Just minutes after returning from her honeymoon with Robert, Amy gets into an argument with Marie over writing thank-you notes for the wedding. Feeling guilty, Amy wants to make amends, but Debra quickly steps in with an opinion that horrifies the guys.
Raymond Albert Barone
At the beginning of the episode, when Ray and Debra are struggling to get the kids off to school, one of the twins is missing a shoe. Ray finally finds it after they have left for the bus, and he tries catching up with them, but he is unsuccessful. Is this to say that the kid was sent to school with only one shoe? That doesn't sound very responsible.
Debra: (about Marie) You can't let her get away with anything!
Amy: But she's so upset. I don't want a bad relationship with her. I should go over and apologize.
Debra: No, no, no, no, no! That is exactly what she is waiting for—for you to go over there and say you'll write those thank-you notes. You have got to be strong. She is testing you. Trust me... what she just pulled in here, that's her big weapon--the guilt bomb! And it doesn't help that all the men in her family are scared to death of her!
Marie: I don't know what you're talking about, Debra, but could it be that you're jealous because you have to share the spotlight with Amy?
Debra: (stunned) J-j-jealous? JEALOUS?!?!?!?
(Robert takes a big gulp of something from a bottle, then hands it to Ray, who also drinks some)
Ray: What is this?
Robert: Vanilla extract.
Marie: What have I done to bring on such disrespect? You know, in the Orient, elders are revered and honored, not plotted against. And why do you have to talk about me behind my back? I'm here--right here. Debra, we may have our differences, but I consider you my daughter. And Amy, all I want is for you to feel the same way. I just don't understand why you couldn't be direct with me. You may not like what I said, but at least I said it to you.
Amy: Debra, stop it. I can't take all of this. I'm not used to it! I'm not good at it! I come from a family that wouldn't yell if they were on fire!
Marie: (about the thank-you notes) I have to tell you, Amy, I'm a little upset and disappointed.
Amy: And I have to tell you, Marie... I really don't care about this right now.
Debra: (about Marie) And if she offers to do your laundry—
Amy: Just say no?
Debra: Unless you want her to tell everyone what size underwear you have at dinner parties!
Amy: (after fighting with Marie) I don't understand. What happened?
Debra: Aw, honey.....you married into the Manson family, and Charlie goes off sometimes.
Amy: I don't want to argue. I mean, it's thank you notes. It's so stupid!
Debra: Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. Look at me. You were great!
Frank: This is the most thoughtful gift I've ever received.
Marie: What is it, Frank?
Frank: A piece of shrapnel!
Marie: After all, Ray brought something to my attention...
Debra: (turns to Ray slowly) Where did you just come from?
Ray: I just went to the bathroom.
Debra: No, you didn't
Ray: I'm doing it now
Amy: You know, I think Ray was right before when he said we should just all try being nice.
Debra: (thinking) She's gone
Ray: (to Debra about Marie) You are so nuts. After 15 years, you still haven't figured out a thing about this woman? Amy, Amy, Amy, let me tell you how I see this whole thing. Mom loves the family--she really does. And she feels it's her job to hold it all together. Does she overreact occasionally? Okay... so she wants you to write a few thank-you notes. Come on, she's an old lady, what else does she have? Besides, before giving up one drop of power, she will truly kill us all.
Marie: So, Amy, when can I tell the people to expect their thank-you notes?
Amy: Well... can I be honest with you, Marie?
Marie: Of course! You can say anything to me--we're family!
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