George: (After outrunning the dog) God, that was close!
Angie: Wait! Where's Benny?
George: Who cares!
George: Look, this is my mom's dog, she's really depressed and if I take it back to her it'll cheer her up.
Biker: I get it. My mom was real depressed when she stabbed my dad and he just wouldn't die.
George: Yeah, thanks, man. I'm glad you get this.
Benny: I haven't seen you that scared since that Halloween when I chased you around the house with a knife!
George: That might've been funny on Halloween, but it was Easter.
George: I'll distract him with the bologna while you tie the rope on him.
Ernie: (After eating all the bologna) Why didn't you tell me that was the plan?
George: I'm telling you now. Give me the bologna.
Ernie: No... I mean... (Throws away the empty container)
George: Where's the bologna?
Ernie: Inside me...
George: Why the hell did you eat it all? What did you think it was for?
Ernie: FOR COMING WITH YOU!
This is Los Angeles Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa's 1st television series appearance as himself.
For the second week in a row, ABC's "George Lopez" won its time period in Total Viewers (8.4 million) and Adults 18-49 (3.3/10). The fifth-year ABC comedy also ranked No. 1 in its half-hour among Adults 18-34 (2.9/10-tie) and Adults 25-54 (3.8/10).
George Lopez was up from its week-ago season premiere by 7% among Adults 18-34 (2.9/10 vs. 2.7/8).