Season 11 Episode 18

Match Game

Aired Thursday 9:00 PM Mar 30, 2004 on NBC



  • Quotes

    • Charlotte: He's a big radio star – smart, really sweet. So think about it. Here's my card.
      Frasier: (comes up behind her) You lied to me. You have five clients. There is no roster of eligible women!
      Charlotte: (snatches the binder back) You looked at my client log?
      Frasier: Yes, I've seen your log, and I've dated every toad on it!
      Woman: Is this the guy?
      Charlotte: No, no, no, different guy. Call me.
      (She leads him back to the table)
      Frasier: I think the police might be interested in this little scam of yours.
      Charlotte: It is not a scam! I... I just didn't have time to put the other pictures in, and I will not work one second with someone who threatens me. I'll mail you a check.
      (She rises angrily, so does he)
      Frasier: I'll save you the price of a stamp. I'll see you at your office tomorrow.
      Charlotte: Fine. I'd say come alone, but that's a given.
      (She walks toward the exit. Suddenly her heel breaks off, she slips and
      lands hard on her knee, collapsing to the floor with a cry of pain. Frasier, the maitre 'd, and several diners gather around in concern)

      Charlotte: (breaking down) Oh God! What a crappy, crappy day!
      Frasier: Charlotte, are you okay?
      Charlotte: I can't give you a check. I've already... I've already spent the money on rent, and food, and... and these shoes. (takes one off and hammers it on the floor) These stupid, stupid shoes!
      Frasier: (helps her up) Come on now, it's okay.
      Charlotte: No, it's not! Nothing's okay. I lied to you. I just started this business. But I'm really good at what I do! I used to run the biggest matchmaking business in Chicago – before I lost it to my rotten ex-husband in the divorce.
      Frasier: Divorce? But you're wearing a wedding ring.
      Charlotte: (holds up her hand) It's camouflage. It inspires confidence. I mean, nobody wants a matchmaker whose life's a mess - like me!
      (She bursts into tears, and Frasier helps her back to the table)
      Charlotte: I'm divorced, my business is a joke, and I'm up to my ass in debt, and I had to move in with my mother. I am thirty-five years old, and I am living with my mother! How pathetic is that?
      Frasier: (carefully) Well, I... I've seen worse. You mentioned something earlier about having a drink.
      Charlotte: Oh, believe me, I will. If my mother hasn't finished the bottle.
      Frasier: No, I meant here. (signals the waiter)
      Charlotte: No, I really can't. I've got to get home. I have paperwork, I have calls to make...
      Frasier: It's my treat.
      Charlotte: ("life preserver!") Double Scotch.

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