Lois (and various)
Meg (season 2+)
Chris (and various)
Peter / Stewie / Brian / Quagmire / Tom Tucker (and various)
Cleveland/Herbert/Performance Artist/Greased-Up Deaf Guy (and various)
During the scene where Brian lets Peter go with Jillian to Disney on Ice, the tag on Brian's collar briefly disappears in one shot and then returns in the next.
Stewie Griffin: That's right, I'm paying Mr. Lickety-Self's half of the rent.
Jillian: Is that true?
Brian Griffin: All right, yes, fine, it's true.
Jillian: Why didn't you say anything?
Brian Griffin: Because you wanted me to move in so badly, and God knows I didn't want to...
Jillian: Wait, you didn't wanna move in with me?
Brian Griffin: Well... honestly, no.
Jillian: Oh, my God! I've never felt so stupid!
Brian Griffin: Really?
Jillian: Well, I don't wanna be your guilty burden, Brian. We're through!
(Jillian grabs her clothes and leaves
Brian Griffin: Jillian, wait!
Brian Griffin: Damn it!
Stewie Griffin: I'm sorry, Brian. You'll feel better in the morning.
Stewie covers himself, then Brian turns the light out to go to sleep)
Stewie Griffin: Hey, you know what you should do? You should have sex with somebody else just to get back at her for walking out on you. Ju-just have sex with somebody. Anybody. Just don't-don't even think about it. The next person you see, the very next person you see.
(The light turns back on; Stewie is staring Brian dead in the face with a smirk on his face. Brian then punches him out of bed)
(Brian and Jillian are having sex)
Brian: Oh, yeah. You like that, huh?
Jillian: Yeah, it's rad!
Brian: Please don't talk.
Stewie: Meg, lend me twenty-five cents so I can ride the toy airplane outside and make the immigrant kids jealous.
Jillian: Brian, did you know that Daryl Hannah has one wooden finger?
Brian: Really? Where'd you read that?
Jillian: In Pee-opple Magazine.
(Jillian finds out Brian didn't actually want to move in with her)
Jillian: Oh my God, I have never felt so stupid.
Stewie and Brain: Really??
Lois: So Meg, any luck in finding another job?
Meg: No, hardly anybody is hiring right now. The only job I could find was for a phone sex line and I sucked at it.
(cuts to living room, Meg is on the couch talking on the phone)
Meg: What am I wearing? Um, a hat, and glasses. What kind of underwear? Um, I don't know, big underwear I guess. I'm sorry, what? Oh, what would I do to you? Well, um, I guess maybe we'd get pizza, and we could watch House?
(Cuts to Peter upstairs, also on the phone)
Peter: Alright, I am totally flaccid, but thank you anyway ma'am, I appreciate your time. (hangs up the phone)
Brian: She's gone. Jillian's gone.
Stewie: Look Brian, I know you're upset now, but I think it's important to see things in perspective. Remember when Alex P. Keaton lost his girlfriend, and then he got another one and everything was alright? And then he got Parkinson's...yikes.
Carl: Uh Chris, you ever see the movie Cruel Intentions?
Carl: Oh, Selma Blair and Sarah Michelle Gellar make out, it's pretty hot. Fourty-seven minutes, sixteen seconds in.
Chris: No way!
Carl: Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know what's another great movie? Career Opportunities with Jennifer Connolly. I mean, that's one of those movies that... I mean, she's really hot in it, but it's also a good movie.
Chris: She was in A Beautiful Mind, and I've got to say, the direction was excellent, but I was very disappointed that she, um, wore clothes the entire film.
Carl: Was she hot in it?
Chris: Yeah, in the way that like, classy women with expensive clothing, who never take them off are hot. Ya know?
Carl: (pauses) No.
Chris: Alright, so ya see a hot girl, and you're like "okay, I appreciate your exterior beauty, because you've definitely worked at it. With the clothing and the jewelry, and the makeup and stuff." But secretly, I'm just like "hey man, where is the chase, and how do I cut to it?"
Carl: Wow, you're smart.
Herbert: Well OshKosh B'gosh, it's a brand new paperboy. That's a mighty full sack you're carrying.
Stewie: Piss off you perverted old freak.
Herbert: Oh, we got a fighter.
Brian: (answers door) Stewie, hey, what's up?
Stewie: Oh, I was just on my way back from the cobbler. Figured before I stopped by the apothecary I'd come here, and then its off to the haberdasher. These turn of the century business jokes doing anything for ya?
Brian: Not really.
Seamus: (to Stewie, from down the hall) Did ya use the jokes?
Stewie: Yeah, they're not landing.
Stewie: Oh, Vince Vaughn is on the cover of Entertainment Weekly. Here's my summary of every Vince Vaughn movie: Oh, I'm incapable of loving another person. Oh wait, no I'm not. The end.
Carl: Hey, Meg.
Meg: Hey, Carl.
Carl: Why are you always here by yourself? Are you like a bitch or something?
In the Adult Swim and Canadian airings as well as the DVD release, there is additional footage after Brian's argument about what kind of guy he is that wasn't in the original version. An advertisement pops up at the bottom of the screen for The Simpsons featuring Marge. Eventually, Quagmire comes out and tries to have sex with her, but she fights him off and runs away, only to be heard off-screen enjoying it. At the end of the scene, Quagmire and Marge reappear, and she takes him back to her house, where Quagmire ends up killing all the members of the Simpson family.
During the episode Chris and his boss, Carl, make several references to actresses that are nude in different movies and give tell each other how far into the movie the nude scenes occur (i.e. she get's naked 39 minutes 30 seconds in). The website Mr. Skin.com informs users when nude scenes occur in the same way.
The title of the movie in the opening sequence is shown on the Lifetime Network. Lifetime is a network that is aimed at a Female audience. Often, made-for-TV movies are broadcast that are based on real-life events, where Women are abused by men.
Movin' Out (Brian's Song)
This is an allusion to the song Movin' Out (Anthony's Song) by Billy Joel. Also it is a reference to the made for TV movie Brian's Song, about Brian Piccolo, a football player for the Chicago Bears who falls terminally ill, and the bond that he establishes with his teammate Gale Sayers.
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