blogs. You're exactly the kind of lawyer I need. Eli: So... What's the case? You're suing the school cafeteria to put french fries back on the menu? Peter Johnson: My mom died...