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Philip J. Fry / Prof. Hubert J. Farnsworth / Dr. Zoidberg / Zapp Brannigan / Small Glurmo #1
Glab / Amazonian
Kif Kroker / Neutral President / The Hyperchicken
Amy and Zoidberg do not appear in this episode.
The way DOOP is written on the flags makes it a rotational ambigram.
Among the familiar members of D.O.O.P. are Grand Councilwoman Glab, a Horrible Gelatinous Blob, the Robot Elders, a Decapodian, an Amazonian, a Neptunian, a Trisolian, some Wormulons, the Yarn People of Nylar IV, an Insectoid, and a Space Lizard.
Opening theme promotion: NOT Y3K COMPLIANT
The White Flag of War is actually a surrender flag. (In any war, when a white flag is flown, it means that side has surrendered.)
The oversized scissors are left-handed.
LOOK HARD: While Zapp and Kif peer into a restaurant, you can see a cop on the street writing parking tickets.
You can see Hermes' office from the Planet Express lobby.
On the jury at Zapp Brannigan's trial are: one half of Glurmo from "Fry & The Slurm Factory", a Neptunian, an Insectoid, a Robot Elder from "Fear of a Bot Planet", and Fry's Trisolian advisor Gorgak from "My Three Suns".
DOOP stands for Democratic Order of Planets.
The leader of DOOP is named Glab.
Despite Zapp's unhealthy obsession with Leela, he is suddenly willing to let her die in the ship with everyone else. Then again given his incompetence and the enormous stupidity of his plan (Killing a bunch of innocents was supposed to regain his commission how?) it's not at all a stretch to say that Leela was yet another "detail" he overlooked.
Furthermore, it could be said that his irrational and seething hatred of the Neutrals and his earlier association of her as one of them could take precedence over his infatuation with Leela.
If Leela couldn't get control of the ship, how did they manage to steer it back to Earth?
How did Zapp get the spacesuit on Kif so fast without lifting his feet off the ground?
The White Flag of War flutters in the vacuum of space.
The hose Fry is holding disappears right when Bender throws the sponge.
Zapp shot a lazer through the dome of the new DOOP headquarters without decompressing it.
After Zapp points to the yarn people of Nylar 4, the statue behind him disappears briefly.
The drawing of Leela on the ship doesn't appear until Bender and Fry point it out to Leela.
Hermes uses Star Trek to explain to Fry what the DOOP is, but as we learn in a later episode, it is illegal to mention Star Trek.
Bender: Don't worry Leela, one day we'll be able to look back on this and laugh. (Walks towards the door and laughs)
Fry: Leela, I just want you to know that even though you're mean, you're the best captain ever.
Bender: Yeah, you're one dynamite lady. Can we have a week off?
Bender: Come on, Captain.
Leela: Oh, alright.
Farnsworth: No time off.
Fry: Aw, man.
Leela: Let's mutiny!
Glab: Zapp Brannigan, I hereby restore your rank and parking privileges.
Zapp: And so, when Captain Leela panicked, perhaps distracted by female troubles, my quick thinking allowed me to do whatever I did to save the day.
Glab: Captain Leela, is this rambling story of magic and heroism true?
Leela: Well, actually-
Farnsworth: That a girl! If they don't take him back we can keep him as captain.
Leela: Your Honour, it's all true: My female incompetence, Zapp's cat-like reflexes, the stuff that made no sense, all of it.
Leela: Hurry! I don't wanna die at the age of 25.
Bender: Honey, unless we hit a time warp, I wouldn't worry about it.
Leela: Then go get the hover-dolly you didn't break and load all the dark matter into the left engine.
Bender: Oh, man, that crap's heavy.
Fry: And warm.
Leela: OK, OK. We have one chance. Are you willing to do what I say as captain?
Leela: Even if I make you work hard?
Bender: As your God is my witness.
Fry: Leela, we want you to be captain again.
Leela: Let me guess. He cancelled naptime? (They shake their heads) He ran out of beer? (They shake their heads again) So he's about to kill us? (they nod "yes")
Bender: What now, chief?
Zapp: Now we crash the ship into their headquarters, killing them in a hellish firestorm from which no living thing can escape.
Fry: Good, good, then what?
Zapp: Then your mission is complete. I, meanwhile, will have ejected to safety, wearing the only spacesuit on board.
Fry: Wait a second. Is this plan gonna kill us?
Zapp: Of course. What do you think I meant by "loyalty"?
Zapp: This is Zapp Brannigan of the good ship... Planet Express Ship. I come swinging the olive branch of peace.
Neutral President's Aide: Should we trust him, Your Neutralness?
Neutral President: All I know is my gut says maybe.
Zapp: Now, in the name of all that is good and honourable, we'll call the Neutral President with a message of peace, then blast him.
Bender: Yes, sir, sirdy-sir-sir-sir!
Zapp: Fly the white flag of war.
Zapp: Prepare to continue the epic struggle between good and neutral.
Zapp: Meanwhile, I have a plan. We will single-handedly attack our archenemy the Neutral Planet.
Kif: Oh, jeez.
Zapp: Once the neutral war machine lies in ruins, I'll be a hero again and the DOOP will reinstate me as captain.
Kif: But, sir, that plan makes no sense.
Zapp: Maybe not to you, Kif, but if I recall correctly, you were court-martialled in disgrace.
Fry: Ooh, burn!
Bender: Nailed you, buddy!
Zapp: So, do I have your loyalty, men?
Bender: To the ends of the universe.
Fry: Ten hundred percent!
Zapp: That's not nearly loyal enough. I order you to sit around and drink beer until you're as loyal as Kif here.
Bender: Yes, sir, sir!
Kif: Um, may I have a beer, sir?
Zapp: No. You're loyal enough already.
Kif: What shall I do with your civilian clothes, sir?
Zapp: Take them to the laundry-brig.
Leela: You really don't want me to be captain anymore?
Bender: You got it, genius.
Leela: But, didn't I do a good job?
Fry: You were mean and you yelled and you made us do all that work.
Leela: Sometimes a captain needs to do those things. Besides I, I thought we were friends.
Fry: Yeah, well, you shouldn't have been such a mean captain then.
Zapp: Throw her in the brig.
Fry: We don't have a brig.
Zapp: Then throw her in the laundry room, which will hereafter be referred to as "the brig".
Zapp: Y'know, boys, a good captain needs many skills, such as boldness, daring and a velour uniform. And I'm not convinced Leela has any of those things.
Fry: Ah, Leela's not that bad. I just wish she didn't make us work so much.
Zapp: Back when I was captain all I asked from my men was their complete loyalty. If I had that, then for all I cared they could sit around the whole day drinking beer in their underpants.
Bender: This is all Leela's fault.
Fry: Yeah. If she had let us use the back-up dolly, we could have broken it, given up and gone home by now.
Kif: The point is, it's just so humiliating working for that man. Once, he actually ordered me to... shave his armpits while he was in the bathtub. So, I said-
Leela: Y'know, why don't we talk about something besides Zapp for a while?
Kif: Oh, alright. Um... well... how 'bout then, um... OK, well, there he was in the tub, right?
Bender: I'm Leela, get to work, neh, neh, neh.
Fry: I agree.
Zapp: Let me ask you a serious question, Leela: Does the company that made your bra make a girdle as well?
Leela: What the hell happened?
Bender: Some breaking occurred, the dolly was involved, that's about all we know.
Leela: I told you dumb apes not to overload it. Each of those pillows weighs 150lbs here.
Fry: Alright, don't get your panties in a knot. We'll just use the back-up dolly.
Bender: I'll start loading up the pillows.
Leela: I don't want any screw-ups. Use the hover-dolly and just deliver one pillow at a time.
Bender: Hey, here's an idea, let's deliver all the pillows at once.
Zapp: That's using the old noodle!
Leela: OK, crew, listen up. Your job is to delivery these 40 pillows to that hotel.
Bender: They're not very heavy but you don't hear me not complaining.
Leela: They're not heavy in here because we have an anti-grav pump. But once you get out on the surface the gravity will be very intense.
Fry: Hey, no prob', this lead apron'll protect me.
Kif: I've computed out landing co-ordinates, Captain.
Leela: Thanks, Kif. Very nice work.
Kif: Wait, what?
Leela: I said "very nice work".
Kif: This is the happiest day of my life.
Zapp: Here's to us poor schmoes working for the man. Even if he is a hot, sexy, female man.
Zapp: So, this Leela. I know she's a very sensuous woman but what manner of captain is she?
Fry: She's really strict.
Bender: And mean.
Zapp: I see. Does she by any chance give the crewmembers spankings?
Fry: No, she just makes us do work and stuff.
Zapp: Good, good. But should she ever institute some sort of bare-bottom spanking policy, let me go in your place. I won't have my comrades harmed.
Bender: Hey, this guy's alright!
Farnsworth: I'd like everyone to meet our new employees. Which ones are new?
Hermes: The green dude and the fat man.
Farnsworth: Hmm, I could swear I've never seen that robot before either.
Bender: I'm Bender. You know? The lovable rascal.
Farnsworth: Oh, yes, yes. My good friend, of course. Anyway, whoever you all are, I have good news. You'll be making a delivery to Stumbos 4, a planet with such high gravity you'll most likely be crushed under the weight of your own hair. Enjoy!
Farnsworth: Leela, who are you talking to?
Zapp: Just a broken-down hobo who's hit rock-bottom. And his commanding officer.
Farnsworth: Why, you're that disgraced starship captain. Having him on staff will distract people from our horrendous safety record. Come in.
Zapp: One day a man has everything, the next day he blows up a $400 billion space station and the next day he has nothing. It makes you think.
Kif: No, it doesn't.
Glab: Zapp Brannigan, you are hereby stripped of your rank as captain and dismissed from the DOOP.
Zapp: I'd like to make one final statement. Kif, c'mere and hold up the flag... And wave it a little, for God's sakes. My friends, you can take away a man's title and his uniform but you can never take away his integrity or his honour. Plus it was mostly Kif's fault.
Glab: Kif Kroker, you are also stripped of your rank and dishonourably discharged.
Zapp: I'd like to cross-examine the witness.
Glab: I'm going to allow this.
Zapp: We've met before have we not?
Zapp: And on that occasion, did you have sex with someone? May I remind you you are still under oath.
Zapp: Please point out the person in this courtroom you had sex with. (Leela points to Zapp) And his name is?
Leela: Zapp Brannigan.
Zapp: The very same Zapp Brannigan who did not blow up DOOP headquarters. I rest my case.
Glab: The evidence against Zapp Brannigan is strong. However, in light of his years of service, and the incompetence of this hillbilly prosecutor, I'm afraid I must dismiss all charges.
Leela: Dismiss all charges? Your Honour, I know the case is closed and you've rendered your verdict, but I wanna testify.
Glab: I'm going to allow this.
Hyper-Chicken: Now, Miss Leela, on the date in question, were you or were you not wearing a hoop skirt?
Leela: That's a stupid question. What matters is Zapp Brannigan is the sorriest captain I've ever seen, and I saw the idiot blow up DOOP headquarters with my own eye.
Glab: Zapp Brannigan, you stand accused of blowing up DOOP headquarters. How do you plead?
Zapp: Absolutely 99% not guilty.
Glab: And now, to cut the ribbon, the legendary DOOP captain who just returned from a triumphant carpet-bombing of Eden 7, Zapp Brannigan.
Zapp: What makes a man turn neutral? Lust for gold? Power? Or were you just born with a heart full of neutrality?
Kif: Um, sir, you're supposed to be cutting the ribbon right now.
Zapp: No matter. I'll simply cut it from here with the ships laser.
Kif: Sir, I don't think that's wise.
Zapp: Kif, if there's one thing I don't need it's your I-don't-think-that's-wise attitude.
Leela: If you don't mind, we're here to deliver the scissors for the ribbon-cutting.
Zapp: Then you're under arrest.
Leela: What for?
Zapp: How do I know these scissors aren't part of some Neutral plot?
Leela: But they're not even sharp. Who could I possibly hurt with them?
Zapp: The Yarn People of Nylar 4? So, a plan to assassinate a weird-looking alien with scissors. How very Neutral of you.
Zapp: Why, Leela, I do believe we've met.
Bender: He means you guys did it.
Zapp: I hate these filthy Neutrals, Kif. With enemies you know where they stand but with Neutrals, who knows? It sickens me.
Glab: I can think of no better place for this centre of diplomacy than here in orbit around the Neutral Planet. What are your thoughts on this momentous occasion, Your Neutralness?
Neutral President: I have no strong feelings one way or the other.
Fry: So, what's it like on planet Amazonia?
Amazonian: Big rats there. Me crush with club.
Fry: That's so interesting. Maybe we could get to know each other over a coffee.
Fry: Wow! There's a million aliens. I've never seen anything so mind-blowing. Ooh, a reception table with muffins!
Farnsworth: Tonight is the ribbon-cutting for the DOOP's new headquarters.
Leela: What are we delivering?
Farnsworth: Something without which no ribbon-cutting ceremony could proceed. The ceremonial oversized scissors.
Leela: What's the mission?
Farnsworth: It's a delivery for the Democratic Order Of Planets.
Fry: DOOP? What's that?
Farnsworth: It's similar to the United Nations from your time, Fry.
Hermes: Or like the Federation from your Star Trek programme.
Farnsworth: Good news, everyone. We have a mission to further the noble cause of intergalactic peace.
Bender: Nope. Watching cartoons.
Zapp: This is a mutiny! (Zapp handcuffs Leela) You're a capable doer of the nasty... but I'm taking over.
Leela: On what grounds, you oaf?
Zapp: Failure to prevent a mutiny.
Leela: (about the oversized scissors) We'll get them there as fast as we can.
Farnsworth: Well, okay, but don't run with them.
Zapp: Rock crushes scissors! But paper covers rock. And scissors cuts paper! Kif, we have a conundrum.
Zapp: Search them for paper! And ... bring me a rock!
Leela: Oh no! He's disabled the steering! We're gonna crash!
Bender: Leela, save me! And yourself, I guess. And my banjo! (looks around) And Fry!
Leela: Alright ... This is the third hose-fight that's broken up today. And the second one using actual hoses!
Zapp: Leela! I didn't know where else to turn. You are the only woman who ever loved me.
Leela: I never loved you.
Zapp: I mean physically.
Neutral Official: Your neutralness, it's a beige alert.
Neutral Leader: If I don't survive, tell my wife: Hello.
Zapp Brannigan: Just let me work for a little food. Perhaps I could paint a fence, or service you sexually, or mop the floors.
Leela: You don't know how to do any of those things.
Zapp Brannigan: Kif might!
This episode marks the first appearence of the Hyper Chicken Lawyer.
The slogan of the Neutral Planet on City Hall was "Live Free Or Don't." New Hampshire's state motto is "Live Free Or Die."
The Doop Headquarters is in the 'Neutral Zone', which is a reference to 'Star Trek' which explained there was a Neutral Zone between the territory of the Federation and the Romulan Empire.
Star Trek: Shatner Reference
A very nice spoof of Star Trek's worst kept secret - William Shatner wore a girdle during parts of the series. Also you do have to wonder how Kirk would have dealt with neutral people.
Heavy Planet: by Hal Clement
The book about a mission to a planet with exceedingly high gravity, and all of the challenges that entail are parodied in the episode. It was republished in 1954 as "Mission of Gravity."
The chess-like game Fry and Bender are playing is just like the one in Star Wars with the 3D pieces.
After Zap Brannigan and Kif are stripped of their ranks and dismissed from DOOP, a montage spoofs the 1969 film "Midnight Cowboy", depicting Zap (in a cowboy outfit) hustling Kif on the streets of New New York. The montage even features the same song,"Everybody's Talkin'" from Midnight Cowboy.
Title: Brannigan Begin Again
Title refers to "Finnegan begin again", a leitmotif in James Joyce's classic syllable-twister.
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