Friends

Season 9 Episode 21

The One with the Fertility Test

5
Aired Thursday 8:00 PM May 01, 2003 on NBC
8.7
out of 10
User Rating
190 votes
2

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Episode Summary

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Chandler and Monica court embarrassment when they secretly go to a fertility clinic for tests that will determine their family plans, until an old acquaintance runs into them. Ross hides his feelings for Charlie to help Joey woo her. Rachel sneaks into a spa for a massage and hopes that Phoebe won't find out and feel betrayed.moreless

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SUBMIT REVIEW
  • Great!!

    9.0
    This was a great episode!! Rachels says she won't go to a spa and it turns out Phoebe works there. Phoebe was sp funny with her Swedish accent but I knew from the beginning it was her but the sound of her voice. Good try Phoebe and even at the end when she trys it a again with a scotish accent. Chandler and Monica go to a fertility clinc to see whats wrong and that both of them have a problem with conceving.moreless
  • funny

    10
    Chandler and Monica court embarrassment when they secretly go to a fertility clinic for tests that will determine their family plans, until an old acquaintance runs into them name of janice and they are really peeved to see her there. Ross hides his feelings for Charlie to help Joey woo her what a good friend ross is. Rachel sneaks into a spa for a massage and hopes that Phoebe won't find out and feel betrayed but it turns out that pheobe works there and then pheobe swears to stop working there if rachael stops going, but they betray eachother again by still going and working there.moreless
Debra Azar

Debra Azar

Spa Receptionist

Guest Star

Myra Turley

Myra Turley

Nurse

Guest Star

Aisha Tyler

Aisha Tyler

Charlie Wheeler

Recurring Role

Maggie Wheeler

Maggie Wheeler

Janice

Recurring Role

Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions

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  • TRIVIA (6)

    • Trivia: The words Joey had memorized for Days of Our Lives, fronto-temporal-zygomatic craniotomy, actually refers to a craniotomy where a simple and safe procedure is performed without any instrumentation or plating techniques in which the dissection distance is shortened and there is a wider, shallower operating field. Joey believes it means someone gets attacked by a bear.

    • Goof: Phoebe rips Rachel's gift certificate into four parts. However, the taped-up certificate Rachel hands the receptionist was torn into eight pieces.

    • Continuity: In this episode its shown that Charlie has not been to New York before. However in "The One with Ross's Grant" she talks to Benjamin about them being at a restaurant in New York a few years ago.

    • Magna Doodle: "Happy Birthday Gizzy 5-1-91" with a drawing of a lion.

    • Continuity: At the start of this episode the gang is talking about what happened at the soap opera roof party the previous night. However, the previous episode did not end with the party, but with Chandler, Monica and Phoebe attending a performance of the one woman show, presumably the night after the soap opera party. The plot seems to have jumped forward and backwards in time.

    • Continuity: Monica says to Chandler that they have been trying to have a baby for over a year. But they only decided to try for a baby at the hospital when Emma is being born and Emma's first birthday isn't until season ten.

  • QUOTES (15)

    • Ross: (About Charlie) You should take her to the MET.
      Joey: The Metsss!
      Ross: Oh, no! The MET! The Metropolitan Museum of Art.
      Joey: (realizing) Oh, that's what she meant! You know, if they're gonna shorten it, they should call it the MUSE. You know, short for museum, and avoid all the confusion.
      Ross: Yeah, most of the time it's a place packed with confused angry baseball fans.

    • Monica: Hey, what's this?
      Rachel: Oh, it's a gift certificate to this new SPA in Soho.
      Monica: Oh, you can't show Phoebe this. She hates those corporate massage chains.
      Rachel: Ah, why, now I can't get a massage? There are so many things that she disapproves of. I can't eat veal, I can't wear fur, I can't go hunting...
      Monica: Do you wanna go hunting?
      Rachel: Well, I would like to have the option!

    • Monica: (At the fertility office) Don't worry. There's nobody here that knows you.
      Janice: Oh... my... God!
      Chandler: Oh, come on!

    • Janice: Well, somebody's a little cranky today because they have to do it in a cup. Oh look, they gave you the kiddie size!
      Chandler: What!?
      (Janice laughs annoyingly)
      Monica: This has been fun, but I have an invasive vaginal exam to get to!

    • Ross: When you go into the museum, you turn right. That's the Antiquities Wing. Ancient Egypt, Mesopotamia, right up to the Byzantine Empire.
      Joey: Whoa. Okay, so I go in the door and make a right?

    • Monica: That's so weird. How did Joey end up kissing Charlie last night? I thought you'd end up kissing Charlie.
      Ross: Hey, I thought I'd end up kissing Charlie too, okay? But surprise!
      Chandler: I missed most of the party. Charlie is a girl, right?
      Ross: Yes, she is this new professor in my department that I did not kiss.
      Rachel: I don't know why Joey had to kiss her! I mean, of all the girls at the party, God!
      Ross: Why do you care so much?
      Monica: Yes Rachel, why do you care so much?
      Rachel: (worried) Because Ross is the father of my child! You know... and I... want him to hook up with lots of women! I just... All I'm saying is... I don't think that Joey and Charlie have anything in common.
      Ross: Oh, I don't know, they seem to have a shared interest in each other's tonsils.
      Phoebe: Wow, Joey and a professor! Can you imagine if they had kids and if the kids got her intelligence and Joey's raw sexual magnetism... Oh, those nerds will get laid!

    • Chandler: (About the fertility test) How do I know that they're not gonna secretly videotape me and then put it all over the internet?
      Monica: Because, honey, I mean this in the sweetest way possible, nobody is gonna wanna watch that.

    • Chandler: But I don't wanna do it in a cup.
      Monica: What is the big deal?
      Chandler: It's weird! In a doctor's office?
      Monica: It's not okay to do it in a doctor's office, but it is okay to do it in a parked car behind a Taco Bell?

    • Monica: Hey honey, what do you wanna do tonight?
      Chandler: Oh, uh, maybe we could uh... (He shoves everything off the table and winks)
      Monica: Okay, trying to turn me on by making a mess? Know your audience!

    • Phoebe: (About her new shoes) They used to belong to the late Shania Twain.
      Rachel: Phoebe, Shania Twain is still alive.
      Phoebe: Oh, then I overpaid!

    • Charlie: First, I have to see the Met!
      Joey: Okay, let me stop you right there, the Mets suck. You wanna see the Yankees!
      Charlie: No not the Mets, the Met..singular.
      Joey: Which one, they all suck!
      Charlie: The museum.
      Joey: I don't think so.

    • Joey: She's so much smarter than all the girls I've ever dated. Combined! I just don't want her to think I'm stupid.
      Ross: Are you wearing two belts?
      Joey: Hey, what do you know!

    • Rachel: Hey, say, you'll know this. What's the capital of Sweden?
      Phoebe: Um, Stockholm.
      Rachel: Damn, I wish I knew if that was right.

    • Ross: I'm really impressed that you were able to memorize all this so quickly.
      Joey: I'm an actor. I can memorize anything. Last week I had to say "Frontal Temporal Zygomatic Craniotomy."
      Ross: Wow, what does that mean?
      Joey: No idea. But the guy I said it to dies in the next scene, so I guess it means, you're going to get eaten by a bear.

    • Chandler: Apparently, my sperm have low motility, and you have an inhospitable environment.
      Monica: Oh. What does that mean?
      Chandler: It means that my guys won't get off their barcaloungers, and you have a uterus that is prepared to kill the ones that do.

  • NOTES (3)

  • ALLUSIONS (5)

    • Spa Receptionist: (To Rachel, pretentiously) Have a seat through the glass doors.
      Rachel: (imitating her) Through the glass doors?
      Spa Receptionist: Through the glass doors.
      Rachel (With a fake smile) Alrighty then.

      "Alrighty then" was the catch phrase of Ace Ventura (Jim Carrey) in the 1994 film Ace Ventura: Pet Detective. The film also starred Courteney Cox.

    • Phoebe: It's a normal Swedish name... IKEA.

      IKEA is a Swedish manufacturing company that mass produces furniture and other items that can be bought cheaply and self assembled by the purchaser.

    • Joey: Caravaggio uses chiaroscuro here to highlight the anguish of the central figure.

      Joey is alluding to Michelangelo Merisi da Caravaggio, an Italian artist. "Chiaroscuro" is a painting technique that creates volume by depicting light and shade through bold contrasts.

    • Phoebe: (Showing a pair of shoes) They belonged to the late Shania Twain.

      Shania Twain is a country singer (and as Rachel corrects Phoebe) who is still alive.

    • Joey: Monet painted quickly and often outdoors as his elusive subject was light itself.

      Claude Monet is credited with beginning the art movement known as Impressionism. He was interested in how the colors of his subjects changed depending on the weather and time of day.

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