F Troop

Agarn: (pretending to be Dmitri) With cooking like this, you could go far in Russia. All the way to Siberia!

Agarn: (pretending to be Dmitri) Did you make the borscht? I can't smell it. Wrangler Jane: It's in the basket. Agarn: If you can't smell borscht, it stinks!

Agarn: (pretending to be Dmitri) Just like my mother used to make! And my father used to throw it right out the window!

O'Rourke: I know your game. You're just trying to make Captain Parmenter jealous. Wrangler Jane: Well, now, what makes you think I'm not serious about Dmitri? O'Rourke: Because I know women. Wrangler Jane: Well, if you know women, how come you're not married? O'Rourke: Because I know women.

O'Rourke: (to a jealous Parmenter)Maybe you ought to explain to the colonel, sir, that Wrangler Jane is your fianceé. Capt. Parmenter: Well, there's no point in explaining it to the colonel when I never really explained it to Jane.

Agarn: The life of a horse soldier is pretty tough. Drilling the men, keeping the horses clean. Then there's the dusty trail. O'Rourke: What dusty trail are you talking about? You spend most of your time sleeping in your bunk. Agarn: I know that, Sarge. But when I sleep, I keep my windows open and a lot of dust from the trail blows in.