Jesse enters his twins in a contest against Rebecca's cousin's daughters.
Daniel Ernest "Danny" Tanner
Joseph Alvin "Joey" Gladstone
Rebecca Donaldson-Katsopolis (recurring Season 2, 1989-1995)
Donna Jo Margaret "D.J." Tanner
Stephanie Judith Tanner
Debbie & Darla Donaldson
When everyone was at the contest, Joey said to Michelle, "Hey, there's your cousins" (Darla and Debbie). But the fact is, they aren't Michelle's cousins in any way. Darla and Debbie father is Rebecca's cousin, so the girls are the daughters of her cousin, which does not involve Michelle at all. If anything, the twin girls are Nicky and Alex's second cousins on their mother's side.
"Darla: The Majesty of America.
Debbie: The Beauty of the sea.
Darla: The Seven wonders of the world are
Debbie: not as cute as we.
That doesn't make any sense! Debbie and Darla (whether separate or put together) can't be as cute as the majesty of America, the beauty of the sea, or any of the 7 wonders of the world (whether separate or put together)! No wonder those two lost!
Rebecca: Honey, listen. I have somethin' to tell you, but you have to promise not to whine.
Jesse: I never whine.
Rebecca: My cousin Dick and his wife Donna are in from Nebraska.
Jesse: Oh, those rich snobs?!
Rebecca: You're whining.
Jesse: No, I'm not. I'm just voicing a manly complaint.
Rebecca: They brought their twins Debbie and Darla for the contest at the expo. And we're having dinner with them tonight.
Jesse: Aw, jeez, I hafta eat with 'em, too?! All right, that was a whine. That was a whine. Yeah.
Michelle: So, what do you guys wanna do?
Debbie: Do you have a TV? A VCR? A laser disc player?
Michelle: I have Mr. Potato Head.
Darla and Debbie: Boring!
Donna: Who's this little girl?
Rebecca: Oh, this is Danny's daughter Michelle. Michelle, say hi to Dick, Donna, Debbie, and Darla.
Michelle: Hi, Dick and...all you other 'D' people.
Michelle: (watches the Donaldson twins play with their video game consoles) When can I have a turn?
Debbie: When you buy one.
Michelle: Boy, is this gonna be a fun night.
Joey: Oh, Donna, I hope you don't mind. I made the girls some ice cream sundaes.
Donna: Oh, not at all. Girls, what do you say?
Darla: They would've been better with hot fudge.
Joey: Oh, you're very welcome. Always a pleasure.
Joey: Oh boy, girls, you do love fresh baked cookies, don't you?
Debbie: We prefer store-bought.
Jesse: Man, that was good eatin. I'm so full, I'm sweatin' butta!
Dick: I hope you didn't stain your best T-shirt.
Jesse: Hey, Dick. Let's lay the cards out on the table pal. You don't like me, do you?
Dick: Well, I'd like you as an acquaintance. I'd like you as a waiter. I'd even like you as a mechanic, but as a cousin, well, let's just say we always imagined Rebecca with someone... better.
Jesse: Let me tell you somethin'. I'm not your acquaintance. And I'm not your waiter. And if I were your mechanic, you'd be having brake problems. Small joke.
Dick: Well, I guess we know where we stand.
Jesse: Yes. I guess we know.
Dick: See ya at the expo. Oh, and smart move not entering the twins contest. I mean, why put your kids through that kinda rejection?
Jesse: Rejection? All right, now you've pushed me too far. Y'know what? I'm gonna enter my twins in that contest, and they're gonna make you wish you never left Nebraska, pal.
Dick: (laughs nervously) Looks like somebody had their lobster bib on a little too tight. Huh? (laughs seriously) Small joke.
(he heads out the door)
Jesse: Now, here's a big joke for ya. I don't even like lobster!
(he slams the door)
Dick: Small joke.
Jesse: Yeah, well, you know what they said: Small joke, small mind.
Donna: We know you're a struggling musician.
Rebecca: Oh no, no, Jesse has been very successful. And do you know he had a #1 record in Japan?
Dick: Well, if we ever have dinner in Japan, it will be your treat.
Michelle: Nicky and Alex were so adorable.
Joey: You must be pretty darn proud. Huh, Bec?
Rebecca: Oh, yeah. Having twin Elvis impersonators. Every mother's dream.
Jesse: I just wanted to prove to them that even though I can't buy you a a big house or a new car every year that we have really great kids.
Rebecca: What are you talking about?
Jesse: Becky, if you had a choice all over again would you have married Doyce Plunk?
Rebecca: Rebecca Plunk?
First (and only) appearance of the snobby Donaldson family: Dick (Rebecca's younger cousin, and the snobbiest), Donna (Dick's wife), and Darla and Debbie (Dick's twin daughters).
The backround music played when the twins walk out on stage is the same music played when Jesse (John Stamos) walks out on stage in Mad Money as Elvis.
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