Goof: It seems highly unlikely that Ross and Rachel would not have their daughter, Emma, on Christmas.
Phoebe: Chandler, your being here is the best Christmas present I could have ever imagined.
Chandler: (Flattered) Aw.
Phoebe: Now give me my real gift.
Chandler: Look, you're a really nice person... ham stealing and adultery
aside. But what I have with my wife is pretty great, so nothing is ever gonna happen between us.
Wendy: Okay, let me ask you something: if what you and your wife have is so great, then why are you spending Christmas with me?
Chandler: Whoa-ho, back off, Missy!
Wendy: (Laughs) Missy?
Chandler: I don't know, I'm not used to girls making passes at me! Wait a minute... am I sexy in Oklahoma?
Joey: Ah, wait, is Wendy the runner-up Miss Oklahoma?
Chandler: Well, she, she didn't win...
Monica: Alright, well, maybe I should let you and the second prettiest
girl in Oklahoma get back to work.
Chandler: Well, second prettiest that year. I mean, of all the girls in Oklahoma, she's probably...
Rachel: Oh Chandler, stop talking!
Monica: So is it horrible? Is everybody working really hard?
Chandler: Ah, well no, it's just, uh, me and Wendy.
Monica: Wendy? That sounds like a girl's name.
Chandler: It is. Did I... not tell you about her?
Monica: Um, um, about the time you told me about New Year's Eve.
Rachel: (About Ross's gift) Oh, I love it!
Ross: Really? You're not gonna return it?
Rachel: Well, not this second!
Chandler: Look, I'm married!
Wendy: So? I'm married.
Chandler: I'm happily married.
Wendy: Oh, what's that like?
Chandler: Turns out they can't fire me. Because I quit.
Ross: What, you really quit your job?
Chandler: Yeah, it was a stupid job. (To Monica) And I could not stand leaving you. And why should I be the only one who doesn't get to do what he really wants?
Rachel: So what do you really want to do?
Chandler: I have not thought this through.
Chandler: She's regional vice president, she's just below me.
Monica: She did what?
Chandler: Be-low me.
Monica: Is she pretty?
Chandler: Uh... uh...
Ross: Answer faster, answer faster.
Chandler: I don't know.
Ross: Answer better, answer better.
Chandler: I'll see you on New Year's Day.
Monica: You're not going to be here on New Year's Eve?!
Chandler: Oh, did I forget to mention that? And to all a good night.
(Chandler runs out of the apartment)
Chandler: My wife is amazing, she's beautiful and smart. If she was here right now, she'd kick your ass.
Chandler: Hey, you know what I just realized? You are the sole wage earner. You are the head of the household. I don't do anything. I am a kept man.
Monica: You are! Hey, here's twenty bucks. Why don't you buy yourself something pretty while I'm at work tomorrow.
The clips used in this episode are from:
"The One with the Girl from Poughkeepsie"
"The One with the Routine"
"The One with Phoebe's Dad"
"The One with the Holiday Armadillo"
"The One with the Truth about London"
"The One Hundredth"
"The One in Vegas (2)"
"The One with Rachel's Book"
International Episode Title:
France: Celui qui passait Noël à Tulsa (The One Who Spent Christmas In Tulsa)
Chandler, played by Matthew Perry, was the only friend with a story line in this episode.
This episode runs 23:09 on DVD (a typical sitcom runs about 22:00).
Clip Show #5.
Phoebe: He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all flew, like the down of a thistle.
But I heard him exclaim, 'ere he drove out of sight:
"Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night."
Phoebe is reciting the end of "The Night Before Christmas," also known as "A Visit From St. Nicholas," an anonymous traditional Christmas poem written in 1823.
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