First Years

Season 1 Episode 3

There's No Place Like Homo

Aired Monday 9:00 PM Apr 03, 2001 on NBC



  • Quotes

    • ANNA: Mr. McDougal, let's be realistic. I know I don't have a case. What I do know is I have an 80-year-old client with failing health. She could live, what, another 4 or 5 years maybe? Would it really hurt you to let her live in her home until that time? Your house will probably appreciate to 5 or 6 times its current market value. You're a smart investor, why not invest in one old woman's quality of life?
      MCDOUGAL: Tell the old bitch to be out by the 30th.

      EVELYN: I don't want him to know.
      ROY: I already know. He's gay, you think you're dying and I just want to read my paper. Is that too much to ask?

      EDGAR: Are we positive we have to dress up for this thing?
      MILES: It's gay people, Egg. Just be glad there's not a theme.
      EDGAR: Does this shirt go with this tie?
      RILEY: Well, they both have lavender in them
      EDGAR: Lavender? I thought this was light blue
      MILES: Looks lavender to me.
      EDGAR: Hey, what color is this?
      ANNA: Gay.