Dr. Frasier Crane
Daphne Moon Crane
Dr. Niles Crane
Voice of Doug
Frasier has bought a telescope as a surprise gift for his father. In the series pilot, "The Good Son", there is a rather sophisticated telescope on a tripod visible on the balcony of Frasier's apartment (not the brass one introduced here and not present in episodes 2, 3 or 4).
Niles claims that Aunt Patrice and Maris love to trot out this so-called "G-Speak" at parties, and yet every time Aunt Patrice visits, Maris is invariably bed-ridden. It seems inplausible that Maris would cook up a game with a person for whom she has so evident a dislike-and if Maris inevitably takes ill when her aunt visits, when would they have a chance to attend a party together? Patrice herself said that to that day, she had no idea how tall Maris was.
Martin: Well, it's a long time since I've been dating. Have things changed much in the last forty years?
Frasier: Well, the wardrobe is a little different, but your ultimate goal is still the same.
Martin: Daphne, have I got this tie on right?
Daphne: It just needs a minor adjustment. What's all this hair on it?
Martin: The only way I can get the knot right is if I tie it on Eddie first.
Daphne: I got pizza rolls in the back of the freezer but the expiration date was yesterday. Are we game?
Martin: Okay, when I'm ready. Thanks, Frasier. You know, I guess I don't say it often enough but you're a good kid.
Frasier: Well, thanks Dad. You know, there's something I don't say often enough...
Martin: (correcting)There's nothing you don't say often enough.
Frasier: (greets her) Well, of course. Aunt Patrice, yes. I don't recall really when we met but I believe there was a lot of laughing and dancing.
Patrice: My husband's funeral.
Frasier: Yes...well, of course, the laughter was to hide our tears.
Niles: Oh, who knows why anybody does anything?
Frasier: Remind me again what you do for a living? You see the thing is, it was just one phone call. How can anyone make a sound judgment about another person on the basis of one phone call?
Niles: Remind me again what it is you do for a living?
Frasier: Well anyway, I suppose it could be any number of reasons. Fear of rejection, shyness...
Martin: (whispers) Tell her I'm not home.
Frasier: Dad, she knows you're home...she's looking at you through the telescope.
Frasier: I'm going to help along your little romance and possibly save a small forest. I'm giving her our telephone number.
Martin: (in terror) No, no, no, no, no, don't do that!
Martin: Well, she'll think I'm being too forward.
Frasier: For God's sake, Dad, you met peeping into her apartment.
Doug: Look, it's about my mother. She's getting on now and she doesn't have much of a life. And she doesn't want to do anything or go anywhere and she literally hangs around the house all day. I mean, it's very frustrating...
Frasier: I'm sorry Doug, can we just go back a second? You said your mother literally hangs around the house. Well, I suppose it's a pet peeve of mine but I suppose what you mean is that she figuratively "hangs around" the house. To literally hang around the house you'd have to be a bat or spider monkey. Now, back to your problem?
Doug: Do you mind if we stop while I tell you my pet peeve?
Frasier: Not at all.
Doug: (angry) I hate it when intellectual pinheads with superiority complexes nit-pick your grammar when they come to you for help. That's what I got a problem with! (hangs up)
United Kingdom: 18th May 1994, Channel 4
Episode Title: Here's Looking At You
This is a reference to the famous 'Here's looking at you, kid' quote from the 1942 movie Casablanca.
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