Maris sends Niles gifts to try to woo him back. Frasier believes the gifts were sent to him, so he risks a good relationship to try to find his secret admirer.
Dr. Frasier Crane
Daphne Moon Crane
Dr. Niles Crane
Robert "Bulldog" Briscoe (seasons 4 - 6, recurring otherwise)
Frasier makes a big deal in this episode about being pursued by two women; he explains that he wants to enjoys this now that the day has finally come. However, The Life of the Party, one of the final episodes of season five, involved Frasier being pursued by not two but three women. He made a very big deal about that as well.
In the final scene, Frasier arrives at Niles' fresh from his date and asks how it went with Maris. Niles says that he returned the gifts (plural). Since Frasier wore the cufflinks on his date, the most Niles could have returned was the pocket watch.
Martin : (To Frasier and Niles) I learned when you were kids to stay out of it whenever you two started fighting. I'd just wait until the whole thing ended, usually in tears, and then I'd take you both out for ice cream. That was my job; ice cream man.
(Niles gets bad news from Maris)
Niles: I don't believe it! I thought I made myself perfectly clear. What is wrong with that woman?
Martin: Why don't you start, Frasier? I'll jump in when you get hoarse.
(Niles opens the box and pulls the shredded paper aside. There is a
small ring box which he opens. The only thing inside is a coin. He
picks up the card)
Niles: Roses are red, your heart is fickle. When I'm through with you... all you'll have left is this nickel.
Martin: Oh, no.
Niles: Oh, God... she's going to ruin me.
Frasier: No, no, Niles, maybe she's bluffing. You know, once she's signed the financial settlement...
Niles: (picking up the paper) She's not bluffing. This IS the financial settlement. Oh, Frasier, why did I go over there? Why didn't I listen to you?
Martin: I'll bet it is Maris! You said yourself you saw that watch on your honeymoon.
Niles: Oh, that's absurd. Dad, we're in the process of finalizing our divorce.
Martin: (to the waitress) Excuse me, miss? Do you remember the woman who brought this box in?
Waitress: Yeah, she was very well dressed and really, really thin.
(Martin looks smug)
Niles: That could be a lot of people.
Waitress: Yeah, she just dropped off the gift then ordered a whole-milk mocha with whipped cream and chocolate shavings.
Niles: (laughing with relief) Oh, thank God. That's not her.
Waitress: Yeah it was really weird, though. She just took a long whiff of it and then just handed it back.
Roz: Do you know how long it's been since... you know. I've probably forgotten how.
Frasier: Oh, Roz, I'm sure it will come back to you. It's just like riding a bicyclist... bicycle.
Daphne: I suppose fathers are the same everywhere. Mine couldn't bear to see us fight. If there was so much as a peep out of us, he'd be out the door to the pub. Stay for a few hours, sometimes overnight. Then, when they brought him back the next morning, we couldn't fight because of his headaches. I suppose that was part of his plan to keep harmony in the family. God bless him.
Frasier: Hey there.
Daphne: So, who won the squash game?
Frasier: Oh, Daphne, it's not about winning or losing, it's about the thrill of the competition.
Martin: Congratulations, Niles.
Niles: Thanks, Dad. Pumped as I was, I don't think anybody could have beat me today, even an actual athlete.
Frasier: Well, here we are.
Nancy: So, are we still on for Friday night?
Frasier: Yes, of course we are. You know, I was wondering...maybe we could just, uh...
Nancy: Have dinner at your place?
Frasier: Yes, that's amazing. You read my mind again.
Nancy: Well, I just thought it would be more comfortable. We could curl up on the couch, make a nice fire...
Frasier: Can you guess what I'm thinking now?
)She looks at him, then gasps and playfully slaps his face)
Frasier: Oh, you ARE good, aren't you?
Nancy: Actually, I just started seeing someone.
Roz: Well, you'll forget all about him when you meet Chuck. He is so handsome and rugged and he loves the outdoors...
Frasier: Kindly leave him there. You see, the person that Nancy is seeing is me.
Roz: Really? You two are dating?
Frasier: Even as we speak!
Roz: Oh, my God! I am so sorry. Well, good for you. I mean, who needs Chuck when you've got... well, the anti-Chuck? (She gets up) When my muffin gets here, could you send it over?
Roz: (commenting on Frasier's very active love life) Well, I guess since they cloned that sheep, anything's possible.
Roz is referring to "Dolly", a ewe that in 1996 was the first animal to be cloned from an adult somatic cell. The donor cell was taken from the mammary gland, which is why they named her after celebrity Dolly Parton.
Frasier: (Suggesting comically that his date Nancy has psychic abilities) Busboy - clear these spoons before she starts bending them!
This alludes to self-proclaimed psychic Uri Geller who achieved a degree of fame during the 70's with his apparent ability to bend forks and spoons simply by rubbing them.
Title: Secret Admirer
The episode title shares the same name as the 1985 Romantic Comedy "Secret Admirer".
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