Fifth Gear

Discovery Channel Premiered Apr 08, 2002 In Season





Fifth Gear Fan Reviews (15)

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out of 10
163 votes
  • I dug one of my eyeballs out with a spoon after watching this drivel.

    Where to start? The presenters....

    I reckon when they did the casting for this series they must have hauled Tiff and Plato in the office (a cafe?) and offered them a deal to present the whole show, Tiff and Plato said ok but for X amount. Hmmmm say the Channel 5 porducers, "Too exspensive. We'll have to get 2 muppets to sit on cars in a crummy studio making pointless snotty comments about cars they'll never own inbetween Tiff and Plato's cool sketches just to pad it out a bit. They'll have to be cheap as well, prefereably with no driving skill whatsoever. We'll never let them drive anything more exspensive that a Ford Ka anyway. Maybe we'll let them play with the Bang and Oulafson stereo in an Audi but that's it." They take a trip down the local dole queue in Staines or some other hole of a town and recruit Tom and Johny. Tiff and Plato take the deal to drive the mint cars and these plebs can fill in the gaps. "Nice work" say the producers to each other, "Champers for lunch?"

    Tom Ford.
    What a talentless freak. his snyde comments and sarcastic tone make my toes curl up when his mug in degrading my nice new Bravia, even the dog stays clear of me when these guys are on after nearly being thrown at the telly in anger. Even when Tom introduces the ad break he does it with contempt, what a tool. When they arent giving him some Kia peice of poo to rag around a car park, he's parked his massive 4rse on it in the studio because he cant be bothered to stand up for more than 3 minutes at a time. Me and my mates just want to hold the ape down and give him a damned good shave! Im glad he stacked his van and broke his foot, its just a shame he didnt smack his head and get some sense knocked into him.

    Tim Shaw.
    I think this guys missus sold his MR2 for 50p on ebay, good girl. She's got him sussed and if she thinks he's a tool, who am i to argue?

    Vicky Butlet Henderson.
    Eat something you rake! Dopey blonde thinks she can drive, she should be pole dancing in the background or something to take our minds off the nonces presenting this drivel. My mate went out with her, she's a nice enough girl but for gods sake woman, learn your place and get up that pole!

    I feel slightly better now.