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ALL THE SPOILERS

Hi friends! I'm going to go ahead and assume that if you're reading this "Toni Watches", then you've read the ones for season onetwothreefour and five, and that you know the drill. Or, maybe you haven't. I don't know your life.

OKAY HERE IS THE DEAL - I waited to watch Game of Thrones for REASONS (don't give me that look!) I just caught up on seasons 4-7 all at once, and the only spoiler the internet maliciously ruined for me was that Kit Harington is still on the show.
When I watch the show, I send my rambling, wacko reactions to my bestie Liana. And now, for some reason unclear to any rational mind, I have compiled them here.

SHALL WE?? [Warning - there are a lot of swears]

                                                              SEASON 6

YAYYYYYY Sansa and Brienne and Podrick and Theon! What a dream team! Man, that was so satisfying. That whole scene. Theon trying to save her by himself... then Amazon and Podrick showing up and DESTROYING everyone.
And then the vows. happy sigh
Just go live in the woods, you guys! Just go be a content sitcom!

OMG! The Red Lady is a creepy old lady!
Like, suuuuuuuper creepy!
That's nuts!

Is Arya going to stay blind forever? That's sad.

Also - the whiny Spanish-but-not-Spanish lady killed the King of Spain. I was upset about that, but I suppose it wasn't a surprise.

"Next time I have an idea like that... punch me in the face."Hahahha... Tyrian and Varys need a buddy cop movie.
There are no weak links on Dany's team. Well. Maybe her boyfriend. I have no problems with him. I like him fine. But I don't LOVE him, you know? I love that actor. But not necessarily the character.

Anyway. Jon Snow just woke up.
I don't really understand WHY.
Like, he's a cool dude, and he saved a bunch of lives, and he was a good leader, even though his men didn't agree with him. So I get why people (within the story) would be real bummed that he died.
But... to go to all the trouble of getting a witch to resurrect him? Why, Davos? It feels like it happened only because he was a main character.
Don't get me wrong. I'm glad. I didn't want him to go. But still. I don't really buy it.
Also - you know what I'm thinking? What if this black witch magic that brings people back from the dead is what created the White Walkers in the first place?
Huh, guys? You thought of THAT, guys? Huh?
hahaha Jon was like, "I was murdered, and now I'm back. Why?" And Davos was all, *shrug* And Jon was like, "fair enough."
And I'm like, NOT fair enough, Jon Snow! That was the exact right question upon waking from the dead!
I'm glad he's himself and not some weirdo zombie thing. That's good news.
Hahahhaahha and now the Watch is all, "oh, Jon's back? Cool. I have zero follow-up questions. When do we eat?" Love this show.
OMG the hugging. This hugging is getting to me. #HereForTheHugs
The Wildling Captain hugged him, and then the Watch friend hugged him. This is great. I may watch that again. There is nothing more satisfying than men hugging each other in earnest.

I just don't give a whopping shit about Iron Islands politics. I just don't. I was SO SAD when Theon left the gang! I wanted them to travel the world together. See the sights. Try the food. Have adventures and sing songs.

And then he was all, "I don't deserve forgiveness", and Sansa was like, "you are literally the only person alive that I have good memories with." and he was all, "right, but 'member how I'm the worst?" and she was all, "well, yeah, but..." and he was like, "but?" and she was all, "I got nothing. Bye." and then THEY hugged.
So many hugs.
OH, and now Sansa knows that Arya is alive. So that's nice.

Aw shit. Jon Snow just dropped the mic. He hung the dicks who murdered him (ugh, Olly, that kills me), and then handed his pal the fancy jacket and was all, "this is yours, bud." Then walked out, "My watch has ended."
BOOM.
I'm sad that he's not going to lead the boy band anymore, though. Is he taking his Wildlings with him?

I want to watch another episode, but alas, humans need sleep.
Oh - and Ramsay killed his entire family. Did I say that already? I suppose that was inevitable. Oh, OH, and Ramsay now has Rickon and the awesome wildling lady! I think the last time we saw them, they were leaving Bran and the other chick "for their safety", right? They were just going to go into hiding?
WELL, HIDE BETTER, RICK
And to think, Sansa was JUST THERE. THIS CLOSE to a Stark reunion!

I don't understand why Bran is spending his days in flashback land, but I guess I'm okay with it. Young Ned was cute.

Oh, and Arya has her eyes back, and I think she's officially "no one", which sucks.

I feel like this show is going to tease us with Stark reunions until they're all dead. Arya and Rob and Cat... Bran and Jon that time North of the wall... Arya and Sansa at the Irie when she was with the Hound and the Aunt died... And now Sansa and Rickon by A DAY. I don't think we'll ever get any Stark reunion ever. I think the show is going to fuck with us until they're all dead.

Also, I totally love Sansa now. I used to think she was the worst one, and I'm not even sure when it happened, but I love her.

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAH Welp, the show IMMEDIATELY proved me wrong!
Jon and Sansa!!!! He is SMILING! He's laughing because she doesn't like ale. This is heaven. That hug. THAT FUCKING HUG!
They're arguing now about taking back the North, but I don't even care. I also didn't remember that she was mean to him, but she asked for forgiveness, and he gave it, and it's magic.
Maybe I’m crying. Maybe YOU’RE crying!

AWWWW FUCKING SHIT
DANY IS A FUCKING BOSS
She just burned that temple to the ground with all the Dothraki Lords inside, then walked out like, "what of it?" and all the people were like, "oh, so you're our Queen now? Cool. No prob."
That was FUCKING AWESOME. The fire was hot enough to burn her clothes, but not her hair. I don't even care. #TeamDany Her hair is magic. Fuck it.

Oh, and Ramsay killed the awesome Wildling girl who was guarding Rikkon. That sucked. I really liked her. Even though we haven't seen her in a while, I was still bummed to see her bleeding out on the floor.
Also - that letter that Ramsay sent Jon Snow was the best thing to have happened to that storyline. Now Jon is pissed. You don't piss off a newly-resurrected badass with a witch on his side, Ramsay! Everyone knows that!
I LOVE LOVE LOVE how on-board the Wildling Captain was. No idea what his name is. Beardo. Love him. He didn't even flinch. He was just all, "this is how many soldiers we have who can fight." Because Beardo knows what’s up!
I can't believe I'm about to say this - but I want him to make sweet love to Brienne, maybe after a sword fight, and then roast some meat over the fire. I mean, SURE, her and Jamie would have been FUCKING MAGIC - but I also like that they left them as super pals.
I can't help but be reminded of the centaur at the end of the HP2 musical, and how Umbridge was the only woman strong enough to have their babies. I feel like that's Brienne and Beardo.


I LOVED when Brienne was talking with Davos and Red, and she was like, "I killed Stannis. You bitches got a problem with that?" And Stannis and Red were just like, "Ahhhhh, nope."
Basically what I'm saying is that I love everything Brienne says/does/emotes.

Sansa is being such a badass right now. "What do you think he did to me?" Making Little Finger name what he thinks Ramsay put her through is such a baller move. "You rescued me from monsters who murdered my family and gave me to other monsters who murdered my family."
Her and Jon are my lifeblood right now. I like that she admitted she was stupid. That was basically like a nod to the audience, haha.

Arya has been given another murder task. She has to kill an actress. She’s watching the show where they make fun of her dad REAL HARD. She looks pissed. Maise Williams is a pro.

Theon just took a step towards redemption by endorsing his sister in the King-choosing.
And then the stupid dick face uncle waltzed in and took it from her.
Dick.
Fucking patriarchy.

Dany just forgave Old Man Soldier and was all, "cure yourself, then return to me." and it was VERY EMOTIONAL! "Tyrian Lannister was right. I am in love with you." I feel like ‘Tyrian Lannister was right’ should be the title of this show.

I AM A BROKEN WOMAN. Hodor. Sweet, precious Hodor. You were too good for this world.
“Hold the door.” Ugh. I’m sobbing. I’m destroyed. I need ice cream. I have all the questions. He sort of saw him, right? Young Hodor. I wonder what was going on in his mind at that point. Did he remember? Was it a revelation for him, too? Or did he always know his life was leading to that moment?
And the look on Bran's face as he realized what was happening... that HE was the cause of it.
Fuck that was gloriously heartbreaking.

Also - remember how I theorized that the spell that brought Jon back had something to do with the White Walkers?
Dead wrong.
The pixies or whatever the shit they are created the White Walkers to defend themselves against humans.

Yes!!! Arya didn't kill the actress!! The whole time I was like, "no, girl... there's no turning back after this!" And then she DIDN'T! FUCK YEAH! I fist pumped. Then she went back and got needle. Arya is still Arya!!!
And now the other girl is coming after her to kill her, on the creepy dreamboat's orders. But I mean... c'mon. I ain't worried.

I AM worried about is Marjorie. She drank the koolaid hard.
The troops are marching in to kill the sparrow, and Marjorie is ABOUT HIM. I'm worried. She's all in on that religious bull. UGH.

Aw shit, Dany.
She just rode in on a dragon and gave a bitchen pep talk.
Not sure what the point was, but it was damn awesome.

Ugh, now Tommen drank the kool aid. And he's sending Jamie away because he was going to attack the church or whatever. This storyline is so frustrating.

On the upside - Uncle Benjin! That's fun! That's technically a Stark reunion. I'll take it!

THE HOUND IS ALIIIIIIIIIVE!! Joyous happenstance!!!

Who IS this awesome little girl in charge of Bear Island??? She just gave Jon and Sansa 62 men to fight. "If they're half as ferocious as their lady, House Bolton is doomed." - Davos
Love it

Oh boy. Some dudes just killed all the Hound's new pals. That was dumb of them.

Arya's creepy frenemy STABBED HER IN THE STOMACH A BUNCH, and Arya jumped off a bridge and is now wandering around the town bleeding. That sucks. I thought it would be more of a fight. But this seems correct. Arya never could take on that other girl.

Jamie and Brienne! That was an amazing reunion. They basically only spoke about plot and politics, but the looks, Liana... the LOOKS. When she was like, "one more thing..." and turned back, I was screaming at my screen, KISS, KISS, KISS!!!! I just wanted them to make out so furiously.

And then she was like, "if this goes badly, Imma fuck your shit up,” and Jamie's look was like, "damn." LOVE IT! And his sidekick and Pod catching up. "Do you think they're fuckin'?" I was like, "YES PLEASE!!!!"

Uuuuggghhhh Tommen drank that Kool Aid right up. His lips are blue from drinking so much Kool Aid.

LOL FOREVER - the scene where Tyrian peer pressures Gray Worm and Missandei to drink and tell jokes is outstanding.

When did GoT become so funny?? The Hound with the Brotherhood is total laughs. Negotiating how many of the dudes he gets to kill... haha. "We all die. Well... except this one."
"A girl is Arya Stark of Winterfell. And I am going home."
DROP THE MIC
I am SOOOO glad she's free of that fucking storyline.
I like how they did her fight with the other girl. The chase through the city was cool, and then they didn't show the actual fight. That was smart. I also like how they didn't just have Arya defeat her normally, because that would have been inconsistent. Frenemy was better. But Arya used to be blind, so she snuffed out the candle. Fucking perfect.

"You're going to die tomorrow. Sleep well." Fucking Sansaaaaaaaaaaa
Her and Jon together is my everything.

Haha, Beardo (Tormond… I want to say?) taking everything literally is so funny. When did this show get SO FUNNY???
"Stannis had demons in his head, whispering foul things."
"You saw these demons?"
"What? No. ... they weren't.. they weren't actual demons."
hahaha

I can't believe I'm about to say this, but... I love Theon and his sister. I love them. When did it happen? I don’t know, but it was sudden and ferocious. Yara hitting on Dany is my new favourite thing about Game of Thrones, and now I want them to FACK.
They just made an alliance and I think I orgasmed.
I LOVE how Theon is totally just like, "my sister is better than me. She's going to rule. I'm just here doing my thing."

I'm upset.
I'm so fucking upset.
I knew exactly what was going to happen, and yet I was still rocking back and forth whispering "no, no no no no..."
Rickon running... Jon riding... holding out his hand... and then the arrow hitting him just as Jon reaches him.
I knew it.
I knew as soon as Ramsay cut him loose that he was going to do something horrible.
I just knew it.
And they were so fucking close.
And then the look on Jon's face.
They barely got to see each other's faces and then Rickon was dead.
Fucking hell.
WHY THE HELL DIDN’T HE ZIG-ZAG OR SOMETHING? I actually yelled, “PIVOT, RICKON!”
My heart can't take this.
I shouldn't have marathoned this.
First Hodor now this.
It's too much, I tell you. TOO MUCH.


Fuuuuuuuuck
This episode was amazing.
That whole battle sequence.
The fight for Winterfell was 3 quarters of the episode.
And every second of it was brutal and full of anxiety.
I KNOW Jon is still alive in season 7 because I saw his name on Twitter (the only spoiler I know), and yet I yelled out, "JON!" about five times during that fight.
I thought maybe he'd die and be brought back to life again.
That was bonkers.
And then Sansa shows up with Little Finger's army and DOMINATES
And then Jon beat Ramsay SO HARD - the whole time I was yelling, "punch him to death, Jon! Punch him to death!"
But then when Sansa showed up I was like, "no wait, let Sansa do it!"
And she let the FUCKING DOGS EAT HIM
That was nuts.
Totally wacko
Amazing.

Oh AND - Davos totally knows what Red did to the little girl. Or at least he suspects.
Okay - going to watch the season 6 finale now. Wish me luuuuuuuuck!

Oh shit. Iron Fist just renounced his shit and is getting a gross forehead scar. Ugh. Stupid. I hate this religious storyline. Have I mentioned?
HOLY SHIT
This is NOT a cheery episode!
A bunch of children are murdering people all over the place.

I AM UPSET!!!!!
Uuuugggghhhh I'm so sad.
Marjorie! And Iron Fist and their adorable dad!
I was screaming at the screen, "LET THEM OUT!!!" when Marjorie figured it out.
She was the only one smart enough to get the fuck out of there, and stupid fucking SMELLY SPARROW OF FARTS wouldn't let them out, and now they're all dead.
Fuck. Not that it would have made much difference. The blast took out a city block.
I liked Marjorie so much!
Poor little Tommen is going to be heartbroken.
Their grandma is going to be so pissed. There’s no way she doesn’t strike back after this.
I wanted Cersei to get rid of them, but I didn't want MARJORIE TO DIE
And now Cersei is getting revenge on the nun, which I can't even enjoy because I'm too UPSET.
DAMMIT GAME OF TEARS!

FUCKING WHAT
Tommen!!!
That sweet beautiful prince just took off his crown and walked off a balcony like he was belly-flopping into a pond!
Holy effing eff.
Does Cersei have any kids left? … no. No I don’t believe so.
I like that he made the choice himself, instead of being brutally murdered like his siblings. Strangely empowering for the little tyke.
You were too pure for this world, Tommen.

Awwwwwww Tyrian and Dany are besties and I'm loving it. "Tyrian Lanister, I name you hand of the Queen."

Aw shit yeah!
Arya just killed Walder Fray (aka Filch)
So, she can still use her faces even though she peaced-out from the face-cult? Doesn’t she need access to that wall of faces? Or does she have her own collection? If so… where does she keep them???? I hope they're in an air-tight container, AMMIRIGHT?
Get some rubbermaid, girl.
You know what, I'm just gonna let it go. Fuck it. Suspend your disbelief, Toni
And she was the girl who was staring and flirting with Jamie!!
She was probably sizing him up for battle.
"When people ask you what happened here, tell them the North remembers. Tell them winter came for house Fray."
Daaayyyyuummm girl!

TWIST!
HUGE FUCKING TWIST
Jon isn't Ned's son!!!
He's LIANA'S SON!
This is huge!
And now all the Lords have pledged themslves to him because he's "got Ned Stark's blood in his veins", and Little Finger is poisoning Sansa's mind, making her think it should be HER (puke, fuck off Little Finger, their sibling relationship JUST became amazing).
"King of the North!"
Nuts!
Who is the father? Do we know that already?
Or OH MY GOD IS THE FATHER ROBERT BARATHEON??
They dated, right?
Or is it the other king, the mad one who Jamie killed? Or wait, he’s not the one who kidnapped her, right? It was his son? I don’t remember. I’m too excited to remember.
So many questions!
If it was, does that mean he has a bid for the throne? Or wait.. I guess he’s illegitimate. Although, considering how sexist this fictional world is, they would rather a boy than a girl, and both have Targarian blood.
Oh man. THE IMPLICATIONS!


And the amount of times Jon’s mom was referred to as “some southern whore” or the like. And the whole time it was LYANNA FUCKING STARK. Madness.

Oh, and Dany is on her way to Westville
It's all very exciting.

I wish I didn't have to go to bed right now. Ugh. I want to watch ALL OF SEASON 7
There only 7 eps, right?
That's probably for the best.
I don't think my heart can take much more of this.

I'll bet the ending will be all the main characters are dead, and the background characters take over. The end. I feel like George RR Martin is that kind of guy. OR someone stupid will end up on the throne. Like Little Finger. Fuck, I’d be so mad.

                                                                         SEASON 7

If we don't get a reunion with Arya, Jon and Sansa, I'm going to lose my damn shit.
Please, please, PLEASE let Arya return to Winterfell. Please. I need it, Liana. I need it so bad. 

Sansa and Jon are fighting in front of the other houses, but then they made up.
Oh, and Bran is at Castle Black!
They're all SO CLOSE!
I understand why Rickon had to die, narrative-wise, but if they kill Bran before he reunites with his siblings I will RIOT.

I wish Little Finger would leave. He's poisoning Jon and Sansa's relationship.
Scratch that - Little Finger needs to die.
Seriously.
His crush on Sansa is super creepy.
How old is she right now? 19?
And it's not just the age difference that's creepy, because I would have been perfectly content if she fell in love with Tyrian.
It's everything about Little Finger that's creepy.
Everything.
I don't understand why Little Finger thinks he has a chance at the Iron Throne.
He's no one.
Wasn't he a ward of the Tully's?

Is it weird how much I want a Sansa / Tyrian reunion?
I hate that her last name is now Bolton.
Puke.

Speaking of, the sequence of Sam at the citadel in a constant cycle of trying not to barf is amazing.
I was so bored with him at first, but now I love him. Game of Thrones loves to do that to me.
And I even sort of like Gilly, which is a shock.

I'm mad. Arya was SO CLOSE to Winterfell, but now she's headed the other way to King's Landing to kill Cersei. Ugh. Just GO HOME, ARYA!
Also - Ed Sheeran? ... ummmmmmmmm sure.

Missandei and Gray Worm might be the most adorable love story in GoT, nee, the world.

OMG HOT PIE
YES!
You beautiful, glorious boy.
He told Arya that Jon took back Winterfell.
FUCKING YES
Ugh, now I have to go meet a friend when all I want to do is finish this entire season in one night.
Stupid friends.

Jon and Sansa are the beating heart of this show right now. Arya is on her way to Winterfell and Jon is LEAVING, and I am upset. There isn't going to be a reunion, is there? I am UPSET.

"You are leaving Winterfell, you're leaving your home!"
"Yes, but I leave it in good hands."
"Whose?"
"Yours."
Ugh.
My heart.

This battle at sea has my nerves SHOT.
Is Yara dead?
The uncle had her and Theon jumped off the boat (sad face), and then there was a silhouette of someone hanging from the mast, but I couldn't see if it was her.

Dany and Jon's first meeting was ELECTRIC
I can see why people want them to FACK
I wanted everyone in the room to start making out furiously.
EVERYONE
"Does Sansa miss me terribly?" haha Tyrian is EVERYONE's best friend.
Are Jon and Dany related? No, don’t tell me.
I feel like they are, though. I think I’m being dumb in thinking he could be Robert’s son. It’s impossible, right? How long was Lyanna kidnapped for? It has to be Dany’s brother.
So Rheagar (who henceforth shall be known as Ray), must have been MUCH older than the other two.
If Dany was just a baby when the King was killed, and Ray was old enough to kidnap and rape and impregnate Liana, all before Dany was even born.
So that means Ray is Jon's dad.
OH SHIT. That makes Dany his AUNT.
Fuuuuuck.
They can't sex together!
Tell the fanbase to stop wanting that!

I loved it when Missandei took forever with all Dany's names, and then Davos was just like, "This is Jon Snow."
hahaha

Holy shit. Cersei's revenge against Oberon's wife and her daughter...
I don't know their names.
But fuck.
That's fucking crazy.
I liked the daughters. I'm sad all of them are dead.
But they deserved it.
That's the best of this show. You don't know who to root for.

BRAN AND SANSA!
Bran is back in Winterfell!
He's a bit of a weirdo, but whatevs.
Like, maybe don't bring up that you can see your sister's brutal rape on the first day back?

Also - can we talk about what a badass Sam is for saving Jorah. He PEELED AWAY THE GROSSNESS

Awwww shit - I'm going to miss the Queen of Thorns, but I am SO GLAD she confessed to Joffrey's murder after she drank that poison LIKE A BOSS.
Jamie's face was amazing.

I'm sad that Bran isn't Bran anymore.
He is but he isn't.
I feel cheated out of these reunions. He barely cares.
And his goodbye to Mirra was heartbreaking. She was so emotional, and he was just staring at her.

I thought the guards at the gate were going to die when they weren't letting Arya in. Or at least get knocked out. haha
That was a great scene.

Okay. I get it. I can see why everyone wants Jon and Dany to FACK. I so, so, so wish he wasn't her nephew. Ugh. Just typing it makes me feel skivvy. But like... maybe I don't care? I don't KNOW, okay??!?!? This show has me all topsy turvy.
"What do you think of her?"
"Who?"
sigh "I believe you know of whom I speak."
"She has a good heart."
"Hmmm... I've seen you staring at her good heart."
Haha, Davos is a total shipper.


Arya and Brienne training together was fucking amazing. I don't know why Sansa is upset about it. though. Is it because Arya is so different, or is she jealous that she's taking Brienne? Or is she afraid of Arya?

GAHHHHHHH OMG OMG OMG
This season is the BEST SEASON
It's like all the other seasons were just build-up to all the fucking PAYOFFS this season is giving to us.
Firstly, when Theon was pulling his boat up, it didn't dawn on me what his presence meant until the look on Jon's face, and I GASPED SO LOUD THAT NOW MY THROAT HURTS.
"Sansa, is she okay?"
"What you did for her is the only reason I'm not killing you right now." FUUUUUUUCKING SO GOOD!

And then the BATTLE
With Dany flying in on a dragon to destroy the Lanister army.
And Tyrian watching.
And Jamie's friend (who used to be TYRIAN'S best friend) shooting at the dragon, and I was like, "I DON'T KNOW WHAT SIDE TO CHEER FOR!"
Obviously Dany, but I wanted her to win and somehow capture both Jamie and the best friend ALIVE.
But now they’re both sinking to the bottom of a lake, and Tyrian is standing there WATCHING IT ALL HAPPEN."Flee you idiot... you fucking idiot."
OMG IT'S ALL SO GOOD!

Oop, excellent. The friend saved Jamie, and they're both fine. THEY'RE BOTH FINE, guys, don't even worry about it.

The friend and Jamie subtly making fun of Dickon's name was pure joy. Anyway... he's dead now.

GENDRYYYYYYYYYY
MY LOINS ARE EXPLODING WITH UNABASHED JOY
When he brutally kills the guards..."This is Gendry." - "He'll do."
Davos, Tyrian and Gendry on a boat is everything I never knew I always wanted.

OMG GIlly just read in one of the nerd’s books that Ray got an annulment and married someone else in secret. IT WAS LYANNA! Jon is LEGITIMATE! And no one knows because no one knows enough to CARE, and Gilly read it out loud to Sam, who barely paid attention!
This show is bonkers!

Gendry was going to go to WInterfell, but instead he's all, "I'm going with Jon over the wall," and the whole time I was like, "BUT ARYA!"
If they don't reunite I'm rioting.
If ALL THREE of them don't reunite, I'm rioting. Arya and Jon and Gendry.
I don’t know exactly how to riot, but if Game of Thrones doesn’t get its shit together, I WILL LEARN.

I hate Little Finger. I hate him, I hate him, I hate him. I have no idea what just happened, but I know it's bad. He hid some scroll in his room and Arya read it, and it had Sansa's signature. I didn't see what it said, but Arya looked upset. THEN we see stupid LIttle Finger watching, which means he planted it.
UGH
I don't know what he's doing, but it's going to be bad.
All I want is all the Stark siblings to love and like each other unconditionally forever until the end of time.

And now the HOUND is with Gendry and Jon and Beardo, and they're going North of the wall to capture a White Walker to show to Cersei to... do what, I'm not sure. Have her donate her soldiers?
Whatever. I like this crew of peeps, and I want them BACK on the correct side of the wall immediately, and on their way to Winterfell to FUCKING REUNITE WITH ARYA.

I'm paused in the fight between the Dead and our band of heroes on a tiny rock on a frozen river.I must say, I'm glad there's only one more episode after this, because my body can't handle this anxiety.At one point I yelled out, "NOT BEARDO!" Because I love him. I love him and his crush on Brienne.
And I am very sad that Sansa sent Brienne to King's Landing.
And I hate Little Finger.
I hate him, I hate him, I hate him.
And now Arya is SO PISSED at Sansa because she wrote a letter. I get it, she thinks Sansa betrayed her family, but like, get a grip, Arya... that was in SEASON 1. Get over it! Do NOT put your sister on your list!

OHHHHHH NOOOOOOO
One of Dany's dragons died! MASSIVE FUCKING SAD FACE! And then the White Walkers BROUGHT HIM BACK.
This is bad.
This is very very bad.

On the upside, Dany and Jon are totally in love, and I don't even care that they're related.
What IS IT with George RR Martin and incest??
Whatever. I'm just going to pretend like I don't know that they're related. After all, THEY don't. It's not like Jamie and Cersei (who will forever creep me out. Any time they kiss I cringe).
Dany and Jon are different. They didn't grow up together. They don't KNOW they're related.
So fuck it.
I want it.
I want it so hard.

I also want Arya to stop being such a little psycho.
Sansa is YOUR SISTER. Don't threaten to take her face, you little weirdo!
I love it when she's a badass, but not when she gets deranged. Just relax anf focus on brutally killing your enemies.
Oh, and hug your brother.
JUST GIVE ME WHAT I WANT, GoT!

I'm freaking out.
I can't handle the stress.
They just showed up in King's Landing, and they're in the area or whatever, and I just can't handle this.
There are too many important people all in one place.
This is going to be another fucking Red Wedding, isn't it?
There's no way all these people I love make it out of the arena alive.
Oh, and Brienne and the Hound made up!! They were all, “our little murderer is all grown up.”
That was nice.
And a Tyrian/ Podrick reunion was marvelous.
But seriously. I'm so worried right now.
I love too many of these people, and I know some of them are going to die.
I'm scccured, Liana.

Oh Jon. You beautiful, honorable, stupid dreamboat.
Cersei's look of horror was very satisfying when the zombie popped out of the box.
But then Jon was all, "nawww I'm not gonna be loyal to you, btich, I'm hot for Dany."
And Cersei got all butt hurt and was like, "TRUCE OFF!"

Oh, but Yara’s alive! So that’s good news. And Theon is going to try and get her back. You go, little buddy!

OH MY SWEET MOTHERFUCKING BEAUTIFUL TWIST!!!!!
Sansa ... Littlefinger... Arya... Bran

I am SO HAPPY RIGHT NOW
Sansa was all, "Imma gonna fuck over Arya... oh no wait, I'm gonna fuck over LORD BAYLISH, BITCHES!"
And then she gave Arya the nod and Arya slit his throat without a moment's hesitation.
WITH HIS OWN KNIFE
Outstanding.
I'm fist pumping the air right now.
I'm not sure I've ever been more satisfied with anything more than Arya slitting his throat.
And Littlefinger being all, “you have no proof”, and Bran was just, “you’re in the presence of a couple of weirdos, pal, and one of them happens to know literally everything. You done, son.”
And then the talk they had while gazing out at the snow.
Quoting their father, saying how they have to stick together.
"You're the strongest person I know."
"That is the nicest thing you've ever said to me."
"Don't get used to it, you're still annoying and weird."


Holy fucking hell.
I'm finished.
Fucking shit.
So many things.

Having Bran narrate his vision and the fact that Jon is actually Dany's nephew took a bit of the satisfaction out their steamy sex scene, haha
I was like, "shut up, Bran! I'm trying to enjoy this!"
And now the secret is out! Sam knows Jon is the heir to the Iron Throne!
He's legitimate! He's never been a bastard!
His talk with Theon, when he was like, “He’s as much a part of you as he is of me.” I was like, BOY YOU DON'T KNOW HOW RIGHT YOU ARE!

Tyrian seemed weirdly upset when Dany and Jon were fuckin’. Like, bud, I love you, but stop creeping!

And Bran and Sam were hilarious.
“I’m the three eyed raven.” - “Oh. I don’t know what that is.”
Hahahahahha forever
I’m so happy about everything. Except for Beardo, because that man definitely just died at the wall. He was at the top, then it came crashing down.
If he’s still alive, I’m calling bullshit, except then I’ll immediately throw that bullshit away because I’ll be SO HAPPY. Love that guy.
Oh, and we didn’t get a Jon/Arya reunion, but he IS on his way, so…...

And the fucking ZOMBIE DRAGON. Shit guys, have fun with THAT.


Oh, and JAMIE finally left Cercei and is now headed North! He’s going to team up with the good guys! Very pleased.

I'll admit, I was bored with the show when I paused. I didn't really feel like going back to it. But now I cannot WAIT for the last season.

I thought it was excellent payoff. I was ready to give up on the show, and then BAM, here's all that payoff you've been waiting for, Toni. Game of Thrones always pays its debts!
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Sep 13, 2017
Thanks! They were hilarious to read. :)
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