Friends Season 5 Episode 13

Joey: Here, I brought you some flowers.
Phoebe: Oh, thank you!
Chandler: Yeah, pulling flowers out of it makes the bag look a lot more masculine.

Phoebe: Grandma died.
Ursula: Didn't she die, like, five years ago?
Phoebe: No, she just died today. We're having a memorial service tomorrow.
Ursula: Okay, I know I went to that already.
Phoebe: No, you didn't!
Ursula: Then who's been dead for five years?
Phoebe: Well, lots of people!

Ross: Hey Pheebs, how's it going?
Phoebe: Only okay because I just got back from the hospital.
Joey: Are you all right?
Phoebe: I'm fine, but my grandma sort of died. It's okay, she had a really incredible life. It's not like I won't ever see her again. She'll visit.
Rachel: maybe she's with us right now.
Phoebe: Right. It's her first day on a new spiritual plane and she's gonna come to the coffeehouse.

Joey: (Picking up top hat from floor) Hey dude look out, you almost crushed my hat. (Puts hat on couch)
Chandler: (Picks up hat) The bunny got away.

Joey: (About his top hat) Like you could find something as sophisticated as this.
(Chandler puts a bread basket on his head)
Chandler: Done.

Monica: (Giving Chandler a bad massage unknowningly) You like that, don't you?
Chandler: Yeah, I like it so much I don't know what I've done to deserve it.
Monica: Say goodbye to sore muscles!
Chandler: Goodbye, muscles!

Chandler: (About Monica, to Joey) I'm telling you, she gives the worst massages ever! Okay, it was like she was torturing me for information. And I wanted to give it up I just... I didn't know what it was!