Season 9 Episode 5

The One with Phoebe's Birthday Dinner

Aired Thursday 8:00 PM Oct 31, 2002 on NBC



  • Trivia

    • Goof: Rachel says that she and Ross were late to Phoebe's birthday dinner because they were locked out of their apartment, but that's not the reason. The real reason was that Judy, their babysitter, was stuck in "terrible traffic". Since they couldn't have left until Judy arrived, anyway, it didn't make any difference that they were locked out.

    • Trivia: In the restaurant when Phoebe says about the rest of the gang, "Well, I guess they're not coming... do you want to just order?", Joey says "Thank-you!" and gets up and kisses Phoebe on the mouth. Her genuinely surprised reaction and laughter suggest that the kiss was improvised by Matt LeBlanc.

    • Continuity: After Phoebe learned Mike was available, she ditched the gang for him. However, in "The One with All the Cheesecakes," Phoebe said it's wrong to ditch friends for dates.

    • Continuity: Ross tells Rachel that she hasn't cooked since 1996, but in 1999, in "The One Where Ross Got High", Rachel made her infamous English trifle with beef dessert for Thanksgiving.

    • Continuity: Phoebe's birthday is inconsistent. In "The One with Frank Jr." Phoebe tells her half-brother that her birthday is February 16th. Also, in "The One with Two Parts (2)" Phoebe has a birthday party in February. However, in "The One Where Nana Dies Twice" Rachel talks about Phoebe's last birthday party. Since Rachel first met Phoebe earlier that season, this implies that Phoebe's birthday must have occurred since September, when Rachel first joined the group. In this episode, Phoebe's birthday is close to Halloween, consistent with Rachel's statement. Furthermore, in "The One Where They All Turn Thirty", the flashbacks of Phoebe's 30th (really 31st) birthday imply her birthday is in the summer.

  • Quotes

    • Phoebe: (about her birthday dinner) Alright, okay, so we can all go now. That's fun. Hey, y'know what? We all haven't been together, the six of us, in such a long time.
      Monica: What are you talking about? ...we're all together right now.
      Rachel: Um, Mon? Chandler's not here.
      Monica: (realizing) Oh, dear God!

    • Ken: (at a Tulsa office meeting) Is it true the reason you're here in Tulsa is that you fell asleep in a meeting and took the job without realizing what you were saying yes to?
      Chandler: Well, don't believe everything you hear, Ken... But yeah, that's true.

    • Chandler: (to Claudia who's lighting a cigarette at a meeting in Tulsa) You're not allowed to smoke in this office, though, right?
      Claudia: Yes... In Oklahoma it's legal to smoke in offices with fifteen people or less... (sliding her cigarette pack over to him) Would you like one?
      Chandler: (desperate) Would Joey like two pizzas?!! (seeing her confused reaction) You don't know what I'm talking about... (after collecting himself) Alright, look... I don't smoke anymore, but if the rest of you wanna light up, go ahead... it's fine.
      (Everyone in the boardroom but Chandler lights up)
      Chandler: (looking around himself) So, you all smoke... then... It's almost rude that I'm not smoking...
      Ken: Well, that's not true... If you don't wanna smoke--
      Chandler: Ken!! Please!! (thinking about it) No, I can't... I can't smoke. If I smoke, my wife would kill me.
      Ken: I'm sorry, but... isn't your wife back in New York?
      Chandler: (taking and lighting a cigarette from Claudia's pack) I've always liked you, Ken.

    • Phoebe: (to Monica) Happy humping!

    • Phoebe: (in the hall) Oh, Chandler! You stink of cigarettes!
      Chandler: Do you think Monica is going to be able to smell it?
      Phoebe: Are you kidding? That woman has the nose of a bloodhound! (mostly to herself) ...and the breasts of a Greek goddess...
      Chandler: Pheebs?
      Phoebe: (smiling self-consciously) I'm gonna go.

    • Monica: What do I smell? I smell smoke. (sniffs Chandler and gasps) Did you smoke?!
      Chandler: Yes, but I just had one... Two... Two tiny cigarettes. Okay, five... A pack. Two packs... a... a carton. Three big fat cartons in two days! But it's over... I've made a decision. I'm not gonna smoke anymore.

    • Ross: (to Rachel after hanging up the phone) That was my mom. She's stuck in terrible traffic.
      Rachel: Okay, well that is now the third sign that I should not leave Emma.
      Ross: Uh, what are the other two?
      Rachel: Well, see, the first one is... I don't want to, and... I'm not going.

    • (Ross has to wait for his mother, their babysitter, so urges Rachel to go on ahead)
      : Just go! Go out! ...Really, the world is your oyster! Kick up your heels! Paint the town red!
      Rachel: You need to learn some new slang.
      Ross: I'm serious. C'mon, you should go... (escorts her from the apartment) 
      Rachel: Ah...
      Ross: No, no! Just go!
      Rachel: (pointing into the apartment) Well...
      Ross: No, no. Y'know what? (closes the apartment door). You're not gettin' back in there! The baby's fine, now scram! ...Yeah, hit the bricks! ...Tell your story walkin'!
      Rachel: I was just going to say that I left my keys...
      Ross: Oh... (tries the door but it's locked) Holy moley, are we in a pickle now!

    • Phoebe: (to the waiter about the rest of their party) One needn't worry. They shan't be long.
      Waiter: It's just that we do have some large parties waiting...
      Phoebe: Oh, one really does have a stick up one's ass, doesn't one?

    • Chandler: (about having smoked in Tulsa) I was in a meeting... Everybody was smoking.
      Monica: So what? ...don't you have any willpower?
      Chandler: Willpower? I've watched home movies of you eating Ding Dongs without taking the tinfoil off!

    • Chandler: I'm not going to smoke again.
      Monica: That's right, because I forbid you to smoke again!
      Chandler: You forbid me?
      Monica: Mm-hm.
      Chandler: You know, I've flown a long way to see my loving wife--is she here, by the way?

    • Monica: Today is the last day that I'm ovulating and if we don't do it now we'll have to wait till next month.
      Chandler: Fine, but no talking...
      Monica: ...and no cuddling.
      Chandler: ...and no kissing your neck!
      Monica: Oh, good... I hate it when you do that!
      Chandler: ...and lots of kissing your neck!

    • Rachel: (about being locked out of their apartment) You have to do something! Knock that door down!
      Ross: I would, but I bruise like a peach.

    • Rachel: (about Emma alone in the apartment) What if she jumped out of the bassinet?
      Ross: Can't hold her own head up, but yeah, "jumped".

    • Rachel: Did I leave the stove on?
      Ross: You haven't cooked since 1996!

    • Ross: (exaggerating Rachel's fears for Emma) A pigeon, a pigeon... No, no wait! An eagle flew in! ...Landed on the stove and caught fire. The baby, seeing this, jumps across the apartment to the mighty bird's aid. The eagle, however, misconstrues this as an act of aggression and grabs the baby in its talons! Meanwhile, the faucet fills the apartment with water... Baby and bird, still ablaze, are locked in a death grip, swirling around in the whirlpool that fills the apartment!!
      Rachel: Boy, are you gonna be sorry if that's true.

    • (Judy finally arrives and lets Ross and Rachel back into the apartment)
      Rachel: (to Emma) Whoa, God! Oh, thank God you're okay. Oh, I'm so sorry we left you. Mommy will never leave you again. Never, ever, ever again.
      Ross: Great. So let's get going.
      Rachel: Oh, no, I mean it! After what just happened, I'm never leaving her again.
      Judy: I understand. Separation is hard. One time, I was about to leave Ross to go to the beauty parlor, and he got so upset he took off all his clothes, tucked his willie between his legs, and cried, "Mommy, I'm a girl! Take me with you!"
      Ross: (dryly, to Judy) Somehow, over time, it got easier to be apart from you.

    • Phoebe: (to Ross and Rachel) You guys are over an hour late, what happened to you?
      Rachel: Well, we got locked out of the apartment...
      Joey: That's a great story--can I eat it?!

    • Rachel: (looking at the menu after arriving late) Oh, everything looks delicious. What should I have? What should I have?
      Joey: (to himself) Never hit a woman... never hit a woman...
      Ross: (looking at the menu) I know what you mean... it's like incredible!
      Joey: (to himself) Ross bruises like a peach. He bruises like a peach!

    • Chandler: I would never lie to get someone into bed.
      Monica: You used to tell girls you were a Kennedy!

    • Monica: (looking at the menu) Well, I suppose that Chandler will have the (looks at Chandler) ...smoked duck!
      Chandler: And I suppose that Monica will have the... manipulative shrew.

    • Phoebe: All I wanted to do was have dinner with my friends on my birthday. And you were all so late and you didn't even have the courtesy to call! (her cell phone starts ringing) Well, it's too late now!
      Ross: Phoebe, I don't think that's us.

    • Chandler: (to Joey about Monica) You're not gonna believe this. She lied. She tricked me into having sex with her.
      Joey: (puzzled) So? ...You got to have sex, right?
      Chandler: (reflecting) What's the matter with me? Why am I such a girl?

    • (The other five have left and the waiters bring Joey all six meals)
      : Dinner for six for one? (tucking in his napkin) Well... you boys are about to see something really special...

  • Notes

  • Allusions

    • Chandler: (to Monica) I've watched home movies of you eating Ding Dongs without taking the tinfoil off!
      Ding Dongs are small, cream-filled chocolate cakes marketed by Hostess Brands since 1967.

    • Visible in the restaurant where Phoebe is having her birthday dinner are reproductions of a series of paintings (Spring, Summer, Autumn and Winter) by Giuseppe Arcimboldo. This 16th century Italian painter was famous for creating portrait heads made entirely of depicted objects such as fruit, vegetables and flowers, as is the case with the paintings seen in the restaurant.