Season 10 Episode 3

The One with Ross's Tan

Aired Thursday 8:00 PM Oct 09, 2003 on NBC

Episode Fan Reviews (22)

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  • Ross is a 12!!

    So, IMO this and the one with ross' grant are the best ones of the season in terms of funny, cause her the 3 storylines work pefectly. First Joey and Racheld are thying to take the relationship to the next level, but Rachel slaps him everythme he goesnear her ass, much like she laughes whern Ross tried to do the same in season 2, and Joey is unable to undo her bra. Somewhere else, Monica and Phoebe are tyuing to cut off their ives Maanda a snobby girl who was thier frined but is very annyoing has a fake brisitsh accent and always speaks about the famous guys she slept with. She acciedntally revelaeed Phoebe tries to cut off Monica, leading to an argument. ANd finally Ross tries body spray tan but he isunable to count mississippiless-ly so he gets sprayed 6 times on the front and noe on the back, looking very tan, VERY tan. The funiest part here is when Chandler mocks him. Awesome episde, watch it.
  • One of Ross's best

    Okay I'm going to tell you flat out straight. Ross was extremely hilarious in this episode. He spray tanned by six twos and became a twelve on one side and a zeros on the other. I swear I couldn't stop laughing when Ross was constantly messing it up. Monica and Phoebe get a visit from thier old-annoying friend Amanda where Monica learns, that in 1990, Pheobe tried to cut her out. Monica and Pheobe's original plan was for Mike and Chandler to fake a car accident so they could get out of seeing Amanda, but to due Monica's gain of knowledge, she said Mike wasn't there and left Pheobe with Amanda. But after a chat with her in the hallway, things got better. Overall, I found Amanda to be very irratating and hilarious at the same time. Overall one of the best season 10 episodes of Friends.
  • was that place the sun?!?!

    HA HA HA!

    This really is a laugh out loud episode of friends...!

    Ross can't count properly and so ends up getting fake tan sprayed on his front/back too many times... thus ending up looking like he has a rediculous tan, hence chandlers line 'was that place the sun?!'

    The whole mississippi counting thing is hilarious! And then when Ross goes to another tanning place which has the tan spray on both sides... its fantastic!

    The whole Rachel Joey thing is brilliant as well, with Rachel slapping his hand away when they are kissing!

    Overall, I think this is one of the funniest episodes of season 10, Ross is brilliant in this episode!
  • Mississippilessly?

    Ross gets a spray-on tan, but it can't end there! He ends up getting a "12" on his front and a "0" on his back, it's hilarious :). So, as Chandler said, "You could do a duet of 'Ebony and Ivory' all by yourself!" More mishaps with the spray on tan makes this one of my favorite episodes! I mean, who can't get a spray on tan? Ross, the Divorce Force, can't!

    Also, Joey and Rachel have their first official date, which goes pretty okay. But, when they get back to the apartment, everything goes wrong. Rachel can't seem to get through Joey's moves without either giggling or slapping his hand away. Not as funny as the title plotline, but still "Friends" funny, nonetheless!

    And, yet another plotline(I think that great number of plotlines in this episode is the secret to it's funniness, much like TOW They All Turn Thirty) is Monica and Phoebe's old neighbor, Amanda, comes back. She's a little... Over-confident of herself, you could say... But, she's hysterical, and almost as silly as Ross' tan. She's come back with a fake British accent, even though "You're from Yonkers! Your last name is Buffo-Martezi!"(Monica).

    So, to sum it all up, this is at least in the top 10 episodes, maybe in the top 5, so if you haven't seen it yet, WATCH IT!!!
  • Ross' tan and British accents!

    Ross' tan had me rolling on the floor! Ross wants a healthful natural glow, so he visits a tanning salon and ends up looking like a burnt Cheeto! As Ross enters the tanning booth, which is supposed to spray the entire body from head to toe, he is given easy directions of when to expect the spray. "Count to five", says the tanning guy. Simple pimple! You might say, but all the FRIENDS tend to make the easiest things difficult. So, as a result, Ross ends up darker on one side of his body. Trying to remedy the problem, he figures he'll double the side that didn't get any, but as he turns, he's sprayed on the side that was already sprayed! He looks terrible, and worse yet, his teeth seems to glow! The side story, has a friend of Monica and Phoebe's show up in NY wanting to get together after being in London for quite some time. This woman, along with her fake British accent, "musky" natural body aromas, and no talent dance moves, gets on Monica and Phoebe's last nerve. This episode is a must see, for Ross' tan alone.
  • i love this show!! i have it on dvd and i swear that i watch it everyday!!!

    this episode cracks me up becaus ross can't have a perfect or good tan.. the first time he goes in the booth he counts mississipi but he has to count mississipilessly. so he hes two twoes on his chest and face.then he goes back and the same thing happened. so he's an eight. then he goes to an another tanning booth and he doesn't know where to look and so he gets another two twoes and now he's a sixteen!! he really looked ridiculous with that color.. he looked like that he went to the sun!! then rachel and joey can't do it because they are bestfriends and they don't want anything to ruin that. this is what real friendship's means. this episode rocks!!
  • good,

    Joey and Rachel's first date goes well, until they return to their apartment and discover that everything's awkward and they cant have sex or be intimate. So they decide that they are better off as friends, and decide not to go further in the relationship. Monica and Phoebe try to avoid their annoying friend Amanda, who has returned from living in London with a fake British accent. Ross gets a spray-on tan after seeing monica's "hot legs" and decides to get one but it does not go well getting the same tan on his front 3 times very funny indeed.
  • one of the best episodes, i love it!! heres the scritp;)

    [Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment]

    Chandler: So, you and Rachel tonight, huh?

    Joey: Yeah. It's actually our first official date Chandler: Wow! So tonight may be the night! You're nervous?

    Joey: Naa, no. This is the part I'm actually good at.

    Chandler: What must it be like not to be crippled by fear and self-loathing.

    Joey: (pause) It's OK!

    Chandler: How can you be so confident?

    Joey: Well, I... I know exactly what I'm gonna do!

    Chandler: Really? Like you have a routine?

    Joey: No, no no no no. See. Each woman is different.You have to appreciate their uniqueness.

    Chandler: Really?

    Joey: No, I do six things! First, I look deep in her eyes. Then, I kiss her. Next I take my hand and I softly graze her thigh.

    Chandler: You mean like this? (he starts touching his thigh in a funny and awkard way)

    Joey: NO! Not like that, no no. No, like this. (He starts lightly grazing Chandler's thigh)

    Chandler: Oh, I see what you mean, that's quite nice. (They look at each other, both embarassed)

    Joey: More foosball?

    Chandler: ...and OPENING CREDITS

    [Scene:Central Perk. Ross and Chandler are on the couch]

    Monica: (entering) Hey!

    Ross and Chandler: Hey!

    Monica: (to Chandler) Hey sweetie! (they kiss)

    Ross: (looking at Monica's legs) WOW!

    Chandler: Hey! Stop staring at my wife's legs! No no! Stop staring at your sister's legs!

    Ross: I'm sorry, it's just... how did you get so tan?

    Chandler: She went on one of those spray-on tan places.

    Ross: Eh, you got a spray-on tan?

    Monica: Chandler gets pedicures!

    Ross: (laughing) Why, why you do, like with the-the toe separators?

    Chandler: (To Monica) Why...why?

    Ross: Still, I can't believe that's sprayed on... I mean, it looks really good. I wonder if I should get one!

    Chandler: Sure, then you should get a mini skirt so you can really show it off.

    Ross: So, do you get colours or just French tips?

    Monica: There. Here's their card.

    Ross: Thanks. (he takes the card) Hey, I know where this place is! It used to be an X-rated video... (pauses when he realizes what he is saying) florist. (he goes away)

    (Phoebe enters)

    Phoebe: Hey!

    Chandler: Hey Pheebs!

    Monica: Hey Phoebe!

    Phoebe: Oh, you won't believe who moved back to town.

    Monica: I know, Amanda! Ah! She called me too! She's the worst!

    Chandler: Who's Amanda?

    Monica: She's this girl who used to live in the building before you did. Then she moved to England and she picked up this fake British accent. On the machine this is her message. (she apes Amanda using an awful British accent) "Monica, darling! It's Amanda calling!"

    Chandler: Are you trying to do a British accent?

    Monica: (pause) (to Phoebe) Chandler gets pedicures!

    Chandler: Just so I know, how many more of those can I expect?

    Phoebe: You know what Amanda said to me when she got me on the phone? (apes Amanda in a british accent) "Oh, so sorry to catch you on your Mo-Bile!" If-if you don't wanna get me on my mo-Bile, don't call me on my mo-Bile!"

    Monica: I know, and she's always bragging about all the famous people she's met.

    Phoebe: Oh, I know! "Oh...I slept with Billy Joel". All right, who hasn't?

    Monica: Oh, what are we gonna do! I don't wanna see her!!

    Phoebe: Ugh, Let's just cut her out!

    Monica: What?

    Phoebe: Cut her out of our lives! Just ignore her calls and dodge her 'till she gets the point!

    Monica: Oh, I guess we could try that, but... it seems so harsh! (to Chandler) Have you ever done that?

    Chandler: No, had it done to me though. Feels good !

    [Scene: At the tanning salon. Ross and a male assistant are walking through a hall]

    Assistant: Alright Mr. Geller! Right this way! So, how dark do you wanna be? We have one, two or three. Ross: Well... I like how you look, what are you?

    Assistant: Puerto Rican.

    Ross: Two, I think a two.

    Assistant: You've got to face the red light. When the red light goes on the spraying is about to start so close your eyes. When the spraying stops, count to five. Pat yourself down to avoid drip marks then turn around so we can get your back. Got it?

    Ross: Spray, count, pat, then turn, spray, count and pat.

    Assistant: Wow, you catch on quick.

    Ross: Well, I have a PhD, so... (assistant walk out, not impressed by this statement)
    (Ross takes his bathrobe off and he enters the tanning booth. He stands up in front of the red light and the sprayer starts and sprays his face and torso)

    Ross: One Mississipi, two Mississipi, Three Mis...(the sprayer starts again, spraying him in the face and torso again) WAIT! WAIT! I'm not-I've not finished counting!! (he leaves the booth) (the assistant enters the room)

    Ross: You sprayed my front twice!

    Assistant: You've never turned?

    Ross: No, I barely even got to three Mississippi. Assistant: Mississippi? I said count to five'!

    Ross: Mississippilesly? (pause) Well, how bad is it?

    Assistant: Ain't that bad yet, but it keeps getting darker for the next four hours.

    Ross: So, how dark is it gonna get?

    Assistant: You got sprayed with two two' s and...

    Ross: I'm a four?

    Assistant: Yeah, but you're back's a zero. You're gonna wanna even that out.

    Ross: (sarcastically) Really!

    Assistant: You might wanna get back in there.

    Ross: (annoyed) Ok!

    (The assistant leaves and Ross goes back in the spray-on tan booth and turns his back to the spray nozzles, facing the back wall)

    Ross: Wait, wait a minute, there's no light on the back wall! How do I know when it's gonna start? Hello? (he slowly turns and the spraying begins, on his face) Ah, oh, ah! (he turns, but then he turns again and is sprayed in the front again) Ah! (he spits and angrily goes out of the spray-on tan booth and the assistant enters the room) The same thing happened again!

    Assistant: You got two more twos?

    Ross: (hysterically) I'm an eight!

    [Scene: Joey’s apartment. Joey and Rachel enter the room]

    Rachel: Thanks for dinner. Joey: I thought you paid. (Rachel does not answer and seems puzzled) Ha, guess we won’t be going back there!

    Rachel: So.

    Joey: Yeah.

    (Joey and Rachel start kissing)

    Joey: Hey what do you say, we move this onto the likes of the couch?

    Rachel: I say ‘cheesy line’, but ok.

    (They move on the couch and start kissing again. Joey does his grazing on Rachel’s thigh and she slaps his hand)

    Joey: What’s the matter?

    Rachel: I am sorry, I don’t know, I am sorry, I don’t know why I did that!

    Joey and Rachel: Okay

    Rachel: Ok, so sorry.

    (They start kissing again and, when Joey grazes her thigh, she slaps him on his hand again)

    Rachel: I am sorry! Again... I don't know, I don’t know what happened, I must be nervous!

    Joey: I don’t get it, Chandler loved it!

    Rachel: Ok, ok, ok. I promise, I promise, I promise, I won’t do it again. I really do. I promise. This is gonna be great.

    Joey: Ok.

    (They start kissing again and when Joey grazes, she slaps him three times, on the hand, and on both cheeks)

    Joey: (a little giddy) Uh, was that good for you?

    [Scene: Monica’s apartment. Monica and Phoebe are reading magazines when the phone rings and Phoebe reaches to pick it up]

    Monica: (to Phoebe) No, no, don’t get it. Let the machine pick up. Phoebe: Oh, yeah. Could be Rachel asking if someone could baby-sit again.

    Monica: It could be Amanda!

    Phoebe: Oh, you’re right! I was just kidding about Rachel. Babysitting is a gas!

    (The machine picks up the phone)

    Amanda: Hello Monica. It’s Amanda calling again. I am in the neighborhood hoping I can pop by your flat!

    Monica: You're from Yonkers! Your last name is Buffo-Martisis!

    Amanda: Let’s see.. to assure you get this directly, ring me back on my mobile.

    Phoebe: Ok, don’t hold thy breath!

    (Sound of dialing numbers is heard from the speaker of the machine)

    Chandler: Hello? Is someone on the line?

    Amanda: Yes, I was looking for Monica.

    Chandler: Hang on, she’s right here. (he enters the living room and hands the phone to Monica) Someone's on the phone, for ya.

    Monica: We weren’t picking up, it’s Amanda!

    Chandler: (to Amanda) I get pedicures!

    Monica: Hi Amanda! Actually now... it’s... is not a good time. Dinner tomorrow night? (Phoebe mouths 'no') Ok, Phoebe and I will see you then!

    Phoebe: Why, why, why didn’t you just say no!

    Monica: Well, I said 'no' to her coming over now! I couldn’t say 'no' twice! I get this uncontrollable need to please people!

    Phoebe: (leaving) Fine, fine! You would not hold up well under torture!

    Monica: And you would?

    Phoebe: I did!

    [scene: Joey’s apartment. Joey and Rachel are sitting on the couch]

    Joey: Rach, you sure you wanna do this? Rachel: Absolutely! Absolutely. I d... it’s just a little weird, it’s you, and it’s me, it's just gonna take some getting used to.

    Joey: Ok. Well, how, how can we make it easier?

    Rachel: Ok, let’s work from the top down! (Joey nods, but then puzzled because he does not get it) Just work the bra, Joe!

    Joey: Ok, yeah, got it.

    Rachel and Joey: Okay.

    (They start kissing and Joey starts to undo her bra, but fails completely)

    Joey: This thing welded shut?!

    Rachel: Okay.

    Joey: All right, turn around, I got to get a look at this thing.

    Rachel: Oh!

    (Joey starts trying to undo her bra, but it won’t go.The elastic band snaps back, hurting Rachel.)

    Rachel: Ow!

    Joey: Sorry!

    Rachel: Well this is romantic!

    Joey: I'm sorry! (He stands up) This never happened to me before! I'm an expert at taking off bras! I can do it with one hand! I can do it with my eyes closed! One time I just looked at one, and it popped open! I blame your bra!

    Rachel: It’s a standard issue bra clasp!

    Joey: Then I blame you! Yeah! That's right! You threw me off with all your slapping!

    Rachel: Ok well, well I'm really, I'm sorry about that Joey, but do you think that maybe on some level, you don't want to take off my bra?

    Joey: (contemplates for a few moments what Rachel just said) NAH! I don't have another level!! [Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment]

    (Chandler is at the table reading; Monica puts some food for him on the table. Ross walks in looking very tanned. Chandler and Monica look up at him smiling.) Chandler: Hold on! There is something different.

    Ross: I went to that tanning place your wife suggested.

    Chandler: Was that place... The Sun?

    Ross: Oh! And it gets worse! (Turns his side to Chandler and Monica and pulls up his shirt. There's a distinct line across his body, where his belly is very tanned and his back is very pale.)

    Chandler: Oh My God! You can do a duet of Ebony and Ivory all by yourself!

    Monica: How could you mess this up? It's so easy? You go into the booth, you count to five and you turn around!!

    Ross: (looks at her suspiciously) How do you count to five?

    Monica: One Two Three...

    Ross: (Yells) (Goes to the door to leave. Rachel just enters, sees him and starts laughing)

    Rachel: (laughing) oooh! Oh oh!

    Ross: (Still yelling) I Know!

    Rachel: oh oh! What is up with Miss Hawaiian Tropic?

    Chandler: How was your date with Joey?

    Rachel: Well, it was good.. until we got back to our apartment, and then we were fooling around and he started to put his hand up my leg and I kept slapping it away!

    Chandler: You didn't like that?

    Rachel: Well, it wasn't just me, alright? He freaked out too! He couldn't even undo my !

    Monica: Wow, really? One time he just looked at my and it popped open.

    (Chandler starts looking at her bra)

    Rachel: I do not know what's wrong with us, I mean, we have kissed before and that's been great! But this time it was leading somewhere and I was very aware of the fact that it was Joey touching me.

    Monica: Well, you guys have been friends forever. Remember the first time that you kissed Ross? How weird that was? You couldn't stop laughing? You got through that.

    Rachel: (looking thoughtful) Ok, that's true. That's true, we can do this. You're right, you're right, we can do this. We're just gonna power through!

    (Joey walks in)

    Joey: Hey Chandler can I talk to you for a second (points to the hall).

    Rachel: (To Joey) No need!! Problem solved, we are powering through (At which point she grabs his hand and pulls him back to their apartment).

    (Chandler resumes staring at Monica's bra)

    Monica: (sees what he is doing) Chandler, stop! It is not going to pop open!

    Chandler: (without taking his eyes off the bra) You don't know! (Monica just smiles)

    [Scene: Central Perk.]

    (Phoebe is sitting on the couch. Monica walks in.) Monica: Hey Phoebe!

    Phoebe: Hey!

    Monica: Is Amanda here yet?

    Phoebe: No.

    Monica: (sits down) Oh good. Good, look I'm so sorry, for screwing up that cutting-her-out plan. But I have a new plan. Chandler agreed to call here in a few minutes with an emergency.

    Phoebe: Oh! Well, what kind of emergency that gets us both out of here?

    Monica: Well, what do you think of Mike and Chandler being in a car accident?

    Phoebe: (makes a face) Are you kidding, I love it!

    (A blonde woman walks in. Supposedly Amanda)

    Phoebe: Hi!

    Monica: Hi!

    Amanda: Hi! (Phoebe and Amanda hug)

    Amanda: (To Monica) Hello!

    (Monica holds her hands out for a hug, but instead of hugging her, Amanda hangs her purse on one of Monica's extended arms.)

    Amanda: (In a fake British accent) It's so nice to see you! Both of you! Look at me. Look how young I look! (gives her coat to Monica as well) Oh gosh! We have so much to catch up on! But first things first: touch my abs (at which point she grabs both Phoebe and Monica's hands and places them both on her stomach) I don't exercise at all! (she pulls them down to sit.) Oh gosh, so Monica, you're married!

    Monica: (beaming) Yeah! Yeah! His name is Chandler and...

    Amanda: (To Phoebe) Smell my neck! (Phoebe does so) It's not perfume! It's me! It's my natural scent!

    (Monica looks shocked)

    Phoebe: Musty!

    Amanda: Oh! Gosh! This is brilliant. Gosh, it's just like old times. I'm so happy you two are friends again!

    Monica: When were we not friends?

    Amanda: Well, it was 1992, and I remember because that was the year I had sex with Evil Knievel (She starts laughing very proudly).

    Monica: Ehm, we were friends in 1992.

    Amanda: (to Phoebe) No I distinctly remember you were dodging her (points at Monica) calls and trying to avoid seeing her. Monica: (To Phoebe) You were going to cut me out?

    Phoebe: Well...kinda.

    Monica: Oh My God!

    Amanda: Oh! Bugger. Should I not have said that? I feel like a perfect arse!

    Phoebe: Yeah well, in America you're just an "ass".

    (Monica's mobile starts ringing. She picks it up.)

    Monica: (Into the phone) Hello? Chandler, what's wrong? (She listens) Oh my God, are you alright? (listens some more) Yeah, I'll be right there. (She hangs up and speaks to Amanda) I'm so sorry, but Chandler was in a car accident. (She gets up)

    Phoebe: (Also gets up and starts taking her purse) Oh my God. Was Mike with him?

    Monica: Nope! (She turns and leaves)

    [Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment.]

    (Joey comes running in.) Joey: (To Rachel) Hey!

    Rachel: Hey! Got champagne?

    Joey: Yes ma'am, ready to Power through!

    Rachel: Excellent! Stick it in the ice bucket, the phone is off the hook, and in the interest of powering through (Starts to remove her bra from under her clothes)...

    Joey: Uh! (When she's done she throws her bra at him) Rachel: Ok (starts to light some candles) Sexy, sexy, very sexy, sexy. (Claps her hands and jumps at Joey, clearly very excited) Alright! Lets do it!

    Joey: Ok, you're scaring me a little bit.

    Rachel: Oh! Get over it soldier, we've gotta do this! (She pulls him towards her and throws him onto the barcalounger) Ok. Aha! You like that huh?

    Joey: Oh! yeah!

    Rachel: You like that? (She climbs on the barcalounger seductively, putting her knees next to Joey's hips.) Let's take this into high gear (She pulls the barcalounger lever and seat reclines. She puts one of her knees between his legs and begins to kiss his neck.)

    Joey: uh uh!

    Rachel: Yeah baby, I'll show you how we do it!

    Joey: No, no, no! You kneed me in my misters!

    Rachel: What? Oh my God! I'm so sorry. Joey? Are you ok?

    Joey: (He just sits there, legs very close together with a painful look on his face) Soldier down!

    [Monica and Chandlers apartment.]

    (Chandler is sitting on the couch reading. Monica walks in.) Monica: We are not friends with Phoebe anymore.

    Chandler: If she asks, I protested a little, but ok!

    (Phoebe and Amanda walk in)

    Phoebe: Oh Chandler! Thank God you're alive. Monica, can I talk to you outside for a minute?

    Monica: I have nothing to say to you.

    Amanda: (announces more to herself than anyone else) Wow, my flat is twice this size!

    Phoebe: Please, Monica? In the hall?

    (They both walk to the door and enter the hallway.)

    Amanda: Ooh, that accident must have been terrible. You look positively ghastly.

    Chandler: Well, aren't you a treat.

    [Scene: The hallway]

    Monica: I can't believe you tried to cut me out. Why Phoebe, why?

    Phoebe: It was right after we were living together and you were driving me crazy, okay? You were really controlling and compulsive and shrill.

    Monica: I'm still all those things!

    Phoebe: You're also so generous and kind and scrappy!

    Monica: (starts smiling) I am scrappy.

    Phoebe: Exactly! Look, no matter what I tried to do, I couldn't keep you out of my life. Of all the people I have cut out, you were the only one who ever clawed her way back in.

    Monica: It's because I'm scrappy.

    Phoebe: Yeah, you are. And I'm so glad that you fought your way back in, because I don't know what I would do without you.

    Monica: I won't know what I would do without you.

    (They hug)

    Monica: Well, I guess we should go back in. When you gave me another chance, I guess we should do the same for Amanda.

    Phoebe: Yeah, I guess you're right.

    (They both enter the apartment again, where Amanda is "dancing" for Chandler, but she's really terrible at it)

    Amanda: Can you believe it. I've never had any professional dance training.

    (Monica and Phoebe look at each other and leave the apartment again)

    [Scene: A different spray-on tan center]

    (Glenda, who works here, and Ross are walking to the room with the spray-on tan booth.) Glenda: Now, let me explain how this works. You go into the booth, and...

    Ross: I'm gonna stop you right there, Glenda. Okay? Does it look like this is my first time, huh? Now I want 4 two's... and I want them all on my back.

    Glenda: (quietly) Okay...

    (Ross enters the room, takes off his robe and enters the booth. He stands with his back to the nozzles and then realises that this booth has nozzles at both sides of the wall)

    Ross: Wait a minute, there's two sets of nozzles, which one is it?

    (He turns around frantically from side to side.)

    Ross: Which... which... which... Which one is it?

    (He then stops turning, facing one of the nozzles, which starts spraying in this face and front again.)

    Ross: OH! (He now turns to the other side, which also starts spraying his face and front.)

    [Scene: Joey and Rachel's]

    (Joey and Rachel are both sitting on the couch. Joey keeping his knees pressed against each other) Rachel: What is the matter with us?

    Joey: Well, I know what's the matter with me.

    Rachel: No, I mean with us, you know. I mean, is it supposed to be this... difficult?

    Joey: I don't know.

    (Chandler enters the apartment)

    Chandler: That fake British woman is a real **** but she sure can dance... Hey!

    Rachel: Hi! Hey, listen, can we ask you a question? When you and Monica first hooked up, was it weird going from friends to... more than that?

    Chandler: Kinda... you know, sneaking around, having to hide from you guys...

    Rachel: No, no, no... No, I mean... se-x-u-ally...

    Joey: Yeah, was there a part of you that... felt like it was... really wrong?

    Chandler: Actually, no. No, it felt right. You know, it felt like uhm... I can't believe we haven't been doing this the whole time.

    (Rachel and Joey are still looking at Chandler, slowly letting his words get to them)

    Chandler: I can tell from your expressions that that's the good news you were hoping for... Well, I'm gonna go continue to... spread the joy.(Chandler leaves the apartment. Joey sighs)

    Rachel: Well, just because it happened that way for them doesn't mean it has to happen that way for us.

    Joey: Yeah, yeah... Absolutely. I mean, just because something's difficult doesn't mean that you quit.

    Rachel: Right, totally.

    Joey: Yeah, so we just keep trying and trying until we... do it.

    Rachel: Yeah, and if doesn't work, then we'll be just one of those couples that never have sex.

    Joey: That's a... pla-an.

    (They both stare for a while, and then look at each other)

    Joey: (sighs) Wow... I did not see this coming.

    Rachel: I know.

    Joey: I don't get it. I mean, I was so sure this was what I wanted. Rachel: Hmmm... Me too...

    (She puts her head on Joey's shoulder and Joey kisses her on her head.)

    Rachel: I wonder how Monica and Chandler could do it?

    Joey: I guess they weren't as good friends as we are.

    (Lifts her head from Joey's shoulder)

    Rachel: Aah... I bet you're right.

    (They look at each other for a while)

    Joey: So...

    Rachel: Yeah.

    Joey: I love ya.

    Rachel: Love you too... Alright, I'm going to bed.

    Joey: Yeah, me too.

    (Rachel gets up, and Joey tries to get up, but halfway up he sits down again.)

    Joey: Ooh, yeah, I'm not going anywhere for a while.

    (Joey takes the ice-bucket with the champagne bottle in it and puts it on his sore spot)

    ENDING CREDITS [Scene: Ross's apartment.]

    (Ross is reading a National Geographic on his sofa when Chandler knocks on the door.) Chandler: Dude, it's Chandler. Let me in.

    (Ross's face is now a VERY dark shade of brown.)

    Ross: Go away! I don't want to see anybody.

    Chandler: I know, I went to the tanning place and the same thing happened to me. You have to let me in.

    Ross: Really? Did you count Mississipily?

    (Ross walks to the door and opens it.)

    Ross: Dude, you're not tanned.

    Chandler: No, I just had to get a picture of this.

    (Chandler holds up a camera and takes Ross's picture.)

    Chandler: I see you later!

    (Ross closes the door)
  • Made me laugh through out the entire show

    When Amanda (Jenifer Coolidge) comes into town Monica and Phoebe try to get rid of her. When Ross gets a spray on tan he ends up a little... darker then usual but only on one side. And Joey and Rachel give their realtionship a try will little avail. It's a series of unfortunate events that leads to a happy and satisfied viewer. The quips that Jenifer Coolidge threw out (in her fake British accent) left me gasping for breath. It certainly was a wonderful performance. And the scenes with Ross getting his tan kept me smiling until I couldn't smile. This was a special episode that I will cherish forever.
  • Really underated-it deserves more

    Joey and Rachel\'s first date goes well, until they return to their apartment and discover that everything\'s awkward. They decide that they are better off as friends, and decide not to go further in the relationship. Monica and Phoebe try to avoid their annoying friend Amanda, who has returned from living in London with a fake British accent. Ross gets a spray-on tan, that does not go well. I think that this episode is really underated, i thought it was great episode(like nearly all the others)but this really stands out in series 10 as it is one of my faveroutes.Amanda was hilarious and i thought ross\' tan disasta was a brilliant storyline.
  • High-Lear-Ee-Us

    Oh My God (In Janice voice), This episode nearly had me wetting my pants. Just based purely on Ross getting his tan "I said count to 5" "Mississippilisly?" So funny!!!!

    Anyone after a decent laugh, so much so that you're still laughing 10 minutes after Ross has gotten his tan, needs to watch this episode. I'm still giggling about it "I'm an Eight?!!!"

    Monica and Phoebes old friend Amanda stops by from England and the girls try to cut her out but it comes out that Phoebe once tried to cut Monica out. They make up in the end.

    And Rachel and Joey rethink their relationship when they can't seem to sleep together because it feels too weird. Chandler intercepts in the storylines, giving Rachel and Joey advice, Helping Monica deal with Amanda and making fun of Ross' tan.

    Honestly one of the funniest episode I've ever seen of any show.
  • Its hilarious. Ross gets a tan, Amanda comes over, and some trouble occurs with Joey and Rachel.

    When Ross sees that Monica got a tan, he decides to get one for himself so he orders a number 2 for a spray on tan. Everything goes wrong when he counts wrong. A day later he finds that the tan is all uneven and wrong.

    Amanda comes to vistit Monica and Phoebe. Monica and Phoebe hate her so they try to cut her out, while doing that, Phoebe discovers that Monica tried to cut her out in the past and they get into a fight.

    Its Joey and Rachel's first date and when they get back to their apartment, they get into some trouble. The next day, they "power-through" but still have trouble so they break up.
  • My favorite episode

    This is my favorite episode of Friends. Over all, a lot of my favorite moments happended in season 10. The best part of this episode is, ofcourse, when Ross gets his spray-on tan. I love when the Spray-tan-guy ask "You got two more twos?", and Ross replies "I'm an eight!". Such desperation in those three words, I just love it! This episode also holds the worlds worst break-up. When Rachel and Joey break up, you almost wish for a breakup fight, like "We were on a break!", but instead it's very lame. They could have done that part very differently.
  • Amanda comes...

    Great episode! Joey and Rachel's first date goes well, until they return to their apartment and discover that everything's awkward. They decide that they are better off as friends, and decide not to go further in the relationship. Monica and Phoebe try to avoid their annoying friend Amanda, who has returned from living in London with a fake British accent. Ross gets a spray-on tan, that does not go well.
  • Once again Ross is in an unbelievable situation

    Friends Season 10 Episode 3 The One With Ross's Tan
    Ross goes to a tanning place, but a confusion makes him look really really but really tan. Rachel and Joey try to sleep together, but decide they are better as friends. Phoebe and Monica try to cut off a friend, but she reveals Phoebe tried to cut off Monica before.

    This episode, the one with Ross's tan, was amazingly funny. Is so great, and so unbelievable that that smae fact makes it funnier! It was also funny the plot with Monica and Phoebe, and "I feel like a perfect arse!" "Actually in America you're only an ass." was my favorite of it! Also one of my favorites was also "How do you count to 5?" "1,2,3..." "Damn it!"
    With Rachel's and Joey's plot, it was funny, but I dont really like the idea of Joey and Rachel dating. It got weird. Overall, a great episode.
  • Mississippi? I said count to five!

    Mississippilesly? I just love scenes with Ross in this episode! I laughed so hard when he got spray-on tan just on his face all those times! "Ross: One Mississipi, two Mississipi, Three Mis..."- his counting was hilarious!!!
    "Ross: I went to that tanning place your WIFE suggested!
    Chandler: Was that place... The Sun?
    Ross: Ohh! And it gets worse! Chandler: Oh My God! You can do a duet of Ebony and Ivory all by yourself!"
    I didn't like the part between Rachel an Joey... I never liked the idea of them being together and I couldn't imagine them sleeping together. I am glad that they didn't but the way it happened- with the slapping and kicking....that I didn't like at all!!
  • I love this episode. Ross is hilarious who can't get a fake tan? Ross obviously can't

    I love this episode, Ross can't tan. I mean who counts with Mississippi after the number? Ross obviously. I can't believe he was like sixteen on the front side and zero on the back. It was hilarious to watch his reactions were priceless. Joey and Rachel's story line was also hilarious. I love this episode a lot. Monica and Pheobe's story line wasn't as good as the other two in the episode. I don't know why but it wasn't as funny. The episode on a whole was pretty good and definitely a fine example of how awesome the show is.
  • "I get pedicures." - Chandler

    Rachel and Joey go on their first date and everything goes great untill they go back to the apartment and start making out. Then they find out that things don't just don't work between them. I never wanted these two together but still the ending was kinda sad.
    Phoebe and Monica try to cut a fake British woman out of their life. But she reveals that in 1992 Phoebe tried to cut Monica out of her life. She gets mad about that but they make up when she finds out that she is the only one that Phoebe wasn't able to cut out of her life.
    Ross tries to get a tan at a tanning salon but, well he's probably the only one in the world who can screw that up.
    Chandler didn't have much to do in this episode apart from his pedicure line and the picture he took of a very tanned Ross.
  • Ross sees Monicas new tan and being impressed, he goes to get one too. But when he misunderstands the instructions, he ends up being insanely orange. Meanwhile Monica & Pheobe try to 'fase out' there big headed friend and Rachel & Joey go on a first date.

    This episode is one of my many favourite episodes of friends. Some scenes involving Ross's plot will leave you in stiches and are hilarious, it is a true classic Friends subplot! Any friends lover will see the comedy and will have you in a fit of giggles! Monica and Pheobe's plot is also very funny as you see them with a very funny guest star. The story is very funny and also has some memorable friends moments. Joey and Rachel's plot is fairly funny but not quite as good s the other two. However I still thought it was an awesome Friends episode! This is another great episode and I would reccomend it to anyone who is in need of a good laugh! :)
  • Ross gets a spray-on tan that does some damage. Phoebe and Monica's old 'friend' from the apartment makes an unwelcoming visit. Joey and Rachel have their first date which goes great until they get back to the apartment and the awkwardness takes over.

    I, and I think I can say most people agree, was a Ross and Rachel fan. It was obvious throughout the series, but despite that, I don't think they took the Joey-Rachel relationship seriously enough. Granted, the best friends thing got in the way, and it would for almost anyone in their situation, but I still think they could have strung out this plot point a little bit longer than 3 episodes.
  • Good mix of skillful acting and physical comedy

    This is an episode (uncommon for the series, really), in which the writing, while acceptable, takes a back seat to the performances. Ross's scene in the tanning booth is completely in character and one of the finest examples of physical comedy in the series, the behavior of Monica's ill-mannered friend Amanda (played exuberantly by Jennifer Coolidge) is refreshingly appalling ("Wow, that accident must have been terrible! You look positively ghastly!"), and the entire cast gave brisk and effortless deliveries of their somewhat predictable lines (Joey: "I'm an expert at taking off bras").

    Last but not least, it was a tremendous relief to finally put the implausible pairing of Rachel and Joey to rest--that relationship seemed forced from the beginning.
  • Ross Storyline stupid

    I can take some liberty with the fact that it is a comedy and therefore, some if humor value. But everytime I see this episode, I just can't believe anyone would be in the situation that Ross was, and not just immediatly turn around when they started getting their front sprayed AGAIN and AGAIN and AGAIN. It just annoys me. It is nice to know that as smart as Ross is he lacks common sense... but this lack of common sense is like... truely annoying.

    Amanda however... it is funny to see how she plays between Phoebe and Rachel. It is nice that they show they weren't always friends.

    The edited for 30 minutes on TBS... it sucks some of the things they cut out. Not as funny