Friends Season 2 Episode 17

Chandler: (About Baywatch) Well that's the brilliance of it. The pretty people... and the running.

Phoebe: (About the woman who sang "Smelly Cat") I mean this poor woman.
Ross: What woman?
Phoebe: The voice woman. Ya know, I mean, she has a great voice but she doesn't have a video.
Rachel: Okay, Pheebs. But what about you?
Phoebe: Well I have a video, you have to pay attention. No this, this voice woman, she's so talented but, according to the producer people, they said she doesn't have like the right look or something, you know. I mean, it's like, she's like one of those animals at the pound who like nobody wants 'cause they're not pretty enough or you know. Like, like some old dog who's just kind of like stinky and. Huh, oh my God, she's smelly cat. Oh, oh that song has so many levels.

Chandler: Well you know, we got to talking and, uh, he said he needed a place and I had a spare room.
Joey: Oh, now it's a spare room?
Chandler: Well yeah, in that it's not being used and I... have it to spare.

Monica: But I thought you wanted to live by yourself.
Joey: I did. I thought it'd be great. I figured I'd have, like, time alone with my thoughts, but, you know, it turns out I don't have as many thoughts as you'd think.

Monica: Damn it, Ross, get your butt out of the bathroom!
Ross: Calm down, I'm blow drying.
Monica: Blow drying what? You have no hair.

Joey: Yeah. Uh, oh, the best part, come on. (Leads them to the bathroom) Huh?
Rachel: Hey, nice toilet.
Joey: No no no, behind it.
Ross: You have a phone in here?
Joey: That's right, I have a phone in here.
Monica: Joey, promise me something.
Joey: Yeah.
Monica: Never call me from that phone.

Phoebe: (Looking at a water sculpture that looks like a window with rain running down it) Hey, excellent, excellent water-table thing.
Joey: Thanks, yeah. I love this, but you know what? It makes me want to pee.
Phoebe: Yeah, well, me too. Yeah. I think that's the challenge.

Joey: (Showing off his new, horribly tacky apartment). Huh? So what do you think? Casa de Joey. Huh? (Proudly) I decorated it myself.
Ross: Get out.
All: No!

Monica: I can't believe he has a new roommate. Who is this guy?
Ross: Uh, Eddie something. He just met him.
Rachel: It'll never last, he's just a rebound roommate.

Chandler: (About Baywatch) See, this is the brilliance of the show. I say always keep them running. All the time, running. Run. Run Yasmine, run like the wind.

Phoebe: Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God. You are not gonna believe this. I have just been discovered.
Chandler: Now wait a minute, I claimed you in the name of France four years ago.

Joey: Who's eggs do you like better, his or mine? Huh?
Chandler: Well I like both eggs equally.
Joey: Oh come on! Nobody like two different kinds of eggs equally. You like one better then the other and I wanna know which.
Chandler: Well what's the difference? Your eggs aren't here anymore are they? You took your eggs and you left! Did you really expect me never to find new eggs?

Phoebe: (About her edited music video) I... I've never heard myself sing before... except in my own head. This is so cool, now I can hear what you hear!
Rachel: Pretty... uh... different huh?
Phoebe: I'm sorry, but I am really talented!

Rachel: Oh, my God.
Ross: Monica keeps changing the channel.
Monica: Aw, that's great. Why don't you tell Mommy on me?
Rachel: Now, I'm Mommy in this little play? Alright, I refuse to get sucked into this weird little Geller dimension thing, so I'm gonna go and take a nice, long bubble bath because you kids are driving me crazy.