Ms. Morello: Chris, we have an uneven number of boys and girls in our class so I thought I'd make you a single father. I know it's something you can relate to with your childhood and all. Chris: I have a father. Ms. Morello: I know Chris. If only your Mom knew his name.
Jennifer: You're overbearing and clingy, and if you keep it up, you're gonna be a single father, too! Chris: (narrating) 20 years later, that's what Greg's mail-order bride said.
Chris: (narrating) It seemed like everyone else had advice for raising a baby. Kill Moves: You need to teach this boy how to protect himself. Now, I suggest the Brazilian two-finger neck snap! Want me to show you how it works? Mr. Omar: Teach the baby to honor the mother and the father, and if the father should meet a tragic death, the baby shouldn't be upset if the mother makes friends with a nice man. Woman: (off-screen) Omar, I need more bubbles! Mr. Omar: Gotta go. Risky: Teach this baby the difference between the knock-offs and the real thing. For instance, "Gucci" does not have an "H" in it.
Rochelle: Are you ready for your big report? Chris (narrating): No, I was ready to have egg on my face.
(Chris gets a brown egg to care for) Ms. Morello: They're all the same on the inside. Chris (narrating): Except my egg's gonna get pulled over by the police more.
Ms. Morello: If you crack, break or eat your baby, you will get an F. Chris (narrating): Okay, but if my egg misbehaves, can I beat it?
Chris (narrating): I was so scared of bringing home babies that to this day my mother hasn't seen my kids.
Music in tonight's episode: Papa Don't Preach by Madonna Talking in Your Sleep by The Romantics
Chris: What you talkin' 'bout Monk? This is a reference to the character Arnold Jackson's famous line from Diff'rent Strokes, a sitcom that aired from 1978 to 1985. The line was actually "What you talkin' 'bout Willis?" Jackson was played by Gary Coleman.
Chris: (narration) It's better than what I was thinking of, the incredible, edible baby. This is a reference to the slogan and ad campaign, "The Incredible Edible Egg," by the American Egg Board.
Chris (narrating): At least I didn't dangle my egg over a balcony like Michael Jackson! Michael Jackson was widely criticized in 2002 after being photographed dangling his infant son over the railing of a fourth-floor hotel balcony. His son is named Prince Michael II and nicknamed Blanket.
Drew: I was watching that! Julius: I've seen it, Rosebud's his sled. Apparently Drew was watching the 1941 film Citizen Kane, in which Charles Foster Kane says, "Rosebud," before he dies and everyone tries to figure out what he meant. Julius just gave away the movie's ending.
Rochelle(walking away from Julius) Kilowatts. Chris Mom thought Kilowatts was a riot in the 60's. This is an allusion to the riots in 1965 Los Angeles in the Watts neighborhood.
(02:44)
(01:47)
(01:22)
(02:32)
S 4 : Ep 22
Aired 5/8/09
S 4 : Ep 21
Aired 5/1/09
S 4 : Ep 20
Aired 4/24/09
S 4 : Ep 19
Aired 4/3/09
User Score: 183
User Score: 1182
User Score: 700
User Score: 609
User Score: 216
User Score: 136
User Score: 86
User Score: 58
User Score: 53
User Score: 50