Family Matters

Grandma: You watch your tongue young man or I'll take you down.

Nick: Does this mean that dinner is off? Harriette: No, it's still on. But it's on you, Nick. (pours guacamole on him) Laura: Chips? (dumps chips on him)

Nick: Tea?! This is the kind of pain only booze can kill.

Piranha Member: You got my girl, Shantel, all wet. Steve: Well, she needed a shower.

3J: Angela, would you like to take a spin on the merry go round? Angela: Sure, as long as you're driving.

Nick: If you park that car by my curb again, I'll let their air out of your tires. Carl: If you touch my son's car, I'll let the air out of you!

Steve: That does it! Okay, okay, when they threw me in that basketball hoop, I shrugged it off. When they hung me up by my ankles and used me as a tetherball, I held my tongue. But when they start hurting little kids, thaaat's crossing the line!

Steve: The jungle gym is a great exercise. It tones the body, and it's good for you. Girl at the playground: 3J's body is already toned. 3J: Tell the world, sweet love!

Neighbor: And that's the way it's gonna be! Carl: (Getting in neighbor's face) That's the way it is!