This is one of my favorite episodes of the series. Marie shows up telling Ray & Debra about Mrs. Caputo (a family friend) passing away just as Bernie & Linda Gruenfelder arrive. That prompts Marie to talk about how she picked Rose to replace her as Frank's wife if she died before him because Frank can't even boil an egg for himself. Marie starts talking about the funeral & Ray asks if it's an open casket funeral. Just then, Frank starts with his comments on how Mrs. Caputo wasn't the best looking woman and says he would never shack up with Rose Caputo. Things start getting funny as Marie wonders who Frank would pick for himself and correctly guesses the infamous Harriet Lichmann (who was initially revealed as Marie's bridge partner several seasons before). Frank pulls Marie chain by repeatedly bringing up Harriet & how she's not disgusted by him.
Later on in bed, Debra wants Ray to tell her who he would choose to replace him should he die. Ray is not in the mood for playing the "replacement picking" game, saying that it's Marie's way of controlling Frank from the grave. Debra tells Ray that she would pick Linda Gruenfelder for Ray in case she dies first & when she catches Ray smiling, she accuses him of picturing Linda naked. Ray then tells her that he would pick Bernie as his replacement & when Debra shows signs of not being satisfied with his pick, Ray accuses her of being judgmental of Bernie's weight. They go to bed angry & stop playing the game.
The next morning they apologize to each other after Ray has trouble opening up the milk, which is pretty funny as Ray starts acting like the milk company people who glue the cartons shut. Ray starts the game again by suggesting Robert as his replacement & Debra wants to stop playing the game again. Debra's jealous due to Ray picturing Linda naked the previous night, so she cancels their night out together with Bernie & Linda by lying to Ray. She tells him that Linda called & told her Bernie was up with a stomach flu, sleeping on the bathroom floor. After Ray leaves, Debra calls Linda & lies to her that Ray was up all night with a stomach flu & slept on the bathroom floor.
The next scene is by far the funniest & takes place at Rose Caputo's funeral. Robert & Amy are shown speaking to George Caputo (Rose Caputo's husband) and Robert tells him how she used to always give him a bigger piece of pie than Raymond. Then it cuts to Frank & Marie where Frank is continuing with his insults on Rose Caputo after looking at a photo of her. Just then, Harriet Lichmann shows up to make her first appearance after several mentions in previous seasons. After she greets Robert, Frank hears her voice & slowly turns around to have a hilariously sinister grin while Marie comments on Harriet's clothes & turns Frank around. Then we get a shot of Raymond with Debra talking to George Caputo & just as Robert is passing by with Amy, Ray tells George how Mrs. Caputo always gave him an extra piece of pie to take home, leaving a dumbfounded look on Robert.
After Frank & Marie talk to George Caputo, Linda & Bernie show up, catching Debra off guard. This is when Debra's lies about Ray & Bernie start to bite her in the ass since Ray thought Bernie was sick & vice versa. Debra tries to change the topic to Mrs. Caputo. We get another shot of Marie telling George about Mrs. Caputo giving Ray & Robert pieces of pie when they were kids and she adds that she told Mrs. Caputo that it was OK to give Ray an extra piece of pie to take home. This catches Robert's attention and he gives Marie his usual "Ray favoritism" look. Harriet Lichmann greets George and Frank greets Harriet with Marie looking on angrily.
The camera shifts back to Bernie & Linda who are with Ray & Debra. They see George free & start walking towards him when Ray finally tells Bernie that he thought he was sick & Bernie says the same to Ray. Debra's lie gets exposed and Bernie gets insulted about Debra lying about him sleeping on the bathroom floor. This is when things get really funny as Debra is caught in one of those situations that Ray usually gets caught in, but when it happens with Debra it's funnier since it shows that she's just as bad as Ray. But it goes further. Ray figures it out that Debra lied because she was jealous of Ray & Linda and he tells Bernie & Linda about how Debra chose Linda as her replacement should she die before Ray. Debra tells Bernie that Ray had a stupid look on his face & Bernie correctly guesses that he was picturing Linda naked and says that all guys picture women naked. Linda then asks Bernie if he pictures Debra naked & he tells her "no more than you picture Ray naked". Debra then says she would never picture Bernie naked & Bernie counters by saying it's due to his weight. Ray tells Bernie he picked him for Debra as his replacement but she didn't want him. Debra objects loudly & Robert tells them to quiet down.
Now Robert & Amy get sucked into the conversation as things start unraveling more. Bernie & Linda bring Robert & Amy up to speed about what they were talking about (future spouses). Robert asks them if Debra even considered him as Amy is standing right next to him, much to her dismay. Ray tells him that she shot Robert down as well, to which Amy loudly asks "What's the matter with Robert?". The funeral director tells them to quiet down. Now we get a shot of Marie telling Harriet Lichmann to stay away from Frank and in front of Harriet she accuses Frank of picturing Harriet naked.
Finally we get to the funniest moment of the episode. Frank tells Marie to get out of his head. Marie responds by telling Frank she could care less about his fantasies & that Frank will never find himself with Harriet. And to that, we get by far the most over-the-top & most publicly humiliating line every said by Frank---"I don't care how many plans you make, I wouldn't be caught dead with Rose Caputo" as he's standing right next to George Caputo. At this point, Harriet's eyes are opened wide & she's covering her mouth in shock. George also has a shocked expression. Just then, Frank (who has the look of the cat that swallowed the canary), Marie, Amy, Robert, Linda, Bernie, Debra, and Ray all file out of the funeral home one by one with their heads hung low.
The closing scene shows Robert & Amy playing the future spouse game in the funeral home corridor & Robert tells Amy that he picked Ray as his replacement. Amy doesn't sound too thrilled & Robert loves her anti-Raymond reaction.
What I really loved about this episode is how not only the Barones, but the Gruenfelders too got sucked in to the usual craziness seen on the show. It was also cool how we finally got to see Harriet Lichmann. But the thing that made the episode was the volcanic eruption that was Frank's line & how it cleared everyone associated with the future spouse game from the funeral home. I also love it when Debra is the troublemaker since it doesn't happen often, but it shows how she & Ray belong together. That's the reason why I love the episode The Faux Pas, Liars, The Skit, Favors, Snow Day and various others so much (my favorite episode is probably Baggage though).moreless
Episode Summary
EDIT
Debra and Ray pick out replacement spouses for each other and jealousy starts. Marie announces that Rose, the elderly lady next door, has passed away. Marie is upset because Rose is the woman she'd chosen for Frank if she hadn't died. Debra thinks it would be fun to fantasize about who should take her place and tells Ray she's selected her friend Linda. But then Ray picks Linda's husband Bernie for Debra.moreless
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GUEST STAR
Renata ScottHarriet Lichmann
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GUEST STAR
Joe DurrenbergerGeorge Caputo
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Ray Romano
Raymond Albert Barone
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Patricia Heaton
Debra Barone
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Brad Garrett
Robert Barone
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Doris Roberts
Marie Barone
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Peter Boyle
Frank Barone
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Madylin Sweeten
Ally Barone
Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions
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TRIVIA (0)
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QUOTES (15)
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Robert: (about picking someone to replace Ray) Did Debra even consider me? Amy: Hey, I'm standing right here!
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Robert: So, who would you pick for me? Amy: Robert, I don't wanna do this. Robert: Come on, it'll be fun. Amy: We're not even married yet and you wanna know who can replace me? Robert: I picked someone to replace me. Amy: Oh, yeah? Who? Robert: Well, what about Raymond Amy: (disguested face) Ray? Robert: Ahh, that's my girl!
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Marie: (to Harriet) You stay away from my husband! Frank: Marie, we were just talking. Marie: You weren't just talking, you were picturing her naked. Frank: Get out of my head, Woman!
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Debra: By the way Linda called this morning. She had to cancel the date tonight. She said Bernie was up all night with a terrible stomach flu. He slept on the bathroom floor. Raymond: Stomach flu? Well that's a lot of flu with that stomach.
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Raymond: (trying to get the milk open) C'mon. Are you kidding me? You gotta glue it on tight, huh, milk people? 'Ooh, look at me, I work for the milk company. I glue things on tight.'
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Raymond: There's no reason you shouldn't be attracted to Bernie except for all the extra Bernie.
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Debra: The kids preschool teacher. Raymond: What?! She's gotta be 65 years old. She's old enough to be my mother. Debra: Yeah, I thought you'd like that.
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Marie: By the way, the viewing hours are the next three nights at the Canazarol's funeral home. Raymond: Oh, is it going to be an open casket? Frank: For Rose Capoodle, I hope not!
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Linda: Did Mrs. Capoodle know that you picked her for Frank? Raymond: If she did then it would have killed her sooner.
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Raymond: Hey dad, Bernie and Linda are here for dinner so why don't you go home and yell at your own TV? Frank: What are you having? Raymond: We're having a big bowl of "get out of my house old man"!
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Frank: (looking at the picture beside the coffin) Is this picture before or after?
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Frank: I don't care how many plans you make for me, I wouldn't be caught dead with Rose Caputo!
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Debra: Who would you pick for me if you died first? Ray: And you say I'm bad at foreplay.
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Marie (to Frank): Years ago I decided to pick someone to replace me if I died before you. Frank: What do you mean? To marry me? Marie: Yes! Someone to make you happy after I was gone! Frank: Oh, that's nice, Marie, but.. I think I'd be happy enough.
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Marie: Guess who died. Debra: Aw, Marie! Who? Marie: Guess! Ray: Mom! Nobody wants to play this game! Frank: Celebrity or real person? Marie: A real person. Frank: Male or female? Marie: Female. Frank: Gimme a second here, I'm usually pretty good at this.
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NOTES (1)
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Ironically enough, Maggie Wheeler was one of the actresses considered to play Ray's wife, Debra, when the show was originally cast.
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ALLUSIONS (0)
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Hank McDougall
04/22/1210
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Who is funnier, Ray, Frank, Robert, Marie, or Debra?
03/20/126
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What past sitcoms do you miss the most
01/27/1221
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Only just found the love for Raymond ...
01/27/126
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Bad Role Model
03/03/114
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Boob Job
S 4 : Ep 1
Aired 9/20/99
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Robert Moves Back
S 3 : Ep 25
Aired 5/17/99
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Dancing with Debra
S 3 : Ep 24
Aired 5/10/99
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