Joshua is put on trial, and must defend himself against charges that he is a human sympathizer and a traitor to the gua. - - - No quatrain this week. Eddie and I are sifting through the database, checking some out, following up leads but we haven't discovered anything solid enough to head in. But that doesn't mean I haven't been thinking about the fight. Days like this I worry about the fight. If we don't keep making strides we could lose. Hate to say it but it's true. Try to push myself, harder, further, faster everyday – want to get some kind of momentum going. Times like these, I think a lot about the enemy. I think about Joshua. He says he's not on our side – he's just looking out for the best interests of the Gua – a true patriot. Don't really care, as long as it benefits us. Like the time I was on the run from the Feds in Montana and Joshua first helped me. I'd handed an alien a gun – she was posing as a forest ranger, was supposed to "protect" me from the FBI once they took me and their "agent" (aka Joshua) into custody. Thought I was about to give the government proof that the aliens existed. Almost got myself killed instead. When I asked Joshua why he killed his back up, he told me he was doing it for himself. He saved my life because he knew the invasion wasn't the best thing for his people. Figured with me out here causing problems for the Gua, the Second Wave was less likely to happen. Still pray he's right. It was the first sign that Joshua and I had a common goal – to stop the Second Wave. I was in his debt but that didn't mean I'd always trust him. Joshua is still Gua, maybe the best they have to offer, but he'll always be an alien first. If I could, I might tell Joshua that we need each other. The Gua's experiments have no honor – I believe Joshua's intentions do. Joshua wouldn't support the type of experiments the Gua were running – don't believe he even knows about all of them. But I've seen first hand how evil they can be. Like the hideous stuff the aliens were doing in that hospital in L.A. Using humans as little more than guinea pigs – chopping them up and playing mix-and-match with their parts. Attaching Gua tentacles to human bodies – giving Alikah a pair of stolen eyes. Sick stuff. That one still gives me nightmares. It's a perfect example of how the how the Gua can't even trust themselves. Like the experiment in Normal, Illinois where another renegade Gua came to our aide when he realized the his leaders were planning to use an experiment on human teens to control the sex drives of the aliens when the Second Wave came. The alien town sheriff, John, thought it was one thing to be testing out the control device on us, and another to be prepping a device that could be used on the Gua. A pair of believers, Robbie Harlock and his girlfriend Laura, survived the alien plot and we lost the Gua who helped us, but not before John made it clear that he had chosen to fight against the Gua mission. Before he died, John said the Gua forces were poised to destroy humanity and that it was coming soon. There are millions of Gua here on Earth to be possibly consumed by human passions – John took a stand – not to help us, but again to help his own. And that's a good thing. As long as the Gua attempt to hurt themselves there'll be "patriots" ready to protect their people as a whole. The aliens use us – for their tests, to make the invasion easier, to keep order once they're here. And Joshua isn't above it either. There was that time in Cleveland when he used me to get a disk that contained the Earth identities of 200 Gua operatives. He traded Stephen (the boy who had stumbled upon the info) for the disk – Joshua knew I wouldn't let an innocent die no matter what the prize was. Joshua was protecting his people from me, he knew I'd hunt down the names on that disk and couldn't let anything happen to his comrades who he felt were just doing their jobs. That's the way Joshua used to see it – all black and white. The Gua were doing their jobs – and for them that's conquering. And even if that's what they were here to do, even if the best warriors they have to offer believed that they could beat us when they got here, I believe we're giving them reason to doubt their actions. A long time ago Joshua told me the word Gua meant power to overcome. Now, sometimes, I think he wonders if they can live up to their name. The Gua are realizing there's more to us than they first anticipated – now they know we're strong and because of that, some of them are realizing they could lose. That's why Joshua doesn't want an invasion. And that's why we're gonna win.moreless
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