ER

(dispatch is asking if they're available, but the paramedics won't respond because they're about to time out; Abby grabs the radio) Abby: (to dispatch) Then put us on the call. Dispatch: Paramedic 6, you're assigned to the incident. Who is this? Abby: Abby Lockhart. I'm the doctor on board, and we're responding. (the paramedic gives her a hard look) Darling, it's the job!

Pratt: Surprise, surprise! You all get me instead of Morris tonight. He begged me to switch so he could spend time with his kids. That's why I'm here. What's your excuse?

Weaver: All right; how do you stay so skinny and eat so much? Courtney: Uh, look who's talking, little skinny mini. Pratt: Well, it seems like good genes to me. Courtney: You want to come over and watch some football with me and Kerry tomorrow? Pratt: (whispering to Weaver) Damn, you're lucky.

Pratt: When (pauses) did you know you were gay? Weaver: Are you coming out to me, Greg? Pratt: No, no, no, no. I came home and found my brother with another guy. Weaver: Really? Pratt: Yeah. He says he's just experimenting, that it's only a phase. Weaver: And what do you think? Pratt: I don't know. Can a straight guy go through a gay phase? Weaver: I think it's more likely that he's gay. Hey, and he's telling you what he thinks you want to hear. (Pratt grunts) Pratt: Okay, but for today, right, he's taking some hot girl from school to the family Thanksgiving. Now, if he was gay, why is he doing that? Weaver: I don't know your brother. I mean, I don't know what's going on in his head. But I do know that when I was that age, I brought a lot of boys home to meet my parents. Pratt: You did? Weaver: Hell, yeah. I mean, I was 30 before I faced up to being gay, but my life got a lot better once I did.

(As the ensemble sit down to Thanksgiving dinner Luka has brought in) Pratt: Alright! Let's give a toast to Dr. Kovac, or Chef Kovac as he wants to be called.

Luka: Americans are so sentimental about their holidays. Abby: Ha! This from a guy who celebrates Croatian Independence Day, Croatian State Day and something called Patriotic Gratitude Day.

(discussing Courtney Brown) Pratt: Who is that? Weaver: I just told you who she was. Pratt: Come on now, hook a brother up. Weaver: You know what? Your gaydar is terrible, even for a straight man. Pratt: Oh. Oh, well, you... You have excellent taste in women, Dr. Weaver. Weaver: Of course I do.

Gates: But really, must you look so hot all the time? Even when you wear this ridiculous hat. I can't concentrate, I can't even talk.