Season 2 Episode 4

East Meets West

Aired Thursday 9:00 PM Oct 06, 2003 on The WB



  • Trivia

  • Quotes

    • Ephram: (To himself) Kill me now.

    • Madison: (To Ephram) You wanna pretend to fire me again? Might make you feel better.

    • Nina: Who was that?
      Ephram: Oh, you mean Satan? New babysitter.

    • Bright: (To himself) Rick BALLsack.

    • Madison: I don't think you wanna do this.
      Ephram: Yeah, my heart's breakin'.

    • Harold: (To Linda) Why must everything in my office smell like feet?

    • Delia: (To Madison) Welcome to my world.

    • Harold: (To Linda) It sounds like a toilet running!

    • Madison: Your dad says you have something to say to me.
      Ephram: (blandly) I apologize (pause) Madison.
      Madison: Wow, thank you Ephram. That was very manly, have a carrot stick.
      (puts carrot stick in his mouth)

    • Nina: (to Ephram, referring to Madison) Who was that?
      Ephram: Oh you mean Satan? That's Delia's new babysitter. I basically hate her.

    • Andy: I think I am a pretty good judge of people.
      Ephram: Yeah? Like that maid you hired back in Manhattan that stole all the silverware?

    • Andy: You told me, and it's real. You'll tell people when you're ready; when this doesn't hurt so much anymore.
      Nina: When will that be?

    • Nina: (To Andy) Carl's not just on a business trip this time. He left me.

    • Nina: (To Andy) He wasn't just having an affair; he was having an affair with a man.

    • Andy: (To Nina) Okay, I did something.

    • Andy: Come on Nina, I'm sorry.
      Nina: Sorry for what? Sorry for telling Ephram or completely bailing on me the other day? Or maybe you're sorry for pushing me into Divorce Court when I may not be ready for all that yet.

    • Nina: (To Andy) You're super at giving advice, but you're not so big on the follow through I've noticed.

    • Nina: (To Andy) Jim Hart didn't ask for your help. God, you can be so self-righteous sometimes!

    • Nina: Well don't be. I decided to wait on the whole finaling thing.
      Andy: But you... well, that's your decision and I completely support it.

    • Ephram: How stupid's miniature golf?"
      Amy: Yeah, it kinda loses most of it's appeal after the age of 10.

    • Amy: I can't believe this. You are saving my life right now.
      Ephram: Don't worry about it.
      Amy: Thank you so much. I won't forget this.

    • Harold: Weren't you two friends?
      Bright: We were, back when he knew his place.
      Amy:Oh please. Since when aer you the King of Jock Mountain?

    • Bright: (To Amy) Rick BALLsack.

    • Madison: Oh cool, my brother reads comic books too.
      Ephram: Oh, actually they're not comic books. It's Manga. Big difference.
      Madison: Anyway, he collects the dolls and all that stuff. Spiderman, The Hulk, he loves Samson Storm from X-men. He's 12, it's really cute. Do you have any?
      Ephram: No, no dolls.
      Delia: Yes you do, you have that guy with the red hair that you won't let me play with.
      Ephram: That's not a doll, Delia. That's a collectible.

    • Andy: Multi-tasking again I see.
      Ephram: Sine, cosine... algebra's got nothing on how useless this stuff is.

    • Andy: I've got to run out to the Dudley's for a house call. The four youngest have Strep. I'm trying to avoid a major epidemic.
      Ephram: If this town ever gets SARS, it'll start with the Dudleys.

    • Ephram: (Reads his essay silently for himself and out loud for the audience) The more things change, the more they stay the same. I'm not sure who the first person was who said that. Probably Shakespeare. Or maybe Sting. But at the moment, it's the sentence that best explains my tragic flaw: my inability to change. I don't think I'm alone in this. The more I get to know other people, the more I realize it's kind of everyone's flaw. Staying exactly the same for as long as possible, standing perfectly still... it feels safer somehow. And if you are suffering, at least the pain is familiar. Because if you took that leap of faith, went outside the box, did something unexpected... who knows what other pain might be out there, waiting for you. Chances are it could be even worse.

      So you maintain the status quo. Choose the road already traveled and it doesn't seem that bad. Not as far as flaws go. You're not a drug addict. You're not killing anyone... except maybe yourself a little.

      When we finally do change, I don't think it happens like an earthquake or an explosion, where all of a sudden we're like this different person. I think it's smaller than that. The kind of thing most people wouldn't even notice unless they looked at us really close. Which, thank God, they never do.

      But you notice it. Inside you that change feels like a world of difference. And you hope this is it. This is the person you get to be forever... that you'll never have to change again.

  • Notes

  • Allusions

    • Kobe Bryant:

      When Ephram's teacher asks the class for an example of a tragic flaw, one of the students says, "Kobe Bryant and room service."

      This is a reference to Kobe Bryant's arrest in the summer of 2003 after sexual assault allegations by a Colorado hotel employee.

    • Delia: The doll with the red hair you won't let me play with."
      This could have been a reference to the anime Rurouni Kenshin which features a swordsman with a shock of bright red hair pulled up into a rather bushy ponytail. At least, that was the one that sprang immediately to mind for me.