Friday Night with Jonathan Ross - Season 12

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BBC (ended 2010)

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Episode Guide

  • J.K. Rowling, Bob Hoskins, Gok Wan, Paul Weller & Graham Coxon, The Arctic Monkeys.
    Rarity is the common factor this week. A television appearance by the Arctic Monkeys, which is as rare as an Eskimo with a bikini and something that's as rare as hen's toothpaste - an interview with Harry Potter creator, J.K. Rowling. Also rare - possibly unique - is a London-born Norwegian sailor. Step forward, Bob Hoskins. The programme is scheduled to return in September 2007.moreless
  • Bruce Willis, Fearne Cotton, Pete Doherty, Arcade Fire.
    The combined weight of Fearne Cotton and Pete Doherty tops the scales at a porky 42 kilograms - 43 if they are wet. I doubt they could overpower a fractious kitten or contain an angry wasp. Bruce Willis and I share a birthday; that's about all we have in common as I have hair and a natural aversion to Demi Moore (and all her films).moreless
  • Russell Brand, Serena Williams, Iggy & The Stooges.
  • Shilpa Shetty, Alex James, Rob Lowe, CSS.
    Shilpa Shetty; Bollywood superstar and the recipient of verbal bullying from Jade Goody in Celebrity Big Brother. Alex James has lead the typical rock star lifestyle: gigs, women, drinking and cheese-making. They want it all don't they?
  • Myleene Klass, Nick Frost, Andy Roddick, My Chemical Romance.
  • Bear Grylls, Gordon Ramsay, Tori Spelling, Klaxons.
    I was going to make fun of Bear Grylls because of his name, that was until I discovered that he was in the S.A.S. so I thought better of it. If I made fun of Gordon Ramsay on the other hand, he would probably just call me a ****. (He wouldn’t be the first).moreless
  • Justin Lee Collins, Freema Agyeman, Ozzy Osbourne.
    There was a time when Ozzy liked nothing more than to tuck in to a bat's head for a snack, these days he's far happier with a delicious butter substitute. We all mellow with age. I'm worried that Justin Lee Collins will end up as the latest canine member of Ozzy's family due to his cartoon dog-like appearance. I'm sure he wouldn't get away with using the floor as a toilet as easily as Ozzy's real dogs seem to.moreless
  • Eddie Izzard, John Barrowman, Andrew Lloyd Webber, Janice Dickinson, Regina Spektor.
    Evita, Cats, Starlight Express - just three of the musicals written by Andrew Lloyd Webber, that I have no intention of ever going to see. John Barrowman has probably seen all of them at least 83 times. Also appearing tonight in a skirt, Janice Dickinson and possibly Eddie Izzard.
  • Fern Britton, Phillip Schofield, Sir Alan Sugar, Rufus Wainwright, Kaiser Chiefs.
  • Helena Bonham Carter, Rob Brydon, Greg Rusedski,The View.
    Rob Brydon stars in a programme called 'Annually Retentive'. Does that mean he can or can not stand next to the piano? If you are drunk whilst watching this episode, that's Helena Bonham Carter - not Robert Smith from The Cure.
  • Bill Bailey, Sarah Brightman, Tobey Maguire, Kirsten Dunst, Jamie T.
    Bill Bailey is a funny guy; he's on tour - go and see him. Shout 'weasels' and hear his reply: 'dormice'!
  • Gilbert & George, Patsy Kensit, Alan Carr, Bryan Ferry.
    A curious mix of guests this week. Artists Gilbert & George who began their careers in performance art, now better known for their brightly coloured photo-montages. Not my cup of tea to be honest, but they did win the Turner Prize in 1986. Liverpool won the League and F.A. Cup double in the same year, which probably explains why I missed their finest hour. Stephen Gerrard in full flow - now that's art Jonathan's former warm-up man Alan Carr is back as is the woman who's had more rock stars that the green room at Live Aid, Patsy Kensit. Smooth, suited Mackem Bryan Ferry provides the music - hopefully not something by Wagner.moreless
  • Ursula Andress, Jamie Cullum, Mark Strong, Dynamo, Kings of Leon.
    When Ursula Andress emerged from the sea In the James Bond film Dr. No, wearing only a white bikini and an offensive weapon, men the world over felt all sexy. It was pretty much the same sexy feeling I got when looking at the Aston Martin DB5 in Goldfinger. Each to their own, eh?

    If Jamie Cullum, 'hip-hop street magician' Dynamo, Mark Strong or the Kings of Leon are wearing white bikinis in this episode, I am officially retiring as editor.moreless
  • John Travolta, Gareth Gates, Ricky Gervais, Macy Gray.
    Ricky Gervais? On Jonathan's show? That must have taken some serious negotiating - or maybe just a kiss. Completing the guest list are full-time pilot and part-time actor John Travolta and Macy Gray, who is a dead ringer for that bear from The Hair Bear Bunch.
  • Ricky Hatton, Daniel Radcliffe, Thandie Newton, The Good, The Bad & The Queen.
    Ladies and gentlemen - he's back. The suited, wavy-haired cheeky monkey himself, Mr Ross, welcomes us to his new series with the distinct possibility of a punch-up. Boxer, Ricky Hatton, goes toe-to-toe with Jonathan, while Thandie Newton will do well to stay that far away from him and his saucy banter. Daniel Radcliffe, who has gone from boy wizard to horse fondler, returns to the show as does Damon Albarn with yet another new band, The Good, The Bad & The Queen. Has he finally formed a good one?moreless