Decapodian Emperor / Decapodian Man
Philip J. Fry / Professor Hubert Farnsworth / Dr. Zoidberg / Fat Man
Amy Wong / Decapodian Woman #2
Edna / Decapodian Woman #1 / Decapodian Woman #3
Hermes Conrad / Nautilus
Opening theme promotion: FROM THE NETWORK THAT BROUGHT YOU "THE SIMPSONS"
While the gang walks through the gym, a lady is working out on a machine called a 'kegelcizer' and a huge stack of weights is going up and down.
Most of Zoidberg's people talk with New York/Yiddish accents.
Edna's doorbell sounds like a sonar pulse.
Zoidberg has elastic restraints on his claws, just like a lobster before it's cooked.
Lobsters don't grow unless they molt, and males molt more often than females. This, rather than internal parasites, is what would keep Edna thin. Also, shortly after molting is the time when the females usually mate.
During the fight to the death between Fry and Zoidberg, Zoidberg carves a letter 'Z' in Fry's shirt, and later in the scene, his shirt is normal.
Zoidberg can play basketball quite well in this episode, but back in 1ACV12 When Aliens Attack his claws kept puncturing the volleyballs when he played on the beach.
Fry: No biggie.
Zoidberg: Yes biggie. I learned to feel things I'd never felt before: Love, jealousy, passion for disembowelling. I owe it all to you.
Zoidberg: Well it was nice of you to let me reattach your arm, Fry, especially after I made a complete eel out of myself.
Fry: My fellow fish monsters, far be it for me to question your stupid civilization or its dumb customs, but is squeezing each other's brains out with a giant nutcracker really going to solve anything?
Bender: Fry, I've never asked you for anything before but, if it's not too much trouble, when it comes to the ninth round just let him win.
Fry: But it's a fight to the death!
Bender: Oh, so this is suddenly all about you. Sheesh!
Zoidberg: I choose my own claws! I want the tactile pleasure of chopping him right here in the gonads!
He points at Fry's neck
Fry: Shh! Nobody correct him!
Decapodian Emperor: Fry, having guessed what animal I was thinking of, you shall have first choice of weapon.
Decapodian Emperor: Edna, have you anything to say before begins the Claw-Plach?
Edna: I do. I just want to say that today I got up and I had a piece of toast. Then I brushed my teeth-
Fry: Shut up!
Edna: I love you Fry!
Zoidberg: Fry, it's been years since medical school so remind me. Disembowelling in your species: Fatal or non-fatal?
Zoidberg: Large bet on myself in round one!
Decapodian Emperor: Listen, lady, as you can plainly see I'm a highly desirable male, groaning with jelly. Yet I embrace a life of celibacy in order to uphold our crazy traditions. One of your friends must die.
Bender: Fate is cruel and unyielding and what must be must be. Takin' all bets! I'm giving 9-2 on Zoidberg, the crab with the jab! The Great Red Hope!
Zoidberg: Get ready, Fry. I'm going to rip your swim bladder out and show it to you.
Leela: Dr. Zoidberg, this is madness. You're being irrational.
Zoidberg: Of course I'm being irrational! I'm in love!
Decapodian Emperor: The law is clear. Fry and Zoidberg shall fight to the death for the claw of the beautiful Edna.
Fry: But I don't want her!
Decapodian Emperor: Once invoked, the sacred tradition of Claw-Plach can not be taken back. It is a recent tradition, only 18 years old, but it is a tradition none the less.
Edna: Oh, it's true, Zoidberg. We can't hide it any longer. Fry and I have fallen in love and we're going to mate tomorrow.
Fry: Dr. Zoidberg, it's not how it looks.
Zoidberg: Her caviar is on your neck!
Edna: Teach me to love you, squishy poet from beyond the stars!
Fry: Uh, I'm flattered, really. If I was gonna do it with a big, freaky mud bug you'd be way up the list!
Fry: No thanks. I just came to tell you that Zoidberg's really great. He's got male jelly coming out the wazoo.
Edna: Well that is where it comes out...
Edna: Fry? You mean words of such beauty came from the blowhole of that hideous alien?
Leela: Yeah... what? Look, never mind the words. Zoidberg's a doctor. A doctor, honey.
Leela: Zoidberg said some dumb stuff but he's a nice guy, really. It's just that Fry's been telling him what to say and Fry's a... do you have idiots on your planet?
Edna: Yes, well... excuse me, I've got to powder my mouth flaps.
Leela: Uh, me too.
Zoidberg(reading): I'd like to propose a toast to coat check number 84.
Fry: Turn it over.
Zoidberg: Oh, Edna! (reading) Of all the slimy, gross crab monsters on this planet, you are apparently the hottest.
Bender: So I returned his artificial heart and ever since then I've been known by the name of Honest Bender.
Edna: You know, Zoidberg, it's crazy but when you talk this way your obvious deficiencies as a male seem... less obvious. Your genes seem less detrimental. You even stink more.
Zoidberg: Do I ask her to mate now?
Fry: Third date!
Fry: Now ask her how her day was.
Zoidberg: Why would I wanna know?
Fry: You wouldn't. Ask anyway.
Zoidberg: How was your day?
Edna: Well first I got up and had a piece of toast. Then I brushed my teeth. Then I went to the store to buy some fish. Then...
Zoidberg: Fry, look what you did, she won't shut up.
Fry: That's normal. Just nod your head and say "Uh-huh".
Edna: Dr. Zoidberg, your mating display failed. Why are you trying to talk to me?
Zoidberg: I have no idea.
Fry: You just wanna talk, it has nothing to do with mating.
Zoidberg: I just wanna talk, it has nothing to do with mating. Fry, that doesn't make sense.
Edna: Dr. Zoidberg, that doesn't make sense.
Zoidberg: It's all so complicated with the flowers and the romance and the lies upon lies.
Fry: OK, OK, don't worry. The love meister will take you under his wing.
Zoidberg: What? Now there's a bird involved?
Zoidberg: Hmm, this "love" intrigues me. Teach me to fake it.
Fry: Listen, Doc, if you wanna score you gotta fake like you're in love. Just look her in the eye, start crying and say "I've never been so happy."
Leela: If a guy ever did that to me I'd know it. Wait a second. They've all been doing that to me. Even Sean!
Zoidberg: No one will ever want to mate with me, not with a puny claw like this. Did you see those other guys? They looked like giant claws with bodies attached.
Leela: At least you didn't smell as bad as them.
Zoidberg: You're right, my stink gland is weak. Smell!
Edna: Oh, gee, yeah, I'm just going through a lot of things right now and... Look, Zoidberg, I carry more eggs than any other female and I owe it to our race to pick a mate who's stuffed with male jelly. Maybe a rock star.
Zoidberg: Or maybe a doctor?
Edna: I'm sorry, Zoidberg. You're just an inferior male specimen. Nice seeing you again.
Edna: Zoidberg? Well I didn't know you were back in town. I heard you went off and became a rich doctor.
Zoidberg: I've performed a few mercy killings.
Zoidberg: Edna? Edna, it's me, Zoidberg. Remember, from high school? You used to laugh at me because my face was covered with barnacles!
Leela: Why is Zoidberg the only one still alone?
Bender: 'Cause he's a loser, that's why. He's the lobster equivalent of Fry.
Decapodian Woman #1: Keep your jelly away from my eggs!
Decapodian Woman #2: So not interested.
Decapodian Woman #3: Humph. I've heard that line before!
Fry: Look how ridiculous they look.
Bender: Please, he's no different from the rest of you organisms; shooting DNA at each other make babies. I find it offensive.
Fry: I didn't come here to see any activity involving two guys. Where do you people do your erotic display?
Zoidberg: Same place as your species: The beach.
Bender: Look! Outdoor theatre! Let's get tickets. Oh, let's do!
Zoidberg: No, it's the ceremony of Claw-Plach, where my species fight to the death over matters of honour. Also whether abbreviations count in Scrabble. They don't!
Bender: You're looking less nuts, crabby.
Zoidberg: I'm feeling less nuts, thank you, because tomorrow I will be depositing my jelly in the cloacal vents of a female. If you catch my drift.
Farnsworth: Relax, my chiton-y chum. There's no problem. You're just heavy with male jelly.
Farnsworth: It must be mating season for Zoidberg's people; a chaotic time when his behaviour is dictated by the tiny brain in his rump.
Farnsworth: There's only one thing we can do-
Bender: I'll get the water boiling!
Zoidberg: Give it to me straight, Professor. Is it fin rot? It's fin rot, isn't it? Tell me it's not fin rot!
Bender: It's always so sad when a friend goes crazy and you have to have a big clam-bake and cook him! Yee-haw!
Fry: Maybe he has a parasite.
Hermes: Maybe he is a parasite!
Zoidberg: Amy, take off these rubber bands and I'll show you how normal I am!
Amy: Fool me seven times, shame on you. Fool me eight or more times, shame on me.
Leela: I wonder why Dr. Zoidberg is acting this way. Out of all of us he always seemed the most normal.
Zoidberg: Give me that. More weight!
Fry: Hey, Dr. Zoidberg, what's that jazz on your head?
Zoidberg: Enough with the questions. More weight! More! More!
Leela: Maybe you could do more reps with less weight.
Amy: Hey, who's up for a nice, hot steam?
Zoidberg: We crustaceans don't like steam.
Zoidberg: The gymnasium? Excellent, excellent. For some reason I'm frisky as a squid on Tuesday.
Fry: Mmm. Mmm! Now this is what I call a thousand years of progress: A Bavarian cream dog that's also self-microwaving!
Zoidberg: Well? How do I look?
Bender: Like whale barf.
Zoidberg: Then the illusion is complete!
Fry: (Whispering to Zoidberg from behind a bush) Tell her she looks thin!
Zoidberg: (shouting) You seem malnourished. Are you suffering from internal parasites?
Edna: Why, yes. Thanks for noticing.
Fry: OK, you're on a date. What's the first thing you do?
Zoidberg: Ask her to mate with me.
Fry: No. Tell her she's special.
Zoidberg: But she's not. She's merely the female with the largest clutch of eggs.
Fry: Well, tell her that. And then?
Zoidberg: Then mating.
Fry: No. Make up some feelings and tell her you have them. (Zoidberg raises his hand) Yes?
Zoidberg: Is "desire to mate" a feeling?
Fry: You're not even trying!
Singer: Call Robo-Rooter when you flush your towel.
Plumber-bot: And we can also help with an impacted bowel!
Fry: (While weight-lifting) Hey, Leela, look who's the super-stud!
Leela: Hmm, somebody must have turned down the gravity. I'll fix it for you.
(Leela returns the gravity to normal)
Fry: Co-ed steam rooms! I love the future!
Leela: Uh, Fry, you're in the women's steam room.
Fry: Ah, futuristic!
Amy: Hey, look what life was like before gene splicing.
Leela: Those poor, 20th century women.
Amy: And, Bender, your beer belly's so big your door won't even close. And that doesn't even make sense.
Bender: Hey, it looks like Zoidberg's finally coming out of his shell! Get it? Out of his shell! Out of his-ack!
(Zoidberg hits Bender)
Zoidberg: I am normal...ing
Leela: No offense, Fry, but you've become a fat sack of crap.
Farnsworth: We, by which I mean you, will have to rush him to his ancient homeworld, which will shortly erupt in an orgy of invertebrate sex.
Fry: Oh, baby. I'm there!
Leela: Fry, do you even understand the word invertebrate?
Fry: Nope, but that's not the word I'm interested in. No need to pack pants, people. Let's roll!
Leela: It's amazing that your people can fall in love so fast.
Zoidberg: Love? That word is unknown here. I'm simply looking for a female swollen with eggs to accept my genetic material.
Fry: You and me both, brother.
Zoidberg: I'm confused, Fry. I'm feeling a strange new emotion. Is it love when you care about a female for reasons beyond mating?
Fry: Nope. Must be some weird alien emotion.
Fry: So you have to choose a horrible death or a life without sex?
Fry: Hmm, tough call.
This episode won a Annie Award for Outstanding Individual Achievement for Directing in an Animated Television Production.
After Dr. Zoidberg severs Fry's right arm, it is actually a left arm for most of the remainder of the episode.
Fry's list of "first date" ingredients is exactly what Zapp Brannigan had on hand when he invited Leela to meet him in the Love-Nasium
The episode of All my Circuits Fry and Bender are watching in the beginning of the episode appears to be a repeat. It's from the episode I, Roommate where Calculon proposes to his girlfriend Monique.
The Great White Hope
Bender's name for Zoidberg, The Great Red Hope, is a reference to The Great White Hope a play (1967) and movie (1970) which tells a fictional idealised life story of boxing champion Arthur John Johnson, the first black world heavyweight boxing champion (1908-1915).
Cyrano de Bergerac:
The scene where Zoidberg woos Edna as she looks down from her balcony is similar to a scene from the play Cyrano de Bergerac.
A "Kegelcizer" is a machine invented by Dr. Arnold Kegel that is used to help women to overcome urinary incontinence.
Zoidberg's ancient homeworld is apparently named Decapod 10. Decapods are an order of (Earth's) crustaceans
The restaurant Fry, Leela, Edna, and Zoidberg go to is called "Red Primate", a reference to the "Red Lobster" chain of seafood restaurants.
Creature From The Black Lagoon
Aside from Zoidberg's fin, there are several references to the movie Creature From The Black Lagoon.
Zoidberg's goofy attempts to re-attach Fry's arm at the end is like Dr. Nick Riviera's and his patient "Mr. McGregg. With a leg for an arm, and an arm for a leg".
Title: Why Must I Be a Crustacean in Love
The episode's title is a reference to the title of the 1959 Dion and The Belmonts song, "Why Must I Be A Teenager In Love."
Zoidberg, like Zorro, makes a "Z" on Fry's chest (of course Zorro used a sword).
The plot of this episodes is pretty much a direct play on the classic Star Trek episode Amok Time (1967), in which Spock must return to his home planet Vulcan for a mating ritual, and Kirk must fight him as Fry does Dr. Zoidberg in this episode. In a great reference, the c, oft-used "fight music" from that episode is even used here, as the national anthem of Zoidberg's home planet! Also, the Lobster frenzy looks like the lake-like Great Link of the Founders, from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.
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