Comedy Central (ended 2013)
This one has been said twice
-"Compare your lives to mine and then kill yourselves!"
-"I'm so embarassed, I wish everyone else was dead"
And here are a few I'm surprised haven't been said
-"I never mean to hurt anyone.. or help anyone"
-"Oooh hoo hoo, here comes violence!"
Save my friends! And Zoidberg!
Not exacly a Bender quote but...
Mayor Poopenmegyer (or whatever) greets Fry, Leela, and Bender as Captain Yesterday, Clobberella, and My Leige
Again, not exacly a quote but...
Robot Devil: I'll help you... if you give me your first born son! HAHAHAHAH!!!!!11
(Cuts to Bender in a suburban area facing a child that looks like him)
Child: Papa? I knew you'd come back Papa!
(Bender scoops child up and comes back to the Robot Devil's office)
Bender: Hear you go, chief.
"OH, WHO WILL MAKE BENDER WAFFLES JUST THE WAY HE LIKES THEM NOW?!"
"Have you ever tried simply turning off the TV? Sitting down with your children? And hitting them?"
"All those times I'd say 'kill all humans', I'd always whisper 'except one'. Fry was that one, and I never told him so!"
"I never meant to hurt anyone... or help anyone..."
"The only reason you get all the guys is because you dress like a tramp! [slaps Fry]"
"Je suis Napoleon! ...Haha, no, seriously, I'm not."
"No, wait, I think I'm coming down with Stolkholmes syndrome! ...handsome."
"Oh, how I wish I could believe or understand that."
"Bender is a lone wolf, a solitary eagle, a cuddly baby tapir, and that's why I love em'!"
"Did you rip off your own arm as a joke?"
"This could be the end of the banana daiquiri as we know it. ...Also life."
"Oh! I'm gonna wash my linin so hard!"
Opera!Bender: Leela! Leela! Leela! Save him! Save Fry, Save Fry! Godzilla will devour him! As for me I must be off to see a doc about this cough! ...Goodbye!
Bender: I don't recall fighting Godzilla, but that is so what I would have done.
"I wish I was stupid and violent. I'd pound their -"
"I could curl up at da foo'da the bed."
"[drunkenly] I once knew a guy. You look like him. He wasn't, neither. Brrrrg. I'm a good captain."
Okay... so maybe I got a little carried away. But can I help it if Bender has some great quotes? No. No, I can't. The last two I really like more for the way they were said, though.
|Bender: "Have you ever Just tried turning off the TV, sitting down with your kids, and hitting them?" (Sorry if some words are wrong, I havn't seen that episode in a long time)|
Isn't that from Bender Should Not Be Allowed on TV?
Fry: I can't believe they kicked me out. I must have been really acting like a jerk.
Bender: Yeah, but everybody's a jerk. You, me, (points to guy) this jerk. That's my philosophy.
"If they put me on a stamp, tell 'em to use the young Bender."
"Whenever I said 'kill all humans', I'd always whisper, 'except one'. Fry was that one, and I never got to tell him!"
"Who will make Bender waffles just the way he likes them now?!"
"You degenerate hussy! I'm very disappointed in you, too, Anglelyne."
"This is the worst kind of discrimination...the kind against me!"
//Bender: Banditos aye, that's great, 'cause I have a flawless spanish accent. "I say Addeose Paddree, I'll meet in Tihuahuah, we shall eat "Jewockamole" by El Rio."
Calculon: That was so horrible, I think it gave me cancer. I don't care how good they say you are, you'll never work on my show.
Fry and Leela from behind the door: Yeah Bender! We demand Bender!
Calculon: However, you got the job. Put er there son.
Bender: Fathero! (Bender Should Not Be Allowed On TV!)
//Fry: I only have 2 more fantasies to do, be invisible in a chocolate factory and to be hooked up with a big time celebrity.
Bender: I could hit ya over the head until you think that's what happened. (I Dated A Robot)
//Bender: And I could use real words. Not fake ones like "Odelay"
Beck: Odelay is a real word, just check the bectionary.
Bender: Oooh. (Bendin' in the Wind)
//Uncle Vlademere: Join us Bender, you'll like being dead.
Bender: That's what they said about being alive! (The Honking)
//Slave: Pharoah Bender, it hurts to breath.
Bender: Then what do you think you should stop doing? (A Pharaoh to Remember)
From Bender's Big Score:
"You're wrong! Fry is dead! I killed him!
Amy: Bender, why?
Personally, I blame you!
Amy: But how can you?
Well, it ain't easy, but that just proves how great I am.
Not 100% accurate, but that's the gist of it. Just to be sure, the unmarked quotes are Bender's