I'm Afraid of Everything Wade: (singing) I'm afraid of being a coward. I'm scared of being afraid. I worry that I worry too much. I'm afraid. "Afraid" is another name for Wade! Rocks, flowers, herbal tea. They all pose a threat to me. Water, clouds, trees, and sky. Oh, yeah, I forgot, I'm afraid to fly! I'm afraid of something that makes a strange sound. I'm scared of a bug that crawls on the ground. I worry about things that I can't see. Then when I see 'em, they really scare me! Day and night scare me, too. I'm even scared of me and you! I'm afraid of everything!! STOP THE MUSIC!!! WHAT AM I DOING?! I'm even scared to sing!
Roy: This is the 14th time i've done this to him today.
Orson: Wade, you're afraid of the silliest things. Wade: I am not. Orson: "The pimentoes in olives are staring at you." Wade: It's possible. Orson: "The entire nation of Paraguay is talking about you behind your back." Wade: A valid concern. Orson: "Staplers are spying on important paperwork to take over the world." Wade: Can you prove they're not?
Apparently Wade has a file cabinet (called Wade's Worry File) that contains literally everything he is afraid of.
"This space for rent": Sign Orson points at Wade's head.
S 8 : Ep 13
Aired 5/19/91
S 8 : Ep 12
Aired 5/18/90
S 8 : Ep 11
Aired 11/22/89
S 8 : Ep 6
Aired 5/8/87
User Score: 323
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User Score: 120
User Score: 100
User Score: 73
User Score: 69
User Score: 64