Season 2 Episode 9

The One with Phoebe's Dad

Aired Thursday 8:00 PM Dec 14, 1995 on NBC



  • Trivia

    • Goof: The paperboy did Monica's crossword puzzle wherein fourteen-across was the title of a Gershwin musical. He entered "Bite me bite me bite me bite me" as the answer, which is 24 letters. No Gershwin musical has that many letters in the title. The longest Gershwin musical title is Nice Work if You Can Get It, with only 21 letters.

    • Trivia: In Phoebe's Grandmother's apartment, an "original Buffay" (a work of art involving a woman coming out of a picture frame) can be seen in the background. These paintings figure later in Season 10's "The One with Ross's Grant".

    • Continuity: In this episode Phoebe says her father left her mother before she was born, however, in Season 5's "The One with Joey's Bag", Frank Buffay says he used to sing lullabies to Phoebe and Ursula.

  • Quotes

    • Phoebe: Oh, Ugly Naked Guy is decorating his tree. Oh my God! You should see the size of his Christmas balls.

    • Joey: Hey, how much did you guys tip the super this year?
      Chandler: Yeah, we were gonna give fifty, but if you guys gave more, we don't wanna look bad.
      Monica: Oh, actually this year we just made him homemade cookies.
      Chandler: And twenty-five it is.
      Joey: You gave him cookies?
      Monica: Money is so impersonal... "Cookies" says someone really cares...
      (Chandler and Joey aren't buying it)
      Monica: ...Alright, we're broke--but cookies do say that!

    • Phoebe: A plate of brownies once told me a limerick.
      Chandler: Pheebs, let me ask you something... Were... were these, uh, "funny" brownies?
      Phoebe: Not especially. But y'know what? I think they had pot in them.

    • Joey: I can't believe it's Christmas already, y'know? I mean... one day you're eatin' turkey, the next thing ya know, your Lords are a-leapin' and your geese are a-layin'.
      Chandler: ...Which is why geese are so relaxed this time of year.

    • Ross: (showing the gang the Christmas presents he bought) I got some, uh, "Hers" and "Hers" towels for Susan and Carol...

    • Monica: (about a shirt Ross got their Mom for Christmas) Look at these authentic fake medals. I tell ya, Mom's gonna be voted best-dressed at the make-believe military academy.

    • Frances: (reading the obituaries) Esther Livingston... (scratching out a name) Gone!
      (Phoebe arrives home)
      Frances: Hi, Pooh.
      Phoebe: Hi Gram. Whatcha doin'?
      Frances: Oh, just updating the phone book.

    • Frances: (pointing at a picture she gave Phoebe, claiming it was of her dad) Alright, that is not your father, that's just a picture of a guy in a frame.
      Phoebe: Oh, God.
      Frances: It was your mother's idea! Y'know... she didn't want you to know your real father because it hurt her so much when he left, and... I didn't want to go along with it, but, well... then she died and, and it was harder to argue with her... Not impossible, but harder.

    • Chandler: Y'know, I remember my father... all dressed up in the red suit, with the big black boots and the leather belt... sneaking around downstairs--he didn't want anybody to see him, but he'd be drunk so he'd stumble, crash into something and wake everybody up.
      Rachel: That doesn't sound like a very merry Christmas.
      Chandler: Who said anything about Christmas?

    • Monica: (about Phoebe) I hope she's okay.
      Joey: Yeah, I know exactly what she's going through.
      Monica: How do you know exactly what she's going through?
      Joey: (finding the question odd) She told us.

    • Ross: Hey, Rach', y'know what? I think I know what'll make you feel better... How 'bout you... make a list about me.
      Rachel: What? Forget it Ross, no... I'm not gonna stand here and make a list of--
      Ross: C'mon, Rachel...
      Rachel: Okay, you're whiny... you are obsessive... you are insecure... you're, you're gutless... Y'know, you don't ever--you don't just sort of seize the day, y'know?--you liked me for what, a year? didn't do anything about it. And, uh... ach! wear too much of that gel in your hair.

    • Phoebe: (to Frances) Hello Grandma--if that is in fact your real name...

    • Joey: Phoebe here with the cab yet?
      Chandler: Yeah, she, she brought the invisible cab... hop in.

    • Phoebe: (in her cab, hands Chandler a piece of paper) Alright, here... you have to hold this.
      Chandler: Okay... (reading from the paper) Brake left, gas right?
      Phoebe: Yeah, that's my cheat sheet.
      Chandler: (suddenly panicked) Where's my seat belt?!
      Phoebe: Oh, no-no... That side doesn't have one--the paramedics had to cut through it.
      (Chandler jumps out of the cab and climbs into the back seat)

    • Monica: (to Ross) For the sixteenth time, no... I do not think you're obsessive!

    • Rachel: Did you just break the radiator?
      Ross: No, I was just turning the knob and, uh... here it is.

    • Ross: (to Monica, about her trying to fix the knob) Oh, oh, that's right! I forgot about your ability to fuse metal.

    • Monica: Hey, it's Funny's cousin, Not Funny!

    • Monica: Look, if worse comes to worse, it gets a little warm, we'll call it a theme party.
      Ross: Hey, here's a theme... "C'mon in... live like bacon!"

    • Ross: (to Rachel) Alright, alright, you know how you say I never seize the day? Well, alright, even though he's your super, I'm seizing... (walks over to Treeger) Mr. Treeger, (handing him some bills) here is fifty bucks... Merry Christmas.
      Mr. Treeger: Oh, wow... I didn't get you anything... (hands Ross one of the bills) Here's five back.
      Ross: No-no, no, that, that's your Christmas tip, alright? Oh, hey... do you think there's a chance you could fix that radiator now?
      Mr. Treeger: No can do. Like I told the girl, I can't get a new knob until Tuesday.
      Monica: Ross.
      Ross: Yeah.
      Monica: Looks like he's playin' baseball!
      Ross: ...You mean "hardball"?
      Monica: ...Whatever.

    • Rachel: (to Ross) Nice seizing... gel boy.

    • Mr. Treeger: (to Rachel) So, uh, is this mistletoe...?
      Rachel: (laughing uncomfortably) No-no, uh... that, that is basil.
      Mr. Treeger: (coyly) Ah... 'cause if it was mistletoe, I was gonna kiss ya.
      Rachel: Ho-ho! Yeah, no, it's still basil.

    • Chandler: (coming into Monica's apartment) Ho, ho, ho--holy crap! it hot in here!

    • Joey: (handing her a blister-pack) Rach', this is for you...
      Rachel: Wiper blades! ...I don't even have a car.
      Joey: (hands her a little spray bottle) No, but with this new car smell, you'll think you do!

    • Joey: (while giving out Christmas presents to the group) ...and for Ross, Mr. Sweet Tooth... (hands him a can of soda) 
      Ross: You got me a cola drink?
      Chandler: And... (hands him a second can) ...a lemon-lime!!
      Ross: Well, this... this is too much. I feel like I should get you another sweater.

  • Notes

    • International Episode Title:
      Czech Republic: Phoebin táta (Phoebe's Dad)

    • Audra Lindley (Frances) is billed as a "special guest star". This was her one and only appearance on Friends as Phoebe's grandmother, although she is mentioned a number of times and we see her taxicab in several episodes.

    • This episode marks James Micheal Tyler's first credited appearance as Gunther. His actual first appearance was in "The One With The Sonogram At The End", the second episode of the series. This is also the first episode in which Gunther speaks, however he only has one line. He was originally an extra, but he was the only one able to work the cappuccino machine, so he became a regular on the show. He is one of the only 4 non-friends to appear in all ten seasons. (The others were Mr. & Mrs. Geller and Janice.) Tyler appeared in 78 of the 238 episodes of Friends, making him second only to the six main cast members for the most appearances.

    • Music: "The Christmas Song" sung by Nat King Cole

    • This episode runs 22:43 on DVD (a typical sitcom runs about 22:00).

  • Allusions

    • After her grandmother gives Phoebe the keys to her cab, Phoebe looks at a picture of Albert Einstein and says, "Wish me luck, grandpa".

    • Joey: I can't believe it's Christmas already, y'know? I mean... one day you're eatin' turkey, the next thing ya know, your lords are a-leapin' and your geese are a-layin'.
      This is a line from the English Christmas carol "The Twelve Days of Christmas."

    • Rachel: (to Phoebe) How have you never been on Oprah?
      Oprah Winfrey is the Emmy Award-winning host of the The Oprah Winfrey Show, the highest-rated talk show in television history.

    • Monica: You guys haven't gotten your presents yet? Tomorrow's Christmas Eve, what are you gonna do?
      Chandler: Don't you have to be Claymation to say stuff like that?
      Claymation, one of the many forms of stop-motion animation, is when each animated piece is made of Plasticine or modeling clay. It is famously used in television Christmas specials.

    • Monica: Oh look, and he did my crossword puzzle.
      Ross: Yeah, but not very well. Unless fourteen across "Gershwin musical" actually is "Bite me bite me bite me bite me."
      George Gershwin was an American composer who composed for Broadway, movies and the classical concert hall.