Father Ted

This episode is classic Father Ted farce, and begins with what appears to be Father Ted's paranoid delusion about his arch-rival Rugged Island counterpart, the coach of the Rugged Island all priests over 75 football (soccer) team, planting a bug in the Craggy Island Parochial house and spying on Ted to learn his strategy.



But Ted's fears are well founded, and the rivalry is in full swing.



Even Mrs. Doyle gets into the act when she's given the book "Understanding Football for Women" (complete with romance novel cover) and eventually becomes an ESPN-worthy analyst on the match and a vocal part of the taunting all-female "hooligan" crowd.



Ted is forced to resort to desperate measures when his two star players are incapacitated, and the rival coach brings in a ringer from the Vatican to ensure a Rugged Island victory.



Best quotes from this episode:



Mrs. Doyle: "Sensini's got an open goal. If they don't do something soon, he'll score in a matter of minutes."



Ted: "You're carrying all of Craggy island on your shoulders."

Player: "ooh, me back."

Ted: "Metaphorologically"