Chris (and various)
Lois (and various)
Peter / Stewie / Brian / Quagmire / Tom Tucker (and various)
Meg (Production Season 1) [uncredited]
At the Picnic when Brian says "Some mysteries are better left unsolved." Bonnie Replies "Peter's got a point." Instead of "Brian's got a point."
In this episode Lois actually calls Joe's wife Bonnie 'Debbie'.
In the scene when Peter finds out that Stewie has been taken away, the picture of Stewie has an inverted shirt.
This episode reveals Quagmire's first name, Glenn.
The sign outside of the child services building reads Taking Your Children Away For Over 50 Years.
Cleveland: (to Joe) Pretty high and mighty for a man who left our nation's flag out in the rain last 4th of July. That's against the law, Officer!
(The adoptive parents are aiming a gun at Peter as he holds Stewie in front of himself)
Stewie: No! Don't shoot! (He wiggles out of his jumper and runs off as Peter is left holding his clothes) Now shoot!
Brian: It's amazing, Peter. You've inspired the whole neighborhood to work together.
Peter: You know what's really amazing? I haven't brushed my teeth in three days, and no-one has said a thing.
Peter: And Cleveland, you're the boss because of your attention to detail. Like when we play pool, you take so long to line up your shot that I just want to crack you with a cue stick. But I don't because that would be a hate crime and I love you.
Peter: You told them that we cheat on our taxes, steal lawn mowers, and worship some guy named Stan.
Bonnie: Actually I said Satan. That must have been a typo.
Joe: Peter wanted the trophy the most.
Peter: I couldn't have stolen the trophy. Last night I was stealing Joe's ladder so I could steal the trophy tonight.
Peter: What? It's a ladder, he's not gonna use it. That's like taking a watch off a dead guy.
(Stewie is in the foster home, and they won't give him pancakes)
Stewie: God! Do you people speak every language except english? Yo quiero pancakes! Done ma pancakes! Click click bloody click pancakes!
(After seeing the social worker give Mrs. Stevens back her baby)
Chris: So this is where babies come from?
Brian: Yes Chris, this is exactly where babies come from.
Chris (to Lois): You told me I came out of your vagina!
Stewie: What's that? Oh yeah. I love crack, I'm absolutly coo-coo for crack.
Peter: Oh I love you sweety. What are they like 10 bucks?
Meg: More like eleven...hundred.
Peter: Heh, you wished I loved you that much.
Meg: My life is ruined and it's all becuase of this stupid bag.
Peter: What did you do to my daughter, if you even touched her then I'm gonna.....
Lois: Calm down Peter.
(Searching for the stolen trophy)
Peter: That was then and this is now. And this is a chair. And that's a lamp. And you have boobies. And I'm gonna find that trophy!
Peter: Oh, you people can kiss the fattest part of my ass.
Stewie: I've got a better idea, let's go play 'swallow the stuff under the sink'.
Peter: Wait a minute! Meg, when did you become a teenager?
Lois: She's 16, Peter.
Peter: You knew about this?
Woman: I promise it will never happen again.
Child Services Worker: I hope not Mrs. Stevens, because next time we won't just take him away, we'll kill him.
Old Lady: What a precious little boy.
Meg: That's my ..uh, uh.. son.
Old Lady: Your son? But you're just a baby yourself. Henry, give the little skank a nice tip.
Lois: Excuse us. We're having a small problem with home security.
Peter: Do you guys have those round metal things that you bury in the ground, and when you step on them, they explode?
Sales Clerk: Land mines?
Lois and Peter: Land mines!
Peter: It was land mines.
Quagmire: Hey! Get the hell off my la- Well hello, lips, legs, breasts, and ass.
Stewie: Write this down, you toad-faced frump. I love pancakes.
Quagmire: Tuesdays in the '80s I was always in bed by 8:00 ... and home by 11:00, OH!
Peter: And Joe, I've had new neighbors before, but none of them were half the man you are, and since you're half a man already, that splits them into some kind of fraction I can't even measure.
Peter: I'd like to propose a toast to our neighbors. Sure they might be black, handicapped, and a heartless sex hound, but hey, if they moved out some smelly Hawaiians might move in.
Chris: (on the phone) So ..ah.. what are you wearing? Ha ha ha ha ha WOW! I bet you could see right through that.
Lois: Chris, who are you talking to?
Social Worker: (lying in bed) Mmm, Glenn honey, I have a question for you. What do you do for a living?
Quagmire: Hey, I have a question for you too. Why are you still here?
Rod Serling makes an appearance twice to introduce and sum up what is happening and what has happened to the characters. For fans of the Twilight Zone, they should remember that this episode is similar to The Monsters are Due on Maple Street
Stewie: Michael Flatley must be turning over in his grave...Wait a minute, he's not dead...yet!
Michael Flatley, famous male dancer, became principal choreographer and dancer for the show Riverdance in 1994. Flatley later started his own hit touring dance show, Lord of the Dance.
Charlton Heston: That episode of Who's the Boss? where Tony sees Angela naked in the shower?
This refers to the second episode of the 1984 sitcom Who's the Boss in which Tony Danza's character enters his employer's bathroom and catches her with towel open.
The United Colours of Benetton
Stewie: My God, I've been adopted by a Benetton ad!
Benetton, an expensive clothing store in the mid-1980's, had a series of commercial with children of many cultures in it.
The end credits show a scene with Stewie trying to kick his 'pancake' addiction. This is a direct reference to the scene from director Danny Boyle's movie adaptation of Irvine Welsh's novel, Trainspotting, where the main character, Renton, is trying to kick his heroin addiction. In the movie, Renton has a drug-induced hallucination of a baby crawling on the ceiling - in the episode, Stewie looks up and sees himself on the ceiling as the crawling baby.
The building blocks Stewie is playing with spell out the word REDRUM (murder spelt backwards), which is a reference to the Stephen King novel The Shining.
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