George Lopez

Season 5 Episode 21

George Discovers How Mescal-ed Up His Life Would Have Been Without the Benny-Fits

Aired Wednesday 8:00 PM Apr 05, 2006 on ABC



  • Trivia

  • Quotes

    • George: Mom, I swear if you touch another one of my clubs I'll take your..... I'll hurt your... Dammit! There's nothing she's cares about!

    • Benny: Angie, he cheated me. I should have won. I had the highest numbers.
      Angie: Is that true? Did she have the highest numbers?
      George: Look, she's been cheating on her time card for years.
      Benny: What does that have to do with this contest? I did the work.
      Angie: Well whoever did the most work should win. I mean George you have to be a man of your word.
      George: Why? She's never been a man of her word.

    • Benny: That's my steering wheel.
      George: You'll get it back when I get back my golf clubs and the new driver you're going to buy me.
      Benny: How am I supposed to do that if I can't use my car?
      George: I'm gonna say the same thing to you that you said to me when I was 8 and I stepped on that nail that went through my foot, "Not my problem."

    • Gina (talking to dream-sequence Manager Ernie): I just want you to know if my job is in jeopardy, I'll do anything you want. If you say 'jump,' I'll say 'on what?'

    • Benny: Don't call me 'mom'. you are not my son anymore.
      George: Yes! Finally the nightmare ends. Maybe now I can find a real mom. I'm gonna put an ad in the paper. (writing) Looking for non-smoker. Willing to hug. Must be adult height.

    • Benny (seeking revenge for the Reno trip): No it's not over. You screwed me, now I'm going to get you. It's payback time.
      George: What are you going to do? Raise me again?

    • George (Gina asks George to go with her to Reno): Gina the hotel in Reno doesn't have turn down service, but I do. No

    • George: You never taught me anything. You just punished me. I wasn't hooked on Phonics. I was hooked to a radiator.

    • Benny: Nobody's got as good numbers as mine.
      George: No way. You made these up.
      Benny: Go out and check the warehouse. I haven't worked so hard since I tried to teach you how to spell 'cat.'

    • George: While all the kids were camping and getting Indian names, I was alone in the backyard. So I had to come up with my own name, 'boy who plays with himself.' After I told the other Rangers my name, no one would do the secret handshake with me anymore.

    • Benny: Like I told the guy I picked up at Thirsty's last night, "Cut the chit chat and give mamma what she came for."

    • George: Alright everyone, the contest is over. I need your productivity numbers. Let's see who's going to Reno.
      Benny: Hey George, ask me where I'm going.
      George: I already know where you're going mom. It's hot, full of sinners, and you'll be dating Hitler. That's his punishment.

  • Notes

  • Allusions

    • George references the once well known phrase from the '80s and '90s "Hooked on Phonics worked for me." Hooked on Phonics was a popular educational literacy program famous because of the many tv and radio ads which made famous by phrase.