Gary Unmarried Season 1 Episode 8

Allison: You have to with me up to Big Bear this weekend; Beth and Jim are renewing their wedding vows.
Gary: Oh, no I don't. Cause you got Beth and Jim in the divorce and I got the corn holders.
Allison: You mean Donna and P.J.?
Gary: No, not the Kornholters. The actual corn holders.

Gary: What party!? The Annual Gary's House Painting Party, remember?
Allison: God, I'm so glad I don't have to have that party at my house this year.
Gary: Can I have that party at your house this year?
Allison: What? No!

Gary: Listen, alright, now that we have agreed to start seeing other people- are you seeing other people?
Vanessa: Do you really wanna know that?
Gary: Yeah, I wanna know that.
Vanessa: Yes.
Gary: I don't wanna know that.

Beth: Gary, I thought you were -
Gary: Getting snacks for Allison. I was.
Beth: You're covered in leaves.
Gary: Yeah. Wicked leaf fight with the Best Western across the street. We kicked their ass.

Allison: What did you do? Jump out her window?
Gary: I had to jump out her window. I almost got caught red-handed doing nothing wrong by my pretend wife.

Beth: Look at him, staring into her eyes and hanging on every little word she says.
Allison: That's my Gary. He's a great listener.
Beth: Looks like he'd like to listen her brains out.

Allison: Come on Gary. You know my relationship with Beth. I can't have her gloat all weekend about how she's still married and I'm not.
Gary: OK, hi. She is still married and you're not.

Vanessa: Thank you for finding my cell phone. I've been looking everywhere for it.
Gary: Yeah, I called you to tell you but you didn't pick up.