Much to my disappointment, "What on Earth Is Wrong?" did not spend much time on the sea freighter Extant boarded last week, so I wasn't able to use "I'm On a Boat" as the title of this review, which I really, really wanted to do. But that's okay, because "What On Earth Is Wrong" presented me with another gift: A whole pile of questions! Let's get right down to them...
7. When are we going to learn WHY Sparks and ISEA are so interested in this space baby?
Molly's lab dude hit on a key discovery this week when he Instagram-filtered the Seraphim's security footage and found that new energy frequency or whatever it was, but other than showing Molly that she was "visited" by some invisible magic waves, what did it tell us that's useful? We already knew Molly got pregnant in space. We already knew that Sparks and ISEA knew that Molly got pregnant in space and that they had something to do with it. And now we… sorta know HOW she got pregnant. But why do we care?
ALSO: Why did the invisible magic waves kill all the worms? BECAUSE THAT IS THE GREATEST MYSTERY.
6. Why are there still customer satisfaction surveys in the future?
You know what I'm talking about. You go to Kohl's to buy some cheap but totally cute new clothes, and after you've handed over your credit card to pay, the cashier gives you a receipt that says you can call a phone number and answer a survey about your visit in exchange for a discount or a chance to win something. Guess what? Barely anyone fills out those surveys. Most people hate those surveys. Thus, they can't yield that much positive feedback, which means that by some law of science they should die out in the future. Except nope! As soon as Joshua Malina's doctor guy (Joshua Malina, why are you on this show?) left the hospital room, the giant screen asked Molly and John to answer a survey about their visit. What's the point of setting a show in the future if it's still going to feature the same annoying stuff from the present?
5. Really? The dog bite? That's Molly's magical answer to proving she was pregnant?
Last week, Molly was bitten by her father's dog because the dog was smart enough to smell her alien baby from a mile away and recognize danger. This week, after discovering that the ISEA and Sparks straight up baby-snatched that alien from her womb and Sam acted like Molly was a crazy person, Molly realized that the towel she'd used to staunch the bleeding was still at her dad's house, and she could use that to prove she'd been pregnant. Come on, Molly, really? That's what you're going with? Plus, if Molly's blood didn't show any evidence of pregnancy hormones when she was in the hospital, what made her think there'd be any on that dried up dirty towel? Maybe the alien baby didn't require any pregnancy hormones in the first place! Unless we actually get to see what Sparks saw when he messed with Molly's DIY test results in her dad's garage, I'm not buying Molly's logic.
4. Is John in on the conspiracy?
Look, I know it appears that John is currently the one and only card-carrying, non-Molly member of Team Molly Is Not Crazy, but what if he's not? Maybe I'm paranoid, but this show is about alien babies and robotic children, so why shouldn't I be paranoid? What if John is in on the whole thing? Not only does he have unparalleled access to Molly, but he seems to be taking things remarkably well for a dude whose astronaut wife believed she was secretly impregnated with his sperm while in outer space. I don't think the idea that there's more to John than meets the eye is completely outside the realm of possibility.
3. WTF is the baby? Alien? Human? Hybrid?
At the end of the episode Sparks asks what the baby is, and the guy in the lab cheekily replied that it's a boy. But is the boy human? It is alien? Is it a human/alien hybrid? It looked pretty human, albeit human with a few too many umbilical cords. What do you think?
2. What happened to Julie's legs?!
It's clear that the 60 seconds Extant spent on Julie's personal life this week were supposed to give us a glimpse into A) why we should care about her, B) why she's so wrapped up in Ethan, and C) show off some cool futuristic technology. But her shower scene was a bit too heavy on the "Lieutenant Dan! You got new legs!"—it didn't exactly leave me thinking, "Ah, yes, I now understand Julie on a deeply psychological level." Plus, I initially thought she was just lazy. I mean, I get it—who hasn't wanted to sit down in the shower?—but ultimately I feel like the episode should've devoted more time to Ethan instead. And speaking of the little guy...
1. What does all of this mean for Ethan?
RoboKid's been rebooted after being cattle-prodded by those jerks last week, which obviously means something has changed within him. And you just KNOW that Extant is going to use the "came back wrong" trope. But what does that mean? Will Ethan's hatred for birds be even stronger? Will he upgrade to murdering humans? Maybe he'll stop murdering altogether? Only time will tell, but if he isn't leading a robot uprising by the end of the season, I'm going to be super disappointed.
What did you think of "What On Earth Is Wrong"? What new questions do YOU have for Extant?
AIRED ON 9/17/2014
Season 1 : Episode 13