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Thursday 10:00 PM on Comedy Central

Professor Hubert Farnsworth Quotes.

  • Avatar of CFlovesLF

    CFlovesLF

    [1]Apr 11, 2007
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    Farnsworth is hillarious. Leave your quotes here.

    "Nibler has gone somewhere I one day hope to go... the toilet."

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  • Avatar of lazyjay

    lazyjay

    [2]Apr 11, 2007
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    "Very well. If cop a feel I must, then cop a feel I shall!"
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    buffyTVSrox

    [3]Apr 12, 2007
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    "With my last breath, I curse Zoidberg!"
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    mitu123

    [4]Apr 12, 2007
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    "Please, old friend, don't jump. Use another method that won't damage your liver. Other people need it, you know."
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  • Avatar of seanlyger

    seanlyger

    [5]Apr 12, 2007
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    "Now, now. Perfectly symetrical violence never solved anything."

    "Think, you disco duck, think."

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  • Avatar of simpsons26

    simpsons26

    [6]Apr 13, 2007
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    Good news everone

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  • Avatar of DojoKanooJoto

    DojoKanooJoto

    [7]Apr 13, 2007
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    "When you kill someone remember to heart their heart to gain their courage *licks lips*.
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  • Avatar of jimbo_001

    jimbo_001

    [8]Apr 14, 2007
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    Farnsworth is my second favourite character (after Bender and tied with Fry, followed by Zoidberg and Zapp) and nearly every line the senile old man says is a crack up ( in fact, I also made this thread - Good News Everyone - but it was over a year ago).

    There are way too many cla$$ic lines to list so here are a couple of my favourites:

    Farnsworth: We'll need to speed up their growth with time particles called Chronitons.
    Bender: Aren't those the particles that destroyed an entire civilisa-
    Farnsworth: Good news, everyone! You're off to the Tempus Nebula to gather Chronitons.

    Farnsworth: Start the ship, Leela. Let's just steal the damn radar dish and get back to our own time.
    Fry: But- But won't that change history?
    Farnsworth: Oh, a lesson in not changing history from Mr. I'm-My-Own-Grandpa! Let's get the hell out of here already! Screw history!

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  • Avatar of ElmisOriginal

    ElmisOriginal

    [9]Apr 14, 2007
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    "I thought of it in a dream, then forgot it in another dream."
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  • Avatar of lazyjay

    lazyjay

    [10]Apr 14, 2007
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    jimbo_001 wrote:
    Farnsworth: Start the ship, Leela. Let's just steal the damn radar dish and get back to our own time.
    Fry: But- But won't that change history?
    Farnsworth: Oh, a lesson in not changing history from Mr. I'm-My-Own-Grandpa! Let's get the hell out of here already! Screw history!

    That made me think of another of my favourites from slightly later in that episode.

    Farnsworth: Choke on that causality!

    What a fantastic take on the whole SF time travel concept.

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  • Avatar of simpsons26

    simpsons26

    [11]Apr 14, 2007
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    I expect you'll want to see my angry crotchety grandpa discount card!

    Edited on 04/29/2007 9:12am
    Edited 2 total times.
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  • Avatar of cento8485

    cento8485

    [12]Apr 16, 2007
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    Bad news, nobody. The super collider super-exploded. I need you to take it back and exchange it for a wobbly CD rack and some of those rancid meatballs.

    Well then good news! It's a suppository.

    Buddha! Zeus! God! One of you guys do something! Help! Satan! You owe me!

    Amongst many others

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  • Avatar of ajjo

    ajjo

    [13]Apr 16, 2007
    • member since: 04/11/07
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    Oh blithery poop, my cowardly lobster. You don't need courage. After all, who needs courage when you have a gun?

    Oh, now I'll need a fake ID to buy ultra porn.

    If anyone needs me I'll be in the Angry Dome.

    Sweet zombie Jesus!

    Edited on 04/16/2007 7:38am
    Edited 4 total times.
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  • Avatar of Emzzzz

    Emzzzz

    [14]Apr 16, 2007
    • member since: 04/17/07
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    I don't have time for this, I need to buy a single piece of fruit with a coupon and then return it making people wait behind me while i complain.
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  • Avatar of rockyoursocks

    rockyoursocks

    [15]Apr 17, 2007
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    Fransworth: (After taking his coat off in the cold) Brisk!

     Fransworth: That's not what happened! Shut up and go live with your parents!

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  • Avatar of simpsons26

    simpsons26

    [16]Apr 17, 2007
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    Say wha.

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  • Avatar of nuclearbandito

    nuclearbandito

    [17]Apr 17, 2007
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    "Good news everyone! The university's bringing me up on disciplinary charges! Wait a minute, that's not good news at all!"
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  • Avatar of simpsons26

    simpsons26

    [18]Apr 17, 2007
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    nuclearbandito wrote:
    "Good news everyone! The university's bringing me up on disciplinary charges! Wait a minute, that's not good news at all!"

    What episode is that from.

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  • Avatar of jimbo_001

    jimbo_001

    [19]Apr 17, 2007
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    More classic senility:

    Farnsworth: It's a sunny little doomed planet, inhabited by a number of frisky little doomed animals.
    Leela: Animals?
    Farnsworth: That's right. Animals in desperate need of rescue. You see, Vergon 6 was once filled with a super-dense substance known as dark matter, each pound of which weighs over ten thousand pounds.
    Leela: Wait! What about the animals?
    Farnsworth: Well, dark matter is extremely valuable as starship fuel. That's why it was all mined out, leaving the planet completely hollow.
    Leela: Yes, but what about the animals?
    Farnsworth: The wha'?
    Leela: The animals.
    Farnsworth: I didn't say anything about animals. Now it seems that the planet will collapse within three days. Incidentally, this will kill all the animals.

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  • Avatar of ssimonds1

    ssimonds1

    [20]Apr 18, 2007
    • member since: 04/10/07
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    Sweet Zombie Jesus
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