Season 3 Episode 3

The One with the Jam

Aired Thursday 8:00 PM Oct 03, 1996 on NBC



  • Trivia

    • Goof: In the scene where Ross tells Rachel that they are alone in an empty apartment, while he is leading her into the living room, the crew lights are visible at the top of the screen.

    • Goof: In the tag scene when Ross hits Chandler with his rolled up magazine, he only folds over one-third of the magazine. When it cuts to him hitting Chandler the magazine is fully folded over.

    • Goof: When Phoebe is talking to Ursula's stalker for the first time, her hands constantly move places, whenever the shot changes, with no time to do so.

    • Goof: About five minutes into the episode during a conversation between Chandler, Ross, and Rachel in the girls' apartment, a shadow can be seen passing behind the closet door in the back. This happens while the three friends are the only ones in the apartment, meaning that someone else was walking by backstage.

    • Goof: In the scene where Malcolm, played by David Arquette, is talking to Phoebe in the subway, you can hear him but his lips aren't moving.

    • Trivia: When Rachel comes out of the bathroom, she is wearing two different socks. The same thing happened in the previous episode, "The One Where No One's Ready".

  • Quotes

    • Monica: Hey, look at me! I'm making jam... been at it since four o'clock this morning.
      Ross: Where'd you get fruit at four in the morning?
      Monica: Went down to the docks. (to Rachel) Hey... Betcha didn't know you can get it wholesale.
      Rachel: I didn't know there were docks.

    • Rachel: (about the sling on Joey's arm) Did you tell the doctor you did it jumping up and down on your bed?
      Joey: No. I had a whole cover story, but Chandler, here, sold me out.
      Chandler: Well, I'm sorry Joe... I didn't think the doctor would buy that it just fell out of the socket.

    • Joey: Oh, Jam? I love jam! (to Chandler) Hey, how come we never have jam at our place?
      Chandler: (faking tears) Because the kids need new shoes!

    • Monica: I'm going into business, people--I needed a plan... a plan to get over my man. And what's the opposite of man...? Jam!

    • Chandler: Do I look fat?
      Ross & Rachel: No.
      Chandler: Okay, I accept that. When Janice asked me and I said no, she took that to mean that I was calling her a cow.

    • Chandler: Okay, well Janice said, "Hi, do I look fat today?" So I looked at her...
      Ross: Whoa, whoa, whoa. You looked at her? You never look. You just answer--it's like a reflex. Do I look fat?--No!

    • Ross: Let's say Janice is coming back from a trip and she gives you two options. Option number one, she'll take a cab home from the airport, or option number two, you can meet her at baggage claim. What do you do?
      Chandler: That's easy, baggage claim.
      Ross: Ennnh! Wrong! Now you're single. It's actually secret option number three... you meet her at the gate. That way she knows you love her.

    • Chandler: Janice likes to cuddle at night--which you know I am all for--but, uh... You know when you want to go to sleep, you want some space. So, uh... how do I tell her that, without, y'know... accidentally calling her fat or something?
      Rachel: Oh, honey, I'm sorry we can't help you there 'cause we're cuddly sleepers! (kisses Ross, then checks her watch and gets up to leave) Okay, I'm late for work... Are you guys gonna come down?
      Ross: Uh, yeah, yeah, I'm right behind you.
      Rachel: Okay... Good luck, Chandler!
      Chandler: Thank-you, Rachel. 
      Ross: (after Rachel has left) Okay, the sleeping thing... Very tricky business, but there is something you can do.
      Chandler: (mockingly) But I thought you guys were "cuddly" sleepers.
      Ross: No! No, not cuddly, not me, I'm like you... I need the room.

    • Joey: Remember when you were a kid, and your mom would drop you off at the movies with a jar of jam and a little spoon?
      Rachel: (with a patronizing smile) You're so pretty.

    • Phoebe: Okay, first... I'm not crazy. And second... say it, don't spray it.

    • Phoebe: I asked for the news, not the weather.

    • Chandler: Okay Joe, I gotta ask. The hot girl from the xerox place buck naked (he gestures with his one hand), or a big tub of jam (he gestures with his other hand)?
      Joey: (smiles and winks lasciviously) Put your hands together.

    • Monica: I've got a new plan now. Babies!
      Chandler: Well, you're gonna need much bigger jars.

    • Chandler: (in bed with Janice, thinking) Look at all that room on her side! You could fit a giant penguin over there. That would be weird though. Okay, hug and roll time! I'm huggin', I'm huggin', you're rollin', and... yes! Freedom! Except for this arm! Arm stuck! Stuck arm! Okay, time for the old table cloth trick. One fluid motion. Quick like a cat, quick like a cat! And one... two... three! (dumps Janice on the floor)

    • Monica: (looking at potential sperm donors) Okay. Alright, how's this? Twenty-seven, Italian-American guy... He's an actor, born in Queens... Wow! Big family. Seven sisters... and he's the only... (looks at Joey) ...boy. (looks back at the form) Oh, my God, under Personal Comments, "New York Knicks rule!"
      Joey: Yeah, the Knicks rule!

    • Phoebe: (about Malcolm stalking Ursula) You think he's still following her?
      Chandler: Pheebs... Wake up and smell the restraining order!

    • Monica: (about Ursula's stalker) I think that if you really like this guy, you should just trust him.
      Phoebe: Thank you, Monica.
      Joey: Or-r-r, you could follow him and see where he goes.
      Monica: Oh, that's what I would do--forget mine!

    • Phoebe: (Phoebe catches Malcolm following Ursula) Oh, well, whaddaya know? There goes my identical twin sister! Just walking along, looking like me!

    • Joey: (looking at Monica's donor form) Wow! This guy's an astronaut? That would have been cool! (seeing Monica look at him sadly) ...for like a day.

  • Notes

  • Allusions

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