Family Guy

Season 9 Episode 9

And I'm Joyce Kinney

3
Aired Sunday 9:00 PM Jan 16, 2011 on FOX
6.0
out of 10
User Rating
183 votes

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Episode Summary

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Lois becomes friends with Joyce Kinney, the new local news anchor. Lois admits a secret to her, and Joyce uses it for a television story, that makes Lois look terrible. Joyce is unapologetic, leaving Lois no choice but to right a wrong.

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Today
2:30am
TOON
2:00pm
TBS
2:30pm
TBS
11:30pm
TOON
Friday
2:30am
TOON
3:00am
TOON
2:30pm
TBS
10:00pm
TOON
10:30pm
TOON
Saturday
1:30am
TOON
2:00am
TOON
Seth MacFarlane

Seth MacFarlane

Peter Griffin, Brian Griffin, Stewie Griffin, Announcer & Tom Tucker

Alex Borstein

Alex Borstein

Lois Griffin

Seth Green (I)

Seth Green (I)

Chris Griffin

Mila Kunis

Mila Kunis

Meg Griffin

Mike Henry (VI)

Mike Henry (VI)

Consuela

Helen Reddy

Helen Reddy

Herself

Guest Star

Alec Sulkin

Alec Sulkin

Various

Recurring Role

Chris Sheridan

Chris Sheridan

Various

Recurring Role

Danny Smith (IV)

Danny Smith (IV)

Various

Recurring Role

Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions

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  • TRIVIA (0)

  • QUOTES (8)

    • Priest: Let me remind you all that this Saturday at 5:00 p.m., we'll have vespers, not to be confused with the Italian motor scooter.
      (Everyone laughs, Lois laughs longer)
      Lois: (laughing) Vespers!
      Priest: And don't forget, next weekend, we will have the Sunday afternoon family picnic--as God said to Noah--weather permitting.
      (Everyone again laughs, Lois laughs longer)
      Lois: (laughing) Stop it!
      Priest: And another reminder: When you arrive to mass, please do not park behind the rectory. As the Corinthians said to the Galatians, "That's my land."
      (Again everyone laughs, Lois laughs longer)
      Lois: (laughing) Oh, ho, ho! Look out, Gallagher!
      Peter: Stop kissing ass!

    • Lois: Oh, Father, your homily was so moving today.
      Priest: Thank you, Lois. And thank you for the great job you did with the rummage sale for the needy last weekend.
      Lois: Oh, it was my pleasure. You know, I accidentally almost put a cashmere sweater in there. Can you believe? (chuckles) What would one of them do with a cashmere sweater?
      Priest: You know, Lois, we also have a bake sale coming up, and we're short about eight pies.
      Lois: Well, I'll hit the grocery store this afternoon and get to work.
      Peter: (while slowly driving away) Okay, Lois, bye! Bye, church! Bye, church guy! Bye, unending conversation! Bye, terrible church people! Bye!

    • Lois: Excuse me, Miss Kinney? I don't mean to bother you, but my name is Lois Griffin. I-I am a huge fan, and I just think you are doing a fantastic job. And after what I went through with Diane Simmons, well, let me just say it's nice to be standing here with no one trying to murder me.
      Stewie: (while aiming a blaster at Lois) Yea, no, you're fine.

    • (After Joyce made a news story about Lois being in a porno)
      Lois: She totally betrayed me! I thought girlfriends were supposed to support each other.
      (Bonnie enters)
      Bonnie: HA! SLUT!

    • (After Lois explains how she got involved in a porn film)
      Stewie: Good Lord! Am I a porn baby?!

    • Student: Your mom's in a porno! I saw her boobs!
      Chris: Shut up!!
      Second Student: Hey, Griffin, your mom's a whore!
      Chris: Come on, guys, knock it off!
      Meg: Yeah, Griffin, your mom's gross and nasty!
      Third Student: Hey!
      Student: Not cool!
      Second Student: That's a dude's mom!
      Meg: Well...she's also my mom.
      Student: Aw, your mom's a whore!
      Chris: Yeah! Suck it! You're a whore's daughter!
      Second Student: Yeah, Griffin gets it!

    • Priest: Leave this house of God!
      Lois: But-but I love the church! It's an important part of my life!
      Priest: Maybe you should've thought of that before you made a porn.
      Lois: But, Father, I didn't mean... Wait. Did you say "a porn"?
      Priest: Yes.
      Lois: Oh. Well, that's kind of weird.
      Priest: Why?
      Lois: Well, I mean, you'd either say, "You made porn," or "You made a porno." Y-You don't say, "Made a porn." It just...It hits the ear wrong.
      Priest: Oh, God, have I been saying it wrong this whole time?
      (Two boys next to the priest nod)

    • Priest: (after watching Lois' porn film) I know I'm a man of God, but that sh*t is HOT!

  • NOTES (0)

  • ALLUSIONS (1)

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